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User Topic: Residential treatment tomorrow - needing support
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Concerned  Posted: 6:35 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have posted before about my DD14 and her struggles, and about the residential treatment program that accepted her. The time has finally come - she will be admitted tomorrow morning.

Although I am awash in conflicting emotions, in my heart I know this is what she needs. And what DS and I need, too. We need help and support to get DD the treatment, skills, and strategies to make her day-to-day life manageable, and for us to learn to support her.

DD is scared, anxious, a little excited, and more than a little angry. She's a hot mess, to be completely honest, and I don't blame her. This is a big terrifying leap away from her safe zone and into the unknown. And it's all out of her control. She will be living at the treatment center for as long as it takes to get her on track. It could be for the summer, it could be for a year. There's no way to know right now. Uncertainty is DD's kryptonite. This girl thrives on the concrete, the plan, the schedule - the known. In some ways, I feel like I'm pushing her off a cliff. A necessary cliff, but still.

If you are so inclined, please shine some SI comfort on DD. And if you have some to spare, DS and I could use a little as well.


You can call me NIK

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.
- Plato


Posts: 24440 | Registered: Aug 2011
phmh
♀ Member
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 6:38 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((NIK & DD & DS)))

You've been such a supportive rock for so many of us here, that I hope you can receive the same support back from us. We're all here and rooting for you. I'm sure it will be tough, but, as you said, necessary. I know it will go well! But tons of love and hugs, anyway!


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. -Michelangelo


Posts: 3269 | Registered: Dec 2011
MovingUpward
♂ Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 6:41 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending mojo and prayers.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51523 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 6:57 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You know you're doing the right thing for all concerned. Be the mama bird and give that gentle but firm push.


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 19811 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Lucky2HaveMe
♀ Member
Member # 13333
Default  Posted: 7:08 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The right things are not necessarily the easy things to do. Wishing you all peace through this time of transition.

HUGS!


Indian wisdom says our lives are rivers. We are born somewhere small and quiet and we move toward a place we cannot see, but only imagine. From Tending Roses

Posts: 6025 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: WNY
Deeply Scared
♀ Administrator
Member # 2
Default  Posted: 7:34 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((NIK & DD))) Sending loving and healing thoughts to you...stay strong.


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.


Posts: 196533 | Registered: May 2002
abbycadabby
♀ Member
Member # 27428
Default  Posted: 8:06 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hugs to you all. I hope that she settles into a routine there and finds a new normal where she can thrive, and that she learns what she needs for when she eventually leaves the program.

Posts: 1212 | Registered: Feb 2010
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 8:07 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((NIKlet)))

(((NIK)))

I remember a few months ago you had a list of 4 or 5 things that needed to happen; this was a big one on that list. I'm glad things are moving forward, even if it's tough.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13568 | Registered: Jul 2011
jo2love
♀ Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 8:34 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Nik, DD, DS)))

Sending mojo, prayers, and positive thoughts.


Posts: 33943 | Registered: Mar 2011
TattoodChinaDoll
♀ Member
Member # 34602
Default  Posted: 8:37 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((NIK and family))))

The best thing isn't always the easiest. But you're a wonderful mom and person. Keep focused on the end results.


Me (BW): 32
WH: 33 TimeToManUp
Married: 10 years, together 16 years
3 daughters: 8, 5, 2, and and 2 angel babies (2013 and 2014)
D-Day: 12/21/2011
Confronted him: 12/22/2011

I'm getting out of here.


Posts: 1706 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: New Jersey
simplydevastated
♀ Member
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 8:43 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((HUGS))) to you and your family NIK. I can only imagine how difficult this will be for her and you, but as you said this is something she needs and will benefit from greatly.

You know we're all here for you and ready to listen and give you plenty of (((HUGS))) when you need them


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5839 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
gonnabe2016
♀ Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 8:46 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You are doing your *mom* job, which is not always easy.

My hope is that all 3 of you come through this experience much stronger people.

{{{NIK and family}}}


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7706 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
jrc1963
♀ Member
Member # 26531
Default  Posted: 8:50 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Parenting is the hardest job you will ever have.

You have all my support, admiration and love... You're doing the right thing for HER and for your family.

Keep that in mind...

(((NIK, DD and DS)))


Me: BSO - 45
Him: FWSO - 68
DS - 12
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

Posts: 24357 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
FaithFool
♀ Member
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 8:54 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending both of you lots of courage and strength.

((NIK))


DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17171 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
ajsmom
♀ Member
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 8:58 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending it all your way.

AJ's MOM


Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!


Posts: 21032 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
veritas
♀ Member
Member # 3525
Default  Posted: 9:09 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((nik))) hugs and mojo


Actions unmask what words disguise.
Love many; trust few; and always paddle your own canoe.
When you win, you teach; when you lose, you learn.

Posts: 10168 | Registered: Feb 2004
metamorphisis
♀ Administrator
Member # 12041
Default  Posted: 9:14 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sending all of you hugs and mojo. Tomorrow is a scary day for you all but hopefully things are only getting better from here on out



“We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are.”... Anais Nin

Posts: 43990 | Registered: Sep 2006
KeepCalm_CarryOn
♀ Member
Member # 33374
Default  Posted: 9:24 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((NIK and family))))


You are not dealing with rational people or situations. Normal thought processes won't work...story of my life.

Me- BW, 28
Him- fWh, 34
Mostly R'd, minus a few scars...bought a house and got a puppy...And baby makes 3! She arrived August


Posts: 1989 | Registered: Sep 2011
TrulyReconciled
♂ Member
Member # 3031
Default  Posted: 10:27 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((Comfort)))))


"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

Posts: 20933 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Hell and back, way back :o)
solus sto
♀ Member
Member # 30989
Default  Posted: 11:02 AM, May 30th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

MILLIONS of hugs to you.


BS-me, 52
WH (Trac-fone), 52, PD
2 kids-DD25, DS18
multiple d-days
DIVORCING
Alone, most strangely, I live on~Rupert Brooke

Posts: 8342 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: midwest
Topic Posts: 85
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