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User Topic: In all honesty: do you have blinders when it comes t your child?
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 3:34 PM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think I might have blinders on so that I don't see my blinders!

However, right now DS17 is being a huge PITA and a smart ass. I don't feel anyone would want him for a son at this moment.

BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson

Posts: 9798 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
Hearthache again
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Member # 28564
Default  Posted: 4:55 PM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No blinders for me. My children are horrible some times. They are kids trying to figure out what they can and can't do.

Working with kids myself for many years, I do find parents over protective and they do not like anyone correcting their child but them. I currently am the director of preschool aged kids at our church and work with all children up to 5th grade. I have found that some parents do not want you to disciplined their child in class. They get all offensive when you tell them so and so had to go to time out.

Since working with children, I also correct children when they do stuff wrong outside of my class. I have been yelled at by a parent for telling their children to stop putting their dirty feet on clean towels. I didn't say please and thank you so I was in the wrong, not their child.

As for older kids, when I worked with teens I had a mother that her children could never do anything wrong. Sad thing was they were the worse behaved teens of them all.

All children a boogers. They are trying to figure this thing called life out. Its our jobs as parents and the community that surrounds them to help them to become good moral adults.

It takes a village not just a parent to raise well rounded children. To many people forget this.

[This message edited by Hearthache again at 4:59 PM, May 17th (Friday)]

Married-12 years together 13
Kids 4: 15, 12, 8, and 3
DDay#1 9-26-2008 Dday#2 4-26-2010
We have R!!! But I still hate the number 26!

This too shall pass
I edit a lot because that stupid box is so small!

Posts: 871 | Registered: May 2010 | From: Michigan
♀ Member
Member # 26651
Default  Posted: 6:31 PM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't have blinders on, but I also know my kids...if someone says they did something and my kid completely denies it (and is visibly disturbed by the accusation), I would believe my kid. This is especially true if it's another kid making an accusation. We've had a couple of scenario's this year where someone made claims about our oldest child doing something and come to find out, the other kid "forgot" part of the story and our son wasn't in the wrong. Our son was distraught until the REAL truth came out because he knew he didn't do anything. It went so far as us having to involve the school administration (b/c it happened at school and the other kid's parents weren't doing anything about it) before the other kid "remembered" the rest of the story.

My kids aren't like most...they behave well (for the most part). Usually, we are complimented on how well behaved they are, because we rarely have issues.

Me: FBW/30 Him: FWH/33 The kidlets: DS13, DS10, and DD8 The hounds: Four Shih Tzu's
Finally, completely R'd
Clothed in strength and dignity, with nothing to fear, she smiles when she thinks about the future.~Proverbs 31:25

Posts: 11584 | Registered: Dec 2009
♀ Member
Member # 25560
Default  Posted: 6:32 PM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It takes a village not just a parent to raise well rounded children. To many people forget this.

Amen to this.

As a teacher, I believe that parents know their kids better than I do. However, kids aren't always the same at home and at school. Teacher's aren't always perfect or as perceptive as they should be. Kids need to learn that not all teachers are going to be fair, and parents need to help kids be their own advocates, but be prepared to step in only when necessary...

Damn autocorrect is responsible for the silly errors, sorry!

Posts: 3653 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: In my head
Sad in AZ
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Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 7:13 PM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My DS's problem was that he was an only child raised almost exclusively with adults. He treated other adults (outside our extended family) like peers, so it got him in trouble sometimes. However, he also had a highly developed moral code, even as a child. His dream was to become a police officer (like his dad ) and he patterned his life to never get in trouble. It was a struggle sometimes, but he was very popular because of this, and was elected to student offices. He took his role in the community seriously. And he'll tell you straight out that he was raised by children

So, yes, I took his side more often than I did the teachers. We had a very mixed experience with teachers in Tucson; every other year he had a good one. I won't elaborate on the bad ones, but they were very bad.

[This message edited by Sad in AZ at 7:13 PM, May 17th (Friday)]

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20284 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
♀ Member
Member # 27035
Default  Posted: 7:48 PM, May 17th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I started out that way, but quickly learned to take things with a grain of salt. My kids are adults now, so I had lots of experiences of learning they weren't angels. I think it depends on the situation - there were some things I absolutely knew they wouldn't do and other things where I wasn't sure so would require some proof of innocence. It's such a crapshoot!!! They pull the wool over your eyes way more than you think - just ask them when they are adults!

"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."

Posts: 5243 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Midwest
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