His marriage was brief. He deployed before his son was born, then returned from Afghanistan to a multi-cheating wife (of the Craigslist-ad variety). They separated immediately.
Parental alienation has been a HUGE part of the equation.
This is a guy I've known since he was a kid. He is sweet---but, since his deployment, depressed. He has been prescribed meds for this---and needs them. When he takes them, he copes very well with the traumas he's experienced.
His divorce attorney believes that there is a strong case for him to gain custody--at least half time. The conditions in which his child lives are abysmal, making full custody realistic.
His divorce attorney is kind of an idiot. He offhandedly mentioned that it might be "look better to the judge" if SIL stopped taking his meds. This good---albeit depressed --man who returned from war to find his life HERE imploded--is now white-knuckling without meds, at HUGE personal cost.
Never mind that it's not SAFE to abruptly stop meds.
With meds, he can work constructively toward recovery from the traumas he's experienced, and be a great father. NO ONE would EVER suggest that a father returning from war to an intact family stop his meds---but this lawyer's thinking aloud is, IMO, reducing the odds of gaining custody of this little boy who NEEDS a stable home.
Can you please share your experiences with me? It seems to me that the need for antidepressants would not be even a blip on a judge's radar. If I were a judge--and obviously I'm not---I'd be far more concerned about noncompliance with a prescribed regimen. Am I completely off the mark?
In my case, EXW tried to use my use of AD's against me. My lawyer simply asked EXW "who wouldn't be depressed going through D with a cheating spouse?" Really pissed her off because it brought her cheating back into focus rather than the AD's.
BTW I got custody. She fought that all the way to the state supreme court. It can be done with competent legal representation.
There is no shame or stigma on this any longer. You know what's funny? My lawyer was stunned to learn a few weeks ago that I am NOT on AD meds. All this time he just assumed I was having chemical help to cope with this calamity.
Guy has a MEDICAL ISSUE that he is dealing with in consultation with A DOCTOR and RESPONSIBLY following the doctor's orders. WTF is so hard to understand about that???
I hope this gets straightened out before he LOSES custody because he is not taking his PRESCRIBED MEDICATION!!!!!!!
That lawyer is an idiot.
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous