Well...he emails my sister today apologizing for his heartless mother not wanting to hold Piper or even look at her... sayiing that she only acted like that because she knew that *I* hated her and him. I don't hate them. I hate how they treated my daughter and I!!! During my pregnancy and after!!!
Then he has the nerve to say that "If I had needed his help or needed the money....all I had to do was let him know and he would have helped me, but if I want to go this route than that is fine too...." He said that he had been giving me $200 a month and he knows that the ordered $65 isn't much...but that ALL I HAD TO DO WAS ASK!!! OMG!!!! JACKASS!!!!!! He hasn't given me one red cent since the beginning of December and when I did get in a fight with him a couple of months ago....he said that he wasn't going to give me any money "UNLESS" I was on good terms with him!!! So, I told him to shove his good terms up his scrawny blackmailing deadbeat ASS!!!!
Please stop me before I respond to his manipulating bullshit!!!!!! SERIOUS 2x4's needed!!!!!!!!!!!!
ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12
Stay the course Shelly and stick with NC. Piper needs you to focus on what matters and ignore the noise from the sperm donor. ((Hugs))
Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling
Been there, done that, trust me.
Let me give you a glimpse into your future. Your dd is 16, beautiful, intelligent, kind, trustworthy, strong and confident. She's has struggled to understand why and how her father could be the way he was, but has come out the other side viewing the situation with maturity. Sadly, she pities her dad but knows his lack of involvement or support was his choice, and not a reflection on her.
Honestly Shelly, I was exactly where you are 15 years ago and had to pick my head up and make sure I was all I could be for her because it wasn't going to come from him. Once I got over the outrage.. well, I just don't feel much about him to be honest. We made it just fine. And you will too.
I needed to hear all of that! I know he is just full of crap but he still seems to know how to get under my skin! I will keep NC. I know it is for the best. I look forward to watching my little one grow up....she is going to be so beautiful!
If your sister can block him, have her do it. If she can't or won't, ask her to stop passing along his crap manipulations. And if she won't, stop reading/listening to it.
"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
If he really WAS sorry, he would have contacted you directly. What a chicken shit move to contact your sister. It is immature, manipulative and passive aggressive.
The very best thing you can do is see this situation for what it IS. A pathetic move on his part. Roll your eyes, brush him off and keep moving forward.
Letting go really is a gift for yourself (and your cute dd!)
"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings
Okay....vent over. I feel better now..... I'm so glad I have SI to vent my rage in...
His actions show someone who doesn't care. FTG Piper is better off without having someone who doesn't care about her in her life. It leaves room for those who do care.
My DD (22) has a 1 yo daughter and babydaddy is non existent in her life. And after what my DD went thru with my split from XH and the subsequent crap of being a child of a NPD parent. She has opted to support DGD on her own (well with my help-she lives with me). There are places to go for help WIC, Medicaid, childcare etc. Utilize them if you are able.. they are mostly temporary and can help you for a time.
[This message edited by Kajem at 8:56 AM, May 10th (Friday)]
I appreciate my mom's dedication and hard work so much. That woman is a SAINT in my eyes.
Your daughter will see it the same way. Promise.
[This message edited by Fireball72 at 1:10 PM, May 10th (Friday)]