Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: Tina73 (44910)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Of course she did!
Dadtryingtocope
♂ Member
Member # 36726
Default  Posted: 3:01 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So I hear through the grape vine my EW just got engaged to the AP. Of course she did. She just had her D finalized less than a month ago. Why wouldn't she get engaged now?

I don't know whether I should jump for joy, break down and cry. This is crazyness isn't it? I mean she was married 9 month ago to someone else. I don't get it. I'm half in shock. Who does this? What kind of message is this for my kids?

On top of that she is also trying to come after me for more money. Not a lot about $4k. But the D is done, I paid dearly already. I'm not looking to give her a wedding gift now.

I'm still trying to find a way off the crazy train.


BH me 46
WW her 38
DDay 8-17-12
2 kids (12, 9)
Filed for D 9/14/12
Divorced 4/17/13
She - engaged 5/13 married 9/13

Posts: 510 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: PA
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 3:18 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sorry. I know it is a caught 22.
Big hugs to you.


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 19 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
False R. Still Lying.
Will be divorcing soon!
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have"!

Posts: 2661 | Registered: Aug 2011
hurtbs
♀ Member
Member # 10866
Default  Posted: 3:22 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow, they waited until their D's were official to get engaged? My ex got engaged to both OW within weeks of dating, before D's were even filed...


Me BW Him XSAWH
DDays 2006, and then numerous more
Divorced 2012

"In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate." - Asimov
"Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you." - Ovid


Posts: 15321 | Registered: Jun 2006
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 3:22 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((dttc & kids)))) It's unbelievable, isn't it?


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 25289 | Registered: Aug 2011
7yrsflushed
♂ Member
Member # 32258
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry DTTC. It is craziness but thankfully it's no longer your craziness.


D-day 5/24/11
BH = Me
2 children
The first true sense of calm I felt in YEARS was when I filed for D...
Divorced 9/2/14 and loving life!

Posts: 1903 | Registered: May 2011 | From: VA
Dadtryingtocope
♂ Member
Member # 36726
Default  Posted: 4:27 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes and thanks. I should of course not even care but somehow it is still troubling. Most of my close friends say it will self destruct. I guess we will see.

In the meantime, back to living my life the way I want to. :)


BH me 46
WW her 38
DDay 8-17-12
2 kids (12, 9)
Filed for D 9/14/12
Divorced 4/17/13
She - engaged 5/13 married 9/13

Posts: 510 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: PA
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 4:39 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry DTTC. It is craziness but thankfully it's no longer your craziness.

THIS.

In time you won't care what she does. You'll put it all in a general crazy pile and nothing will surprise you.

It is hard to see them make a train wreck of their lives but at least we can be thankful that we're no longer on that train.

Ask your friends to not tell you anything about her. I did and it really helped me detach.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5554 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Jayne Doe
♀ Member
Member # 32664
Default  Posted: 6:53 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so looking forward to your future posts of Karma stories.

You know they are coming


Everyday is a blank canvas, and only you hold the brush.
30y M traded in for a POM (pathetic Old Maid 46, 2 kids from different dads. never married)
S 11/11, D final 1/14.

Posts: 1454 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Suburbia, Arizona
kernel
♀ Member
Member # 27035
Default  Posted: 7:23 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((DTTC))) Just wow.


"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."

Posts: 5118 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Midwest
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 8:14 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That's just more proof of how crazy she truly is now.

(((dad)))


I'm sorry if you don't like my Honesty, but to be fair I don't like your lies.

Sometimes it's better to push someone away...not because you stopped loving them but because you can't take the pain anymore.


Posts: 13749 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 8:46 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

t/j

My ex got engaged to both OW within weeks of dating, before D's were even filed..

BOTH??

end t/j


xBW~ 35
Two of the most darling sons ~ 10 and 7

Posts: 2231 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
hurtbs
♀ Member
Member # 10866
Default  Posted: 9:37 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, his first "soul-mate." I discovered that A after a week and moved out. They were already talking of marriage. I do know it was a week because I found *all* of their emails - so I knew when it started/ended. We tried to reconcile.
Second A, before I filed he also proposed about two weeks after or so... maybe three?
That was the last OW. I don't know if they got married or not. I've heard conflicting information but haven't pursued it.


Me BW Him XSAWH
DDays 2006, and then numerous more
Divorced 2012

"In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate." - Asimov
"Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you." - Ovid


Posts: 15321 | Registered: Jun 2006
LifeIsBroken
♀ Member
Member # 27071
Default  Posted: 10:10 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

At least your xw waited till the D was final. My now-xh proposed to the bimbo 3 weeks after their sexting began, before they had ever met in person.... because 'you have touched my soul, you have said words I've never heard before.' Guess he forgot he was already married at the time. OH - and the bimbo forgot she was married, too. Strange how that happens; maybe just another phase of the alien invasion. The day WILL come when you don't care what she's doing. I hope she fails at getting more $ from you. Sounds like you've already paid more than your share in more ways than one.


BW: 59
XH: 60
Married 34 yrs, LIBerated: 2/17/11
MOW: 50 (she said she wanted a sugar daddy; xh said, "I'M HIM!")
Actions ALWAYS have consequences. Too bad cheaters don't consider the consequences BEFORE they create so much damage.

Posts: 482 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Missouri & Massachusetts
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 10:23 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, yes-- I'm waiting to hear about STBX's engagement any day now. He, of course, had to show my DD the ring... and we're not even officially D yet. Mine is behaving in the EXACT same way; I think the plan is for them to be married before the summer is out. The OW's also moving here from two hours away, and unless she's relinquishing custody of her kids to her XH (whom she must have either recently D or is not yet D from), she's bringing her two little kids with her to live with STBX. They're being forced to leave their home, their town, their schools, their friends so their mommy can marry a guy she met on Ashley Madison. Crazy train, indeed.

But yeah-- it's not our crazy. I'm also thankful for that.


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3596 | Registered: Oct 2011
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 10:43 PM, May 16th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Can't help it, another t/j

They're being forced to leave their home, their town, their schools, their friends so their mommy can marry a guy she met on Ashley Madison.

Oh, the irony THAT one is crashing and burning for sure..

AND

Guess he forgot he was already married at the time. OH - and the bimbo forgot she was married, too. Strange how that happens

end t/j


Cause marriage is sooooo special and meaningful to them right DTTC? Cause THIS time they truly found "the one" who completes their broken hearts? What a bunch of bull.. And it's the kids who suffer the most, and they've got no fucking clue.. But you even have "dad" in your username, so it's obvious where your priorities are. They are so very lucky to have you..

And don't worry bro, you ARE off the crazy train, now you just having to stop watching it

Oh, and tell her to take that 4K bill and shove it up her ass. FTB..


xBW~ 35
Two of the most darling sons ~ 10 and 7

Posts: 2231 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
bigpicture3236
♀ Member
Member # 27861
Default  Posted: 12:01 AM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Of course she did. That is what selfish people do.
It does make it harder, but you will be ok. Now is your time. Make the most of it and yourself. You deserve it.
Good luck.


If you love something and hurt it dearly, then chose not to fix it...you never deserved it in the first place.

Posts: 3603 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: Michigan
stronger08
♂ Member
Member # 16953
Default  Posted: 4:28 AM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bro do yourself a favor. Sit down, make some popcorn and watch the horror show thats sure to follow. Fuck her, dont give her another dime. The D is final and its hard if not impossible to get a modification after the fact. Her life is about to implode. She has chosen to enter a M with a confirmed cheat. And being one herself I cant help but laugh at what they both must be thinking. If you think any trust will be in that union your sadly mistaken. Personally I think they will both be in a rush to beat the other to the punch in the cheating department. Think of this as validation and redemption for you. Your rid of her cheating ass and she is now OM problem. Dude, I'll bet you my left leg that in a few months a good Karma story is going to be posted by you. Till then, enjoy the show my brother.


You cant eat soup with chopsticks.

Posts: 5653 | Registered: Nov 2007
wannabenormal
♀ Member
Member # 19772
Default  Posted: 4:42 AM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Of course they're engaged; it's to prove their love is real.

It may or may not self-destruct; my advice is to NOT sit around waiting for that to happen.

You have some closure with this 'engagement' - concentrate on your new life. Easier said than done though.

How are the kids with all this?

[This message edited by wannabenormal at 4:42 AM, May 17th (Friday)]



Posts: 14350 | Registered: Jun 2008
Dadtryingtocope
♂ Member
Member # 36726
Default  Posted: 6:54 AM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks all. I certainly won't sit around and wait for something to happen. But if something does, and according to statistics, it will, I will enjoy the downfall. She is nothing more than a cheating, lying, gold-digging bitch. I don't need to deal with her other than the kids and that is always contentious at this point.

She will not get any more money. She can take me to court and try and get it. I have proof there isn't anymore so good luck squeezing blood from that stone.

I can't wait for the day I don't care anymore. I still have anger and things like this certainly don't help. The continued selfishness is unbelieveable.

I have not talked to the kids about it. I'm sure since they have been around the two of them it is not a big deal to them. But when things go wrong, it could be a bigger deal.

I will just try and focus on my time with the kids doing what I can for them. When I have to deal with crazy bitch I will stick to NC. Just discuss kids needs and that is it.


BH me 46
WW her 38
DDay 8-17-12
2 kids (12, 9)
Filed for D 9/14/12
Divorced 4/17/13
She - engaged 5/13 married 9/13

Posts: 510 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: PA
SeanFLA
♂ Member
Member # 32380
Default  Posted: 7:23 AM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ask your friends to not tell you anything about her. I did and it really helped me detach.

Yeah this really helps too. I've had to lay that law down with my own mother too. She was constantly asking about my ex in-laws and ex brother-in- law. Just stupid stuff about them, how and what they were doing, etc. I finally kind of blew up on her and told her that..."I'm doing everything in my power to get over these people to move on and all you do is bring them up...I'm still not that strong yet so will you please stop with it already."

It wasn't until then do I think my mother realized the pain and personal battle I was really going through by myself. She's never had to endure this kind of pain herself so she just doesn't understand it. I even asked my close friends not to talk about her to me when they did. They respected that and have been pretty good about it since. I know it's hard to do, but try not to let her have any more of your head space. Strive for indifference. She's an adulteress and that's what she will always be, married or not.


BS(me) 48
WW 46
1 son 14 yrs old
Married 18 yrs, together 21 yrs

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." ~ Bob Marley


Posts: 1465 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: Zombie Land
Topic Posts: 23
Pages: 1 · 2

Return to Forum: Divorce/Separation Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.