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Uneek (original poster member #38416) posted at 8:13 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
It's something I keep thinking about and I'm wondering what others did.
Theunwilling ( member #38575) posted at 8:21 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
Yes. I had just had a baby and wanted to make sure he would be ok
Me: bw
Him: wh
Dday#1 12/1/12
Dday#2. 12/7/12
Dday#3. 1/24/13
TT. Throughout
R: 9 years.
A second chance is earned. Not deserved
rachelc ( member #30314) posted at 8:39 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
yes!!!
And he said they just kissed..
brokensunflower ( member #38674) posted at 8:42 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
no my husband had EA but it was out of state and she never touched him thank god I would of killed her... I belive him .. he didn't get that far
me 34
him 34
7 wonderful kids 14 yrs 10 yrs 7 yrs 6 yrs and 4 yrs 2yr ..and new baby
married 15years together for 12
my give a damn is busted
Emerald Eyes ( member #7977) posted at 8:43 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
Yes, it was time for my annual and when I told my doctor what had happened, he insisted, even though my H said they only kissed.
The doctor calmly told me that *I* was his patient and he didn't care what my H said.
MystiKay ( member #36401) posted at 9:02 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
No but I feel like I should. It might help with some of those lingering doubts, that is was only emotional. One was in person one was on line, so i have a little doubt.
stilltrying2025 ( member #39145) posted at 9:30 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
I have thought about it but haven't done it yet. I still might as we are separated and after the sick sexual text messages he sent my supposed "friend" last weekend I have no idea what he is thinking/doing.
Me: 38
WH: 43
DD: Thanksgiving Day, 2012
Status: Separated
stilltrying2025 ( member #39145) posted at 9:30 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
I have thought about it but haven't done it yet. I still might as we are separated and after the sick sexual text messages he sent my supposed "friend" last weekend I have no idea what he is thinking/doing.
Me: 38
WH: 43
DD: Thanksgiving Day, 2012
Status: Separated
Unagie ( member #37091) posted at 11:18 PM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
Yes. But there's something that rings untrue or missing about his story. Maybe I'm paranoid but I feel like I know a guilty conscience when I see one.
WakingFromADream ( member #33934) posted at 5:03 AM on Saturday, May 25th, 2013
Yes. I only have proof that there was a single kiss between the two of them but, there was ample opportunity for more. Since I don't know for sure either way, I felt it was safer to get it done.
Me(37) DS(9) DD 11/16/11 EA(PA?) M 11y D 9/3/13
Don't make anyone a priority when you are only an option.
purplebreeze ( member #31611) posted at 6:47 PM on Saturday, May 25th, 2013
No, because they lived in different states and they never were together.
I have seen no evidence of any other indiscretion in all the years together.
keeponkeepingon ( member #32935) posted at 7:05 PM on Saturday, May 25th, 2013
I did because I was told at the time of DDay that he had not slept with her yet. He kept that lie up for awhile.
He slept with the the first night they met. Even though she lived out of state they had been in a PA for some time.
"I know you and you know me and I know you can see. So help me get my way back to you"
ArkLaMiss ( member #14918) posted at 7:16 PM on Saturday, May 25th, 2013
Yes I did. How can you take that big of a risk? I wasn't taking any chances with regards to my health.
Just HOW stupid do you think I am, exactly?
metamorphisis ( member #12041) posted at 7:52 PM on Saturday, May 25th, 2013
I would advise that people do. For two reasons really. It's sadly very very common to minimize the details at first and it may be more than an EA. Also, with someone with a history of poor boundaries you can't know for sure that this was the first affair.
I know in my case, the story I first heard was that it was one time sex with a condom. Not even close to the reality of it sadly 
.
My d-day season was a shock and awe campaign where I got more information in agonizing detail. And as I discovered it wasn't that uncommon.
It is very possible that it was an EA only, however with your trust at zero you don't always want to be worrying about it in the back of your mind. I'd test if only for the peace of knowing I was ok.
Go softly my sweet friend. You will always be a part of who I am.
Althea ( member #37765) posted at 9:53 PM on Saturday, May 25th, 2013
On Dday I was told that my WH kissed OW once at his high school reunion and then they emailed after.
4 months later I was told that in addition to kissing, they met up a few weeks later at a friends apartment and were naked and had oral sex, oh and by the way, he had kissed two other EA years previously.
I'm sure there are some out there who get caught or confess after *just* an EA, but I wouldn't bet my health on it.
Taking it one day at a time.
tryin2havefaith ( member #37165) posted at 1:25 AM on Sunday, May 26th, 2013
My FWH tried to feed me the 'it was only an EA sandwich". I got tested immediately and i had gotten BV. We hadn't been 'together' for a couple of months due to my illness, and were together only once right before DDay. When confronted after dr gave me result, it was how I found out it was also a PA. Later on got positive result for HPV along with abnormal pap result . The A, the gift that keeps on giving 
It's your health. The WW has shown they were/are capable of deep lies. I say get tested even if they 'say' it was only this-or-that. Nothing is more important than our health.
ME- BS
HIM- WS
DDay 9/2011
G2HB
4-6 months of TT'ing
11/2012- Thanks for the HPV!!!
Fully R'd
"Just as ripples spread out when a single pebble is dropped into water, the actions of individuals can have far-reaching effects"-
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