Last night was horrid. Woke up twice yelling from a dead sleep from bad dreams. Dreams are always about being betrayed or abandoned by WH.
I have been diagnosed with PISD, on AD's in IC. I do have moments that I'm ok, I smile and have peace for a few hours. But it's always just a short while before I trigger and spiral down. WH is always asking what he can do, tries to help. Right now, I think I'm going through an anger stage. I want him to help, but I don't want him to help. He tells me that I'll never understand the remorse he feels, because it overwhelms him. Idk, maybe I need him to verbalize it more. Every day, sometimes every hour I want something different. But in the end, what I really want is to feel safe.