Itís a strange feeling. I feel like I am coming out of the dark.
For those who have not read my posts, my FWH finally realized he had a FOO issue that he really was not aware of. It has just been uncovered via his IC and is now being worked with. This is over 2 years and countless hours of IC/MC. Almost an ah-ha for both of us. This makes his brokenness almost understandable. (No, does NOT excuse his actions) Plus he is not hiding from it, rather facing it head-on. Once he discovered it, actually requested a second IC appointment for the same week.
There has been a lot to deal with in these two plus years. The latest was my STD diagnosis as a result of his A. Then starting AD as that diagnosis was just a bit over what I could deal with without it. Doc has me on lowest possible dose as she didnít feel like I needed a strong one, and 4 weeks later I think she is right.
But after talking with him for hours this week, watching him as opened up SO completely to me, laying himself completely bareÖ..I felt darkness lift. I donít know how else to explain it. I am not being judgmental about it, I am trying to walk the fine line of being there, but letting him do the work he needs to do.
I donít know if this is yet another high phase on the awful rollercoaster, the effects of the AD, or do dare I say it for fear of jinxing it, could it be my first step towards acceptance and forgiveness??
Thoughts on this, oh wonderful wise SIers????
In R and Tryin 2 Have Faith
ME- BS 35
HIM- WS 38
4 - 6 months of TT'ing
RDay 7/2013 :)