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Newest Member: leftfordust (44208)

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User Topic: triggers out of the blue
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 11:10 AM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yesterday I played hookey from work. I never do that but decided I was taking the day to do what I love, painting.

I took the time the day before to get ready, new paints, brushes, canvas, dug my easel out of the basement.

7am outside, beautiful day, feeling so good, I am reclaiming a part of me. Painting away, feeling inspired, then I looked at something on my easel, it's always been there and it never entered my mind before. I haven't painted since before dday.

The logo on my easel is ow's name! I had a manor melt down. This is mine! I carved it out of the wood with a knife. It is so hard when things get you when you are not expecting it. It made me so angry so sad. Sapped all my creativity.

I will not let this stop me, shopping for a new easel.

It just floored me as to how sensitive I have become to every tiny reminder. It was just a little too ironic, I have used this easel for 10 plus years and that one detail never imprinted on my mind. I knew it was there, had seen it but now such a small little word can crush me.


Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

divorcing


Posts: 1233 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
somanyyears
♂ Member
Member # 26970
Default  Posted: 11:35 AM, June 6th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


..((((ca)))))

..

I will not let this stop me,

..i think the majority of us trigger on so many little things in life that pop up when we least expect them.

..it's how we handle them that counts.

..get back to the painting you love.. it's the best way to fight against those f'n triggers!

smy


trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Me 67
Her 63
Married 42 yrs (together 47)
18 yr LTA with bf


Posts: 4099 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: the sad state of affairs
Topic Posts: 2

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