Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: emptylostsoul (44611)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: I feel so stupid
turned123
♂ Member
Member # 33663
Frustrated  Posted: 12:55 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ive had some time to reflect and look back on my year long new beginning. I saw things the way I wanted to see them not how they really were. I feel stupid, used and cast aside. My role in my disapiontment was considerable. The truth is she was just coasting. I'm just pissed today. Pissed at myself, pissed at her, pissed at being single again. The upside is that the sadness has lifted and I have a better grip on how my perception is just that, and reality checks are needed more often than I thought.


me BS 48
her WW 45
married 15 years
divorced
3 wonderful but hurt kids

Posts: 334 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: milwaukee
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 12:57 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Don't feel stupid. This was another life lesson for you to learn from is all. We all go through it.

(((turned123)))


I'm sorry if you don't like my Honesty, but to be fair I don't like your lies.

Sometimes it's better to push someone away...not because you stopped loving them but because you can't take the pain anymore.


Posts: 13707 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
notmeanymore
♀ Member
Member # 9772
Default  Posted: 1:07 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't know if it will come as any consolation, but you're not the first person to fall into that trap.

You'll be wiser next time.


"Put the cuckoo back in the clock baby" - Four Brothers

Posts: 866 | Registered: Feb 2006
jo2love
♀ Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 1:10 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((turned)))


Posts: 34491 | Registered: Mar 2011
turned123
♂ Member
Member # 33663
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Not the first person
Sooo true! Thanks gang!


me BS 48
her WW 45
married 15 years
divorced
3 wonderful but hurt kids

Posts: 334 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: milwaukee
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 1:15 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The upside is that the sadness has lifted and I have a better grip on how my perception is just that, and reality checks are needed more often than I thought.
This is great, turned. Growth and progress. Well done, you.


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 24789 | Registered: Aug 2011
turned123
♂ Member
Member # 33663
Default  Posted: 1:29 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you nik!... something about old dogs and new tricks


me BS 48
her WW 45
married 15 years
divorced
3 wonderful but hurt kids

Posts: 334 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: milwaukee
k94ever
♀ Member
Member # 11176
Default  Posted: 4:03 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You aren't stupid.

Face it....most of us haven't dated in DECADES and things have changed enormously.

You aren't stupid. The relationship didn't work and you are better prepared for the next one.

Plus you dodged the bullet with her.

But look on the up side....you at least were dating!!!!!!!!!

Stop over-thinking this. You. Are. Not. Stupid.

k9


BS: 56
WS: 53
Betrayed: 23 years
Affairs: 14 (2 lasted 3 months. Rest were ONS)
WS died: 16 May 2011
Do not stay in your hurt forever. Choose to move out of it.

Posts: 6491 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: Wisconsin
turned123
♂ Member
Member # 33663
Default  Posted: 4:16 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

K9 thank you! I know it's just a brief feeling. There are some things I don't regret. I don't regret being able to open my heart again!!! I don't regret learning to laugh again! I don't regret giving myself! I do regret not acting on the red flags when I saw them! It truly is a live and learn!!! so I also don't regret dodging another bullet


me BS 48
her WW 45
married 15 years
divorced
3 wonderful but hurt kids

Posts: 334 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: milwaukee
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 4:51 PM, April 15th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I saw things the way I wanted to see them not how they really were.

I did this throughout my M and I don't feel confident that I wouldn't do it again - my picker is on the fritz and I need to take time to develop healthy coping mechanisms. Head in sand doesn't work for me but it seems to be my reflex reaction.

You're going to be OK friend. Learning what you don't want is as important as knowing what you do want.

[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 5:02 PM, April 15th (Monday)]


Buzz- The word you are searching for is 'Space-Ranger.'
Woody- The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there are Pre-school toys here.

Posts: 5527 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
turned123
♂ Member
Member # 33663
Default  Posted: 6:42 AM, April 16th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Strongbutbroken I do know what I want You are correct learning what stands in the way of that is key! Sometimes it's dressed like a cute and fuzzy bunny but it has REALLY big sharp teeth


me BS 48
her WW 45
married 15 years
divorced
3 wonderful but hurt kids

Posts: 334 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: milwaukee
Topic Posts: 11

Return to Forum: New Beginnings Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.