Hugs to you friend. I was quite a bit older than you on my D-day.
I, like you, had a marriage everyone looked up to. It was a complete shock to our family, our friends, our community.
Before D-day I'd never balanced a checkbook, mowed the lawn, cleaned the gutters, taken the garbage out, or installed tracking programs on the computer. I learned, you can too.
Please don't let your previous dependence on him keep you tied to him. You can grow, you can change. Yes it takes time, you can do this.
As others have said, IC is important right now. You don't have to make any decisions today if you don't want to, just don't wallow for long.
And please don't have unprotected sex with him.