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Newest Member: utterlydone (44718)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Are you single or divorced???
Shockleader
♂ Member
Member # 36827
Default  Posted: 10:13 AM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So many forms, questionnaires, etc have the bullseye with these choices, and I'm curious how/when/why you folks answer, even if there is no benefit/detriment by your answer?

I'm guessing some of it is situational, perhaps some legal at very specific instances... Thanks, and single works for me.


D-Day spring 2012
Me BS 47
Xcheater 44
One DD 19
Married 23 years
Divorced 12/23/13 Fu*king A!

The cruel, the unkind, those without honor, feast on the tender heart...


Posts: 652 | Registered: Sep 2012
roughroadahead
♀ Member
Member # 36060
Target  Posted: 10:22 AM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If "separated" is an option, I choose that. If I was D, I would choose that. If there's no "separated", I'm stuck with "married", because I am still technically M until D is final. Not single, though, because on forms where they give divorced as an option, single is "never married".

Edit: that didn't need a target

[This message edited by roughroadahead at 10:28 AM, June 1st (Saturday)]


BS-Me 30s
WS-Him 30s
D-Day 4/2012 (Insisted EA only)
D-Day 5/2012 (Did I say EA? Ummm..)
Numerous other TT/broken NC d-days until S 1/2013. D settled 11/2013
MOW-coworker, 40s.
2 DS and DD all w/autism

Posts: 728 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: USA
phmh
♀ Member
Member # 34146
Default  Posted: 10:34 AM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If there is no legal reason, I put single. It just makes me happier :)


Me: BW, divorced, now fabulous and happy!

Married: 11 years, no kids

The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark. -Michelangelo


Posts: 3315 | Registered: Dec 2011
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 10:35 AM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I believe in honesty and accuracy. If there is a choice that includes single and divorced, I would choose divorced. I was married; I am now divorced. Single, to me, indicates you were never married. I have nothing to hide.


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20027 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
inconnu
♀ Member
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 11:12 AM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm with SiA. I have no problems checking the divorced box. But I do check the "Ms." box now, instead of the "Mrs." It just seems weird to be called Mrs Lastname now, since I kept my married name but I'm not married to ex anymore.


Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect


Posts: 12144 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: TX
Happydays
♂ Member
Member # 38681
Default  Posted: 1:43 PM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I choose "Divorce".
I hate it when the other options appear: did you pay alimony?
How much CS?


BH 33
FWW 32
DS: 3 year old.
Dday 10/14/2012
No remorse so:
Divorced 02/15/2013. No alimony, no CS, got apartment. Won all battles and mind games off the courts.

Posts: 294 | Registered: Mar 2013
Ashland13
♀ Member
Member # 38378
Default  Posted: 3:57 PM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I put "separated", as the divorce is not final.

And I put "Ms", though I loathe it.

I feel too old for "Miss" and don't like that, either!

People are starting to refer to me as "Ms" or just my name and it's surreal. Sometimes I don't reply because I don't know it's me!

Yes, single is a good one and very new, too!


Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington


Posts: 2204 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: New England
kernel
♀ Member
Member # 27035
Default  Posted: 8:19 PM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have always put divorced. I have been contemplating starting to put single - probably because I am finally thinking about dating. When I was cringing at the very thought of dating, "divorced" seemed like a layer of protection. Weird how my mind works, I know.


"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% - and that's pretty good."

Posts: 5058 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Midwest
Griefstricken25
♀ Member
Member # 29183
Default  Posted: 8:49 PM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

On legal forms, I put divorced. On anything else, I'm single.


Me!
3 amazing kidlets
To WXH "Now you're just somebody that I used to know." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9NF2edxy-M
D-day and separation - June, 2009
Divorced - December, 2011

Posts: 2507 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: A better place
Nature_Girl
♀ Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 9:49 PM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm still married (dammit), so that's what I check. Unless Separated is an option, then I check that. When the time comes I don't think I'll have any issues checking Divorced. After all, that's the truth, and considering how hard I've worked to accomplish that status, and how much money it's cost to attain it, last thing I'll do is deny it!


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9529 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Kajem
♀ Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 10:23 PM, June 1st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I check divorced. I opt for Ms. although some of my kids friends still call me Mrs. lastname. good thing XH's NW wasn't around.. she does not like that we have the same name. Oh well, sucks to not be the original.

Hugs,

K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5014 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 8:03 AM, June 2nd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh well, sucks to not be the original.

I made my lawyer spit his coffee with this one: "Everybody knows sequels are nowhere near as awesome as the original!".


Buzz- The word you are searching for is 'Space-Ranger.'
Woody- The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there are Pre-school toys here.

Posts: 5535 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 5:41 PM, June 2nd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I choose separated for now if that's an option. If not, then I pick divorced. I'm still not actually divorced, but "stuck in separation/divorce limbo" isn't a choice!


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3575 | Registered: Oct 2011
peridot
♀ Member
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 6:46 PM, June 2nd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

During the divorce I was either seperated or married because I was not single or divorced yet. I put myself as single except for legal documents. Then I am divorced.


I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.


Posts: 4751 | Registered: Feb 2008
Lola2kids
♀ Member
Member # 32789
Default  Posted: 8:03 AM, June 3rd (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We were common law so I put single sometimes since I was never married.

I guess I fall into the perpetually separated category.

It occurred to me that I don't have that final piece of paper to show that it's over. It keeps me in limbo a bit.

Anyone else have this problem?


BS: (Me) 47
Kids: twins DD(10)
WS: Him 49 (Together 12 years)
D-Day April 18, 2011, Him:out Sept. 11, 2011..moved June 27, 2014.
"They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder but I am growing more and more fond of his absence"

Posts: 1364 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Ontario, Canada
Topic Posts: 15

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