You've had Juki. It didn't help.

So, screw that. Here are the facts: you're abusive. You minimize it. You focus on her and like the mask of being contrite.

No one buys it.

You're an adult, right? You're familiar with expenses and lawyers and having to do things in a legal context, in a responsible context, without focusing on how she's supposed to facilitate it, yes?

Put up or shut up, Saz. People have tried to help. You're just digging the prestige. Prove that there is substance behind your conflict.

Actions. Not words. Try it out.

Sorry but its true. You are kinda scaring me with the way the post is sounding. Do not do harm to your self or your wife.
Go to the hospital or somewhere so you can talk to someone I know there are crisis lines in the phone books.

NC means NC. She called the cops, good she needs to feel safe and you sure as hell are not giving it to her. I'm not sure how you read through all these responses and still don't try to follow any of the advice.

Do you fucking get that? Have you ever been assaulted? Have you ever had a gun pointed at you, or a knife wielded? Have you even been hit?

Well, I have, and it isn't a calm, let's-talk-about-finances feeling the next day.

It's a I-hate-you-and-I-never-want-to-see-you-again feeling.

Juki gave you chance after chance. MORE chances than she should have. (first time in years that I've used that barfy smiley because it grosses me out)

You deal with 'your' finances, and I assume she'll deal with hers. And believe me, she could care less about your JOB, or your finances right now. She just wants to get away from YOU.

She gave you chance after chance. You TT after TT. She thought you loved her. That you would be willing to do the work. THAT'S why she was going to leave the car and drive home. Because she thought you would GET it. That you might realize the chance you had been given...to be a couple again.

Either you aren't capable, or you (mistakenly) think she's buying into your BS. She's not, and neither are the hideous meanies who post on the WW side.

Either way, she's gone.

PLEASE leave her alone. She has requested NO CONTACT from you. What was your reaction to that? You sent her some sort of creepy message about her car windows being down. Don't you GET how scary that must have been for her? She must have felt like her abuser was stalking her.

I have to tell you the truth; if someone did to me what you did to your wife? They'd be in jail for a very long time. So.........she gave you a chance (multiple) because she loved you. You lied. You failed. You scared the shit out of her and now she's done (I hope).

Please work on YOU. You are not a safe person.

People start over every day financially. Go bankrupt. Get a new job if you lose this one, (and I have my doubts about you threatening that constantly).

If you really want your wife back, you have a long road ahead. YEARS. It might take years for her to even speak to you again. That might happen only if you become 'safe' (and if she doesn't move on).

Okay. My whole post was not very supportive. I guess I'll live with it.

Edited to fix pronouns.

[This message edited by FinallyHappy at 6:04 AM, June 5th (Wednesday)]

Actually, the BS's have been quite mild and polite.

The people who have asked questions, etc, are mostly Waywards. As am I.

I'm missing something, aren't I?

Not sure what you mean?