There has been one big sign. He "liked" two sexy pictures of women on his twitter account (that he uses for business, but post a lot of personal pictures). He didn't like their non sexy photos, at least the few I looked at. He later said his friend had his phone one day and he must have "liked" the women.
Then we had a big argument where I told him I can't do this anymore but also about the boundaries that we had about female associates. He told me that he didn't think he could stop being social and talking to women (casually). That turned into me not understanding what he meant. When women are talking to him at work, he thought I wanted him to walk away rudely. Well I don't, but if I did, why the F** not? Anyway, the gist of my argument was that you would take a bullet for me and your kids, but you won't be rude to women? Which he realized sounded crazy, so he put it back on me, like he couldn't possibly be saying that because it doesn't make sense. He also feels like he doesn't go out anymore, hinting that he was feeling boxed in. But when we dug deeper into that, it became very clear to him that I don't stop him from going out. There are lots of things him and the fellas can do that do not include going to a night club or a strip club. So I don't know if he is going through his own phase of post affair, and we shld try MC again or if he is prepping to cheat and these are my signs.
I think I would go back to MC and take a harder line with him. He's not getting it, or he doesn't want to get it.
"It's hard to be in love when you can't tell lies!
I think this starts coming a certain time period out, where they feel that the marriage should be fully recovered from the infidelity. Like "so what if I liked a woman's butt on twitter? So what if I flirted a little bit with a woman- it was at work! I can't be rude!" And then you point out that it isn't just so what, because he does have a history of infidelity, and he acts like you're "still" on it. I deal with it all the time.
Hold your ground and watch him closely.
At least the current man "only" cyber-cheated.
"Love means never having to say you're sorry."