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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: I had no idea I was so important to ex and OW
suckstobeme
♀ Member
Member # 30853
Default  Posted: 8:16 AM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That was sarcastic, but with a hint of genuineness.

I posted last week about the pot shots that ex assface was making toward me. The one that involes my true age - I tell the kids I'm 29 - is really sticking like a thorn in his side. It's getting stupid.

The kids came home last night and told me that the slunt's kids got into the mix and started yelling at my kids that 29 is not my real age, which they then kept blurting out. That means that ex and slunt have been talking about it in front of her kids.

I mean, honestly. Is it that big of a fucking deal? I only do it as a joke. Now it's become this bone of contention over there, almost like they fight about it. Wtf?

I thought life over there was such fireworks and rainbows. If that was the case, who the fuck would care what I say or do over here in my sad, lonely, pathetic little world???? Assholes.

[This message edited by suckstobeme at 8:17 AM, May 27th (Monday)]


BW - me
ExWH - "that one"
D - 2011
You get what you put in, and people get what they deserve.
Hard as it may be, try to never give the OP any of your power or head space.

Posts: 2495 | Registered: Jan 2011
Heavy Sigh
♀ Member
Member # 34243
Default  Posted: 9:25 AM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ahh.. it has begun. The unraveling. I'd give their relationship another four years, tops.

Conflict with the BS often binds a WS and OP in a common cause. When the BS removes himself/herself from conflict and interaction- it's one reason it's best to go No Contact other than kids' schedules - then the WS and OP must get to know each other.

In an affair, deciding which kind of sex to have and where to sneak away to meet, and getting intensely excited in the anticipation, is about all there is to the depth of some relationships, and when that sexual energy beings to wear off when there is nothing to anticipate but same-old sex at home, the illicit couple needs a binding agent.

It seems that your ex and his OP have already hit the stage where they must recreate the "monster" and fight it together to keep from falling apart. Battling you is all that they have in common.

This is why an angry and sad BS who says nothing and stays distant is preferable to a sad and angry BS who finds ways to lash out toward the illicit couple.

Tell your kids to laugh it off and do the roll eyes at them the next time they start up this stuff.

Her kids likely want to think of their mom as a good person and you as a bad person, and not think of their mom as a sexually available cheater who screwed a married man and hurt a nice woman. I feel sorry for all the kids in this situation. But it seems her kids need to demonize you, just as their mom and your ex, to justify all of this to themselves.

They may keep doing this to you for years, so I'd suggest getting one of those calendars that automatically emails reminders to all, and jot down all school events, plays etc., so they can't "blame" you for not still holding the social secretary part of the wife job for him.

[This message edited by Heavy Sigh at 10:04 AM, May 27th (Monday)]


Posts: 1917 | Registered: Dec 2011
Random thoughts
♀ Member
Member # 2959
Default  Posted: 10:33 AM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You're the glue holding them together, obviously they have nothing better to do then to gang up on you and out you about your real age.

Really pathetic when you think about it yrs later and your still the focus of their unhinged hatred.

Plus it tells that they are not happy because happy peeps don't need an out source to focus and base their relationship on.


Those three words are said too much and not enough.
Chasing Cars-Snow Patrol.
FWW

Posts: 1535 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Some where in New Jersey
gonnabe2016
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 10:41 AM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hope that YOUR kids looked at HER kids as if they were crazy to be going so nutso over something so silly......


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCyL6pa_L4M


Posts: 7239 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
suckstobeme
♀ Member
Member # 30853
Default  Posted: 12:30 PM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yup. I am one of those BS who say nothing. I am total NC except for kid issues. I'm not on FB or any other public social media aside from LinkedIn and that's all business. They know nothing about me and I say nothing about them. In fact, DS asked me recently if I hate OW. I told him no, I don't know her.

Honestly, this is why the small juvenile digs at me make me shake my head. I've done nothing. He wanted me to go away, so I did. I have my own money, my own home and my own career. He may have expected me to crumble the minute he left and is pissed off that i didnt.

They can have each other and I believe you are all correct when you say that their " togetherness" may not be all sunshine and roses. Talk about petty and stupid and unnecessary.


BW - me
ExWH - "that one"
D - 2011
You get what you put in, and people get what they deserve.
Hard as it may be, try to never give the OP any of your power or head space.

Posts: 2495 | Registered: Jan 2011
dmari
♀ Member
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 2:18 PM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

As if saying your 29 is the worst thing someone could do!! Hello??? Hmmm ... lying about age versus infidelity???

What a pathetic and boring couple!


Me (BS): 42 Children: DD 18, DS 15
I FINALLY GOT A COURT DATE: 5/29/14!!

Posts: 1830 | Registered: Oct 2012
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 6:03 PM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Your kids know its a joke, right?

What a stupid thing to get riled up about - everyone is right, these parasites need drama to make their lives interesting.

The sad clown recently confused my 5 year old by telling her that we were still married. Yes, its true but what the hell purpose does it serve to confuse her more? I had to try to explain the word 'technically' her.

I told her imagine if you went swimming and you dried yourself off everywhere except your big toe. Now imagine if someone said you were wet? Yes, its true because your big toe is still wet but you're not REALLY wet because its only your big toe.

I wonder if he told her this with OWUmpteen present - interesting that the fact that he was married didn't seem so important when he was fucking around but now on the road to D he is holding onto it for dear life. So pathetic - seriously, what losers.


Sending all of the love and strength I can muster to Phoenix1 and her family.
"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal."

Posts: 4511 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 7:45 PM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow... their relationship sounds AWESOME. Way to be incredibly lame!

I loved Heavy Sigh's response. Spot on. What better way to play "us against the world" than to try to find something about you to fixate on? And if that's all they got... then you're doing an awesome job. I hope that I can keep my cool so that STBX and the STBOwife only have the stupidest things on earth to say about me.

Seriously, it speaks to your classy character. They are really, truly desperate to find something about you to pick at. It's like making fun of you for your favorite color or because your like your coffee black. Looks like there's definitely trouble in paradise! Boo hoo!


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3387 | Registered: Oct 2011
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Maybe you could rehearse them on this: "My mom makes jokes that she's 29 years old and your mom jokes that she actually has morals. Hummmm, wonder which one is funnier?"


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4087 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Kajem
♀ Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 9:04 PM, May 27th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

^^^^^^^ THAT needs a spew alert!

I think you need to tell the kids it's the _____ of my 21st birthday.

Want to bet the dynamic duo can't figure it out?

I am glad your kids have you...

Hugs,

K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 4002 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Topic Posts: 10

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