Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: EverythingAfter (44970)

Off Topic Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Shit....
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 3:06 PM, May 7th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks NIK :)

I agree Janet, DNA is important.

I am hoping he steps up, I can't imagine not loving your child.

I am trying to wait to see what happens before I run away with "what may happen". I will love this baby and pray he/she is happy and healthy.


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3805 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
Rebreather
♀ Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 6:20 PM, May 7th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow, how complicated.

I concur with the previous posts about not just being able to randomly sign away parental rights. In addition, if he does so, you are no longer the child's grandparent. YOU have no rights to the child, the child's legacy is severed.


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6449 | Registered: Jan 2011
GrievingMommy
♀ Member
Member # 28127
Default  Posted: 8:59 PM, May 7th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I haven't had the chance to read all of the replies, but you said 'on and off girlfriend'. Are you sure it's his? Either way, I'd insist on a DNA test.

Hugs!!


Me - Now 36 y/o
WXH: Now 45 y/o and 18+ hrs away -NPD asshole now onto wife #3.
My sweeties: 5 yr old B/G twins. 90% custody (or more) since 14 months old.
D-Day 4/4/10 PA('s?) & EA's - D'd 7/11

Posts: 1691 | Registered: Apr 2010 | From: Upper Midwest
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 3:32 PM, May 8th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG

This

In addition, if he does so, you are no longer the child's grandparent. YOU have no rights to the child, the child's legacy is severed.

Is so sad...

And yes, GM DNA will be a definite.

It is complicated and it's sad.

I can't believe two adults (young but still adults) could be so thoughtless and quite frankly, stupid and selfish in their choices.


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3805 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
Rebreather
♀ Member
Member # 30817
Default  Posted: 6:23 PM, May 8th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sorry! I'm always such a Debbie Downer. But I've worked on this issue a lot, and it is so much more complicated than it seems. ((hugs)) to you and your family.


Me BS
Him WH
2 ddays in '07
Recovering.
"The cure for the pain, is the pain." -Rumi

Posts: 6449 | Registered: Jan 2011
karmahappens
♀ Member
Member # 35846
Default  Posted: 5:32 AM, May 9th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sorry! I'm always such a Debbie Downer

No, not at all. I never even considered that if he was able to give up his rights I would lose mine (if any) too.

Better to have the heads up than to have the head in the sand!!


“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom”
Anaïs Nin
Me: 45
Him: 47
Dday 8/2007
We have R'd

Posts: 3805 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Massachusetts
Ashland13
♀ Member
Member # 38378
Default  Posted: 4:35 PM, May 15th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm really sorry, Karma.

I don't have much for advice but to say I've seen this a few times with relatives.

And you sound like a very caring person-I hope that grandbaby will get to have you in his or her life.

There is one instance where a relative didn't know about her grandchild until the baby was three years old. The father claimed a ONS -very, very young, these parents-and the mother, when found, told my relative she didn't want anything to do with them. She didn't even know the paternal grandmother but the lady has no choice or part in the child's life and doesn't think she ever will.

She did insist the son have testing and all the whatnot and he would claim "the answers got lost!" several times.

So I hope that you will have an easier time than this grandma did. FFWIW, this is also in MA.

The same family has another grandchild OOW (out of wedlock) and he or she is basically being raised by the grandparents in this case. What was sad was when the court appearances began, the father was going to try not appearing. He had no idea that he may chance forfeiting the child's right to it's other relatives, like if he were to sign away his rights or pull a no show.

So no real advice, but good wishes and some examples I knew of to share. The latter example is a pretty wild little person, without many boundaries and with a bunch of ailments who goes back and forth between homes. But they are doing their best by the child and at least he or she had someone like you, Karma, to stand up for them.

Yes, going to a family lawyer is a really good idea. This has been done in both instances that I related here and sometimes, like in my own life, just being able to say "I asked a lawyer's advice", can go a long way. Maybe it's a good place to find some comfort and there are some who do free consultations, I believe?


Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington


Posts: 2229 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: New England
Topic Posts: 27
Pages: 1 · 2

Return to Forum: Off Topic Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.