Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: si2day (45443)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Finally Divorced!
lostmommy
♀ Member
Member # 33440
Default  Posted: 10:44 AM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

After over a year and a half battle, my divorce was final on 4/10. He married OW on 4/20. Isn't that cute?!

I filed for bankruptcy as well and that was final on 5/10, and honestly I haven't felt this happy and free in a long time.

We still fight over visitation, mainly because he doesn't understand what's written in the agreement. I've suggested that he get a lawyer or take me back to court so we can get it spelled out for both of us, and of course he won't do either. So he just makes me out to be the bad guy. The issue at the moment is summer visitation - he's supposed to get 2 weeks non-consecutive in the summer, and what he asked for was 4, and a lot of that time piggybacked onto his regular visitation so I wouldn't see my toddler for 10+ days at a time...I said no. Proposed new dates that were fair, but because I didn't give him everything he wanted he took his toys and went home, and decided not to take him for anything other than his alternate weekends. But somehow that makes me the bad guy.

Anyway, I'm divorced, bankrupt, single, and happy as a pig in shit. I haven't felt this free in a very very long time. Time does indeed heal.


Me (BS): 32, Mommy to J: 2 1/2 Divorced: 4/10/13
Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself

Posts: 485 | Registered: Sep 2011 | From: NY
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:45 AM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm divorced, bankrupt, single, and happy as a pig in shit. I haven't felt this free in a very very long time.
What a wonderful perspective, lostmommy. Congrats on your new life.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25838 | Registered: Aug 2011
lostmommy
♀ Member
Member # 33440
Default  Posted: 10:46 AM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you!


Me (BS): 32, Mommy to J: 2 1/2 Divorced: 4/10/13
Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself

Posts: 485 | Registered: Sep 2011 | From: NY
Vulcanized
♀ Member
Member # 33523
Default  Posted: 11:02 AM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congrats & best of luck on your new life.


Me: MH 40s; Him: MH 40s (I had RA)
OW: 30s, moron; one of many
M: 8 yrs
3/13: D'd
-----------------------------------------------------------
Everything is as it should be.

Posts: 767 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Vulcania
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 1:16 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm happy for you-- glad that your D is final. Looks like your XH has about as much class as mine when it comes to how seriously they treat relationships.


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3623 | Registered: Oct 2011
jackie89
♀ Member
Member # 38271
Default  Posted: 1:21 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That's wonderful that you're feeling this way!

I'll be going through this starting in a couple of weeks, so you're giving me hope.. Thank You.


Separated/divorcing

"The Secret of Change is to focus all your energy - not on fighting the old, but on building the new" ~~Lori Greiner FB post~~


Posts: 521 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Pennsylvania
dmari
♀ Member
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 1:37 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Anyway, I'm divorced, bankrupt, single, and happy as a pig in shit. I haven't felt this free in a very very long time. Time does indeed heal.

Thank you for sharing!! I am loving the happy as a pig in shit comment!! Congratulations!


Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."

Posts: 2284 | Registered: Oct 2012
veelop5
♀ Member
Member # 11089
Default  Posted: 2:00 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How wonderful!!!! congrats!!!


ME-40
XH-DOESN'T MATTER ANYMORE
3 beautiful boys (21,20 & 17)
Update: Moved in to my own apartment 8/7/2012
10/27/2014-Met a wonderful man 9months ago
Divorce final 3/27/2013

Posts: 1098 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: Pennsylvania
scotslass
♀ Member
Member # 39204
Default  Posted: 2:48 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congrats......Congrats......Congrats...........oh by the way did I mention......Congrats!!!!!!


3 wonderful children (sometimes!!)
18 ds
16 dd
14 ds
Me. - moving on and upward !!!

Posts: 102 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Texas
persevere
♀ Member
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 3:16 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Great post!


Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling


Posts: 4618 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
lostmommy
♀ Member
Member # 33440
Default  Posted: 3:41 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you all! Being here helped (even though I haven't been around much lately) & having an amazing support group of friends and family helped.

For those that are just starting on this journey that we didn't want to go on - it's a rocky road through a dark tunnel, but you can and will come out on the other side.


Me (BS): 32, Mommy to J: 2 1/2 Divorced: 4/10/13
Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself

Posts: 485 | Registered: Sep 2011 | From: NY
Kajem
♀ Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 5:13 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations.

And welcome to your new life...

Hugs,

K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5326 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 5:18 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congrats! The feeling "free" part is what I'm looking forward to.


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ asurvivor

Posts: 2398 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
tesla
♀ Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 8:13 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4693 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
PurpleRose
♀ Member
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 8:20 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

oh I wanna be happy as a pig in shit!! Lucky girl - can't wait for that to be me!!


divorced the Dooosh
*****************************
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
~dodinsky

Posts: 3618 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
bigpicture3236
♀ Member
Member # 27861
Default  Posted: 9:24 PM, May 23rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I find it interesting that because he couldn't get what he wanted, he thinks he is punishing you now by not doing anything extra. How does he think giving you more time with your kids is a punishment???
Idiot!
I am so glad to see your attitude though. Keep it up and stay happy!


If you love something and hurt it dearly, then chose not to fix it...you never deserved it in the first place.

Posts: 3603 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: Michigan
homewrecked2011
♀ Member
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 3:26 AM, May 24th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Same problem here with first summer visitation..

XWH chose his 2 weeks, I set my vacation schedule around this. Then he says he can't get them those 2 weeks. Well, that is for you to figure out, DA....

Honestly, if he doesn't try to get them then, I will not say a word bc I really don't want my children with him and IT anyway!!


Keep Calm and Happy On!

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed


Posts: 2244 | Registered: Jan 2012
FaithFool
♀ Member
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 8:28 AM, May 24th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations! (except for the bankruptcy part.... ) He is an idiot.

[This message edited by FaithFool at 8:28 AM, May 24th (Friday)]


DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17589 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
lostmommy
♀ Member
Member # 33440
Default  Posted: 8:59 AM, May 24th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I find it interesting that because he couldn't get what he wanted, he thinks he is punishing you now by not doing anything extra. How does he think giving you more time with your kids is a punishment???
Idiot!
I am so glad to see your attitude though. Keep it up and stay happy!

Yeah, he's really punishing me by not taking his visitation. He has "headuphisass-itis". LOL

Thank you again everyone! As for the bankruptcy, although I didn't want to do it, it was a necessary evil. He wasn't keeping up his end of the bargain paying his half of our joint debts. I needed to protect myself and my son. So now I get to sit back and watch them go after him. Karma baby!


Me (BS): 32, Mommy to J: 2 1/2 Divorced: 4/10/13
Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere, you find yourself

Posts: 485 | Registered: Sep 2011 | From: NY
stronggirl72
♀ Member
Member # 37293
Default  Posted: 11:53 AM, May 24th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so happy for you, and your perspective on things gives me a lot of much needed hope.


"Taking the high road, and doing it with class."

DIVORCED!!


Posts: 155 | Registered: Oct 2012
Topic Posts: 21
Pages: 1 · 2

Return to Forum: Divorce/Separation Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.