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User Topic: How much money did your WS spend?
♀ Member
Member # 39134
Default  Posted: 7:28 PM, June 2nd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I once estimated that his first five year ....I don't know what to call it and I just started crying thinking that "affair" is too glamorous, too pretty of a word for it...his first decision to torture and tear apart my insides...cost about $100,000...
He controls most of our finances (he is an accountant) and I never knew a thing about what he was doing financially. Whenever I would ask, he would do the "you don't ever have to worry your pretty head" thing that I lovingly believed.

DD 1 - 7/7/2004
DD 2 - 10/31/2011
DD 3 - 4/30/2013(or continuation?)(Yes)
DD 4 - 9/25/2013
DD 5 - 2/15/2014 (found phone from 2009)

Posts: 496 | Registered: Apr 2013
♀ Member
Member # 27993
Default  Posted: 7:45 PM, June 2nd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We have a lot, too, BUT...

He gave OW a credit card so she could travel to meet when he was out of town on business, first class to Vegas, DC, London, New York, Philadelphia rinse and repeat.

Then, there were the designer gifts....and watch!

Add in The five star hotels and 300 dollar plus bottles of wine( dinners for two over 550)...

Adds up to way over 125,000!

But of course, my H said it was just for services rendered! Musta been some great sex!

Married 32 years
OW-Mr. Ed ish! Seriously!
DDAY- 2/21/09
TT until 1/10/10
Working on R and doing well!!

Posts: 179 | Registered: Mar 2010
♀ Member
Member # 36038
Default  Posted: 9:57 PM, June 2nd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wh and c***face were together physically for about 7 months, and in that time he spent a few thousand dollars on her. 6 weeks or so ago, I told him he owed me all the money he spent on her, and the money I'd spent on babysitters when I had to work and he was busy with her--I'd done some estimations and math--and today, he gave me a great big check.

He asked what I was going to do with the money, and I don't know. I think it would be best spent on us.

Me: 47
FWH: 40 (SI username: Bumbling)
DD: 11

DDay #1: June 9, 2012
Dday #2 (TT): November 29, 2012
DDay #3 (The BIG one, ALL the TT): March 30, 2013
False R: June 12, 2012 - March 21, 2013
REAL R: March 21, 2013 - present

Posts: 293 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Texas
♀ Member
Member # 39415
Default  Posted: 10:05 PM, June 2nd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would say he spent about $2K on a 3 month affair BUT we were actually talking today that it will end up costing us (assuming R) about $20K when you add in counseling and me "taking care of myself" (I have not been working and doing a good job taking care of myself)

Posts: 191 | Registered: Jun 2013
♀ Member
Member # 4956
Default  Posted: 3:16 AM, June 3rd (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was glad to see I am not the winner on this post. Isnt that sad. I feel bad for all of you.
Mine spent almost 100,000 on his (first) that I know of A several years back. Most of it was on dinners, booze and motels. And a 5,900 withdrawal that I suspect was a nice gift for her, a car.

And this past year he spent 16,000 in less than 4 months on WTF ever for he and his ho. The other 10 grand did go towards OUR bills BUT he withdrew 10,000 of my bond inheritance money. He called and transferred it to HIS account then had it wired to him. And I believe he spent around 35,000 the remainder of the year.
Sooo that equals 150 thou~! Not to mention the therapy bills and many other things..

And here my kids think they will get something from him when he dies LOL! He drained the savings and is now spending ALL of his income and letting me spend the rest of my inheritence to v=dover all of the bills. He is so nice like that.

He got SO pissed when he realized that all of the savings was gone! DUH! HE is the one who spent it all then figured out it was gone. What an idiot.

There is some in IRAS but not nearly as much as he spent of our savings.

And here he is "livid" because I got some inheritance and had it in my name as per attorneys instructions. And that's a good thing because that would all be gone to if he had control of it.

It will burn my ass to for the rest of my life. I did without most of h=my life to save it and boom add in a couple whores and its gone.

BS/60s WS/60s Divorcing and not soon enough~!
Its nice to be important, but its more important to be nice...

DD 6-14

Posts: 3104 | Registered: Jul 2004 | From: somewhere over the rainbow
♀ Member
Member # 33062
Default  Posted: 7:20 AM, June 3rd (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Probably 8 to 10k. Not sure, but when I was getting the discovery questions ready, and really dove in to his military and work "travel" schedule I was saddened (dates and locations confirmed with the other BS), and disgusted as to how he would travel to see the whore right before our weekend trips, and the weekend right before a big family cruise. Hell, for all I know the skank was there with us hiding her ample rump in the shadows...
I'm sure the Gov, and his civilian job covered a lot of their rooms and meals, but not all. Then there's the plane tickets, and all the hair dye he bought to try to not look like the old fart he is

Posts: 662 | Registered: Aug 2011
♀ Member
Member # 21183
Default  Posted: 9:39 PM, June 14th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My WH met the psycho OW on a telephone dating service. During the 2 year secret affair: He spent about $300,000 cash - and he ran up $77,000 Credit Card debt.
THEN, we incurred additional debt for therapist, MC...and legal fees when OW continually harrassed and we had to take her to COURT.
LOTS and LOTS of expense.

Me BS 59
WH 58
Married 19 years
D-Day Nov 3, 2005
Child: Adopted Daughter 21 College Student now

I can understand being alone; but I hate being with someone and feeling lonely.

Posts: 6150 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
♀ Member
Member # 35799
Default  Posted: 4:55 AM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My WH is a tightwad.

I don't think he was very generous finanically to them but his affairs have still cost us $$$

He resigned - supposedly with burnout and depression. Mostly affair related in retrospect. So only small amount of part time income for the first year and now only 20hours a week.

Post d-day I could only just hold things together at work so didn't do any overtime to compensate.

I also had to pay another semester of fees at university. Post D-day I was unable to focus and complete my thesis on time and had to get a semester extension.

Then the $$$$ we have spent on IC for each and MC.

Then extra doctor visit for anxiety and ADs and the STD screens etc

BS: 47 (me)
WH: 51
Married 26 yrs, 3 kids (16-24)
D-Days 2012: 23 - 24 May + TT
D-Day 2013: 12 Apr OW#3
mOW #1 EA yrs PA Feb 2009-end 2011
mOW #2 EA months PA 4 months 2010
OW #3 PA single time 2010
Status: Maybe 'R'

Posts: 728 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: "down-under"
♀ Member
Member # 36654
Default  Posted: 5:42 AM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

XWH#1 spent all of my Mother's inheritance (over 100,000) and the kids college money. Stupid me put it into a joint account I am not sure on exactly what he spent it on. OW left after I filed for D because his money was gone. He didn't work and was on false SSI. Since the D he has taken his parents for all of their money too.

WH#2- I am not sure how much he spent on OW over the 3yr LTA because we keep our money seperate (Yes, I did learn one thing from XWH#1). I know he bought her an engagement ring, nice dinners, hotels, etc..When I went to work out of state she lived in my home so they could save $$ on hotels since her grown kids lived with her. The month I found out I made him pay her part of the monthly bills plus his. I know of several porn movies, a new CD player, sex toys, viagra,vacations, etc. Now when he offers to pay for anything such as dinner out I let him. After DDay#1 he offered to buy me a cruise or pay off a student loan that I had taken out. I of course did not want anything from him and still don't. It cost me a fantastic job that paid very well and all my expense were paid by my employer. I have not been able to work since DDay#1 due to health issues and have went through my savings and checking. Just last week I had to break into my 401K just to pay my bills, something I always swore I would never do. I still have 6 weeks before I can look for a new job since I just had surgery this week. I am just glad that we didn't have a joint account.

M-9 yrs T-11 yrs
4 children-none together
DD#1-9/5/11 LTA 2yrs
DD#2-7/3/12 False R
DD#3-4/29/13 (OW broke NC)
Status: Your guess is as good as mine.

Posts: 2420 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
♀ Member
Member # 39415
Default  Posted: 7:11 AM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It may not be totally healthy BUT given that my WH spent $4000 in 3 months on dinners and alcohol for their 5 mid-week out of town 2 night rendezvous, and given that everyone has been telling me to take care of myself, I am spending at least that on ME and the people that have been loyal and loving throughout this. I also am taking off this summer (not such a big deal as I am a consultant) so we have lost income there too.

Posts: 191 | Registered: Jun 2013
♀ Member
Member # 28753
Default  Posted: 9:55 AM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Holy crap, y'all! I guess I'm lucky that Daffy's choice of AP was a cheap whore. He only spent $4000 in two years. Well, plus the cost of divorce.

BS & D
Drinking wine and thinking bliss is on the other side of this.

Posts: 2370 | Registered: Jun 2010 | From: Baby steps on my new path
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 1:13 PM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't know exactly. Even $.01 spent on any of the OW is way too much for me to stomach and pisses me off to just think about. He got so sneaky about it after I started jumping on his ass for spending money on the OW that he started trying to use hotel 'reward' points because he saw that as a way to *get around* my "stop spending $ on your whore" rule. Sneaky, grey-area dwelling fucker.

Nothing. OW paid for absolutely everything.
Apparently she was absent the day they discussed financial arrangements at whore school

^^^This is hilarious!!!

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

Posts: 8111 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
♀ Member
Member # 27090
Default  Posted: 6:33 PM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow, big hugs to all of you.

My H spent a lot of money on prostitutes, during years when we had very little and I was supporting him financially. This really rankles with me. My parents also gave him money to help with his overseas study. He still cannot explain how he managed to withdraw money without me noticing as I handled all the financial stuff. Urgh

FWW / BS (me)
FWH / BS (him)
In R ...

Posts: 85 | Registered: Jan 2010
♀ Member
Member # 35971
Default  Posted: 9:08 PM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


How much money did WS spend on MOW?

Directly: Maybe $25 on skype credit.

Indirectly, going out with her and her group of friends, he probably spent about $400 on drinks for himself and food bills split amongst a group. $100 on taxi fees to transport them.

Add another $2000 worth of alcohol he drank at home while skyping with her.

$200 on new underwear to impress her (similar to the infamous pair she bought him)

$600 in marriage counseling

Oh and then there is the fact that he got a marginal job review and no raise for that year. He was upset, but I pointed out it was damn good considering he was toasted or hung over the entire time AND spent most waking hours chatting with MOW. I have no idea when he really got work done.

Me - BS 40s
WH - 50s
4 Kids
Dday May 2012

Posts: 903 | Registered: Jun 2012
Topic Posts: 54
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