I did not think I could ever hate him more than I do right now. My kids have done without so much because he refuses to help more than the minimum amount he can get away with. They spend virtually no time with him because he makes no effort to see them. This trip is a once in a lifetime opportunity and I am so mad that he cannot just be an adult and do something nice for once. He has absolutely no concern about her going out of the country, he just wants to be an asshole because he can. I hate, hate, hate him!!!
Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson
Another possibility, although I'm not sure it would work in your case, is to fill out the section on 'special circumstances' on the parental consent form explaining why you cannot get consent from the other parent.
Anyway, WHAT A FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!!!!
((((daisy & DD))))
WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.
I had this put into my divorce decree; since my parents live in Europe and I usually travel with the kids to visit them twice a year, I wanted this irconclad.
Good luck to you and your daughter.
He is currently on 5 years deferred/suspended sentence for conviction of stealing credit cards and using them. If he breaks the law, he could be sent to prison. He regularly violates his probation (has been caught once). I could probably get him in trouble with his probation officer, but I have to carefully consider that because if he goes to prison, he won't be able to pay the measly child support he pays now. I'm going to give it a few days. My DD already said if he refuses that she will never speak to him again.
^^what everyone else says. Asshat.
I'm sorry. I hope you are able to figure out a way for DD to go. What a once in a lifetime opportunity!
I think you and DD are just going to have to forgo this trip because he is being an ass. The good news is that when she is 16 she no longer needs her parents in order to get a passport (at least that is my understanding in the US).
Your X just shot himself in the foot wrt his relationship with your DD. He is being petty and stupid and she is old enough to see that for herself.
What an ass!!
She's fortunate to have one stable loving parent. She will remember that forever, too.
He says to her that she does nothing for him, so why should he do anything for her.
Her dad is a horrible man.
In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie
[This message edited by SeanFLA at 11:06 AM, June 9th (Sunday)]
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." ~ Bob Marley
What I learned is, the other parent does not actually have to go to the passport facility. There is a special consent form that he can sign giving you permission to apply for her passport by yourself. He does have to have it notarized, though. There are usually public notaries in local banks, etc. Some employers have a notary on-site.
If you filled out the form for him, would he be willing to sign it in front of a notary? It's much less hassle than going down to the passport application office. The only other thing he has to do is photocopy his ID and have the notary sign that, too.
We did this, and it worked fine. The form is called DS 3053, or "Statement of Consent."
I hope he consents to sign the form and your daughter gets to go on the trip.
[This message edited by daisy 37 at 2:40 PM, June 9th (Sunday)]
The suggestion I'm about to make is a little devious, but desperate times deserve desperate measures.
What if you and your daughters were to make a campaign of extra special niceness toward your selfish XH (who definitely has issues) until the passport application has been safely submitted? Would that make him more likely to sign the form?
It wouldn't be lying, exactly. It would just entail the three of you being careful not to provoke or antagonize your XH for however many days the passport paperwork would take.
Don't think of it as subterfuge. Think of it as diplomacy, LOL! Or, alternatively, as practice in how to get along with difficult people.
[This message edited by josie11 at 6:27 PM, June 9th (Sunday)]