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User Topic: Spouses/Partners of Sex Addicts-11
DrivingPast
♀ Member
Member # 32984
Default  Posted: 5:25 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

For those of you who have gone through this--- how many times or how long did the confession period last?

My situation might be a little unique in that we were separated at the time of dday and that provided some emotional separation as well. I didnt really think I was coming back but I wanted to know the truth. So I was able to be calm and patient mostly. I let him tell me slowly and didnt push(which is not my character, lol).

I had come to visit for the weekend. I confronted him with unused condoms in the car. He almost immediately started confessing. So the whole weekend went with slow confessions, but all were minimized. During that week(while still separated) he told me a few more things, and gave me his emails and passwords. Then he told me I knew "everything" but his idea of everything and mine are different. He (claims)told me of all the incidents in which he met people(the numbers). But the details were omitted or minimized or lied about(like hand job was really a bj). The last trickle truth I got was around 2-3 months in. One thing I will give him is that most admissions were not things I had any proof of, and many Ive been able to verify.

Due to tt, I will never believe I have the "whole story".

ETA: the calm and patient only lasted until the first tt/lie was found out. Then I became an obsessive lunatic questioner. I cant stand lies!

ETA also add... his 'number of incidents' has never changed

[This message edited by DrivingPast at 8:04 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)]


BW
married more than 10 yrs to a possible SA
D-Day May 5 2011
"Because one knows people best through their fears - the ones they overcome and the ones they are overcome by."

Posts: 1304 | Registered: Aug 2011
jzkc1502
Member
Member # 40496
Default  Posted: 5:41 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My DDay was 3 years ago, August 2010. The only truths I have are what I've been able to prove, and he's never offered up any information on his own.

We have a MC appointment tomorrow. In my heart, I want a D. I'm really going tomorrow in hopes perhaps I can get some kind of full disclosure from him, although I know he's going to try and keep us together.

God this is awful. I wish I left 3 years ago when this happened.


Me: BS 29
Him: WH 28
Together: 9 years, married 3
DDay: August 2010
OW: Escorts/Craigslist (escorts and strip club on our honeymoon!)
Status: Divorcing

Posts: 139 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: NJ
RippedSoul
♀ Member
Member # 40055
Default  Posted: 6:42 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm actually so sad our little group is growing--not because I resent newcomers (I've not been on this thread very long myself) but because it means so many more people are walking a mile in our shoes. :(

This whole disclosure thing sounds like it varies a lot but includes lots of minimizing and half-truths and distortions and lies. Right? When I first confronted my husband with proof (a condom receipt, bank records for $200 withdrawal the same day and copies of the e-mails to a prostitute), he told me he'd gone but her place reeked of cigarette smoke and pet urine, so he left the money and the condoms there and left. Since he came home (I only found this out afterward, of course), e-mailed me at work to tell me he'd worked just a half-day (when he'd not been there at all), and asked me out to lunch when I got off (I only work part-time), this seemed believable to me. Horrible, still, but believable. And I truly believe it was the FIRST time--21 years after our vows. I suspected (because I saw money withdrawn from our account when he was on business trips) that he was doing more on travel, but had nothing for proof, so . . . When HE decided he wanted to, he confessed to the affair (about which I knew nothing), the prostitute (the whole story), and the two escorts while on travel.

For about 5 or 6 months, he was devoted and kind (not his MO). Then he started acting out again. This time, he confessed nothing. This time, I had to prove everything. And I'm getting good. But I don't want to be his watchdog.

He was very angry that I was taking away his AP (with whom he was no longer physical--she ended it--but with whom he still corresponded daily). He felt that since he wasn't being physical or sexual with her, she could be his friend. I am NOT a hollerer or a screamer; I do not rage; I do not swear--ever. But I told him--when I showed him photos of his texts to her--that I refused to have three in our marriage, that I absolutely LOATHED her, that his having a relationship of any kind with his cumdumpster (yes, his jaw dropped) was absolutely and completely and totally unacceptable.

Because he was angry, he phoned another escort. He was sober enough, though, to realize we really, really have no money and that he really, really could do nothing about it. When I showed him I'd found her on his "prostitute" phone (the one we--his family--were forced to use), he was livid. But he agreed to transfer us back to his work phone and to get rid of the extra phone.

And he finally gave me his passwords to classified work computers. I spent that night checking everything on them. Of course, he'd already cleaned them. But I can look at them at anytime they're not with him. I also got the passwords to his little notebook computer that he uses for his dirty stuff--stuff that can't be done on a classified computer.

Once he calmed down a day or so later, he initiated more concessions. He suggested that he put a GPS tracker in his car so that I can know where he's been. He spent hours setting that up (rewriting code for my computer to accept it) and then taught me how to use it. He asked for NC sample letters and let me watch him send it to her. He has been loving and affectionate and helpful. He appears to be transparent (who knows?). He's joined us for family activities he didn't want to do but was a good sport about it anyway.

He's shared some truth--that part of his shame is that I deserve so much more than him. I responded (how does one honestly respond to that without shaming an addict more?) with two things: first, it was MY choice to decide who I deserved and did not deserve; second, I DID deserve to have a husband who wasn't acting out.

In other news, I think I've found my potential S-Anon sponsor. She struck me as sponsor-material the first meeting; this last meeting, she definitely seemed to be the one. Not sure how to go about asking her, though. Does one just call up and ask? How that could scare me after all I've been through is crazy to me, but it is. Like I need to be rejected again, huh?


BW: 49
SAWH: 46
M: 22.5 yrs
TT: Nov 12-Jan 13
DD: 20; DD: 18; DS: 16; DS: 14

Posts: 312 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: California
Issaquah
♀ Member
Member # 34484
Default  Posted: 7:09 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In other news, I think I've found my potential S-Anon sponsor. She struck me as sponsor-material the first meeting; this last meeting, she definitely seemed to be the one. Not sure how to go about asking her, though. Does one just call up and ask? How that could scare me after all I've been through is crazy to me, but it is. Like I need to be rejected again, huh?

You can first ask her if she has been a sponsor and if she is taking sponsees to start the conversation. I think with the answers you receive you will know if you feel comfortable asking her if she would be open to be your sponsor. Part of the recovery process is open communication, healthy boundaries, and giving back to the recovery community. Even if she is not available to be s sponsor I don't think she will reject you in the way that you might be fearful of.

Regarding confession or disclosure: I have not had a therapeutic disclosure with my SA. He has told me I know everything, but I think there's more. We just started meeting with the CSAT for MC and I will be bringing that up in our next session. I have had a ton of TT, even when he has TT to help me feel better and it has been painful. I think that a one time event would be much better than small disclosures over a period of time.


BS - Me, 41 SAHM back in grad school
WS - Husband, 43 SA dx in March 2013
T-20, M-18 college sweethearts
Multiple DDays since 1999 - OW's all the way back to engagement
Most recent DDay 8-12,false R 1/13
DD-11, DS 13 with ASD

Posts: 776 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Virginia
cds22
♀ Member
Member # 39083
Default  Posted: 7:44 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Newcomers, I am sorry I can't respond to everyone individually. But I am hoping for the best for each of you during this terrible and shocking time.

Issaquah, you asked about when you should start pushing your H to attend meetings and therapy. My view is that you come up with your boundaries -- for example, one of my own boundaries is that we separate if H is not going to SA meetings weekly, actively engaging with his sponsor, and going to weekly csat therapy. But I have never reminded or nagged him. I told him my boundary and if it wasn't respected he would have to leave.

I think if you push him you are never going to have faith in his recovery and his ability to stay sober. At least that is what I tell myself as it can be surprisingly hard to step back from managing the SA's care.


Posts: 210 | Registered: Apr 2013
SpaceJane
♀ Member
Member # 40303
Default  Posted: 12:05 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi everyone,
So much activity over the weekend and so many new people, this is so sad. It's Iike suddenly everyone uncovered something :(

Cds22- I read your post about being so detached from your H that you don't know if you love him anymore, and I feel the same way, however I don't know if it's detachment or just a phase in this whole ordeal (for me).I have not worked on detachment, I don't even know how I would go about that, but I just feel so disenchanted and I often wonder if I still love him. I looked up to him so much and now I see him in such a different way, he is not the man I loved so dearly. I had pure love for him. I know for a fact that I don't love him the same way, I don't have that fearless love and that I would do anything for him, hell no, I'm scared to love him. I haven't told him I love him since this happened, because the truth is I don't know. He also has been working hard to get better, has done almost everything I have asked of him like therapy and stuff, and he has stepped up a lot in terms of taking care of the house and things like that, but I don't know if it will ever be enough. How can it be enough? There is just so much damage I don't know if anything will ever be enough to make me feel better. Anyway, how do you know, or I should say, how do I know, that I am detached vs "disenchanted"? Sometimes I feel like I don't care at all what he does or doesn't do, and other times I stress about it so much.


Me BS: 29
SAWH: 29
M: 3yrs ; T: 12yrs
DDay1: 8/11/13 confessed to tip of the iceberg.
DDay2: 8/26/13 Found secret email, 7 yrs of CL casual encounters, dating websites, massage parlors, etc.

Posts: 61 | Registered: Aug 2013
Missymomma
♀ Member
Member # 36988
Default  Posted: 2:16 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi laides. This thread has been growing, I have a feeling after CH does a TV show concerning SA, that it will be even busier.

Issaquah - Sorry that you are in this place with your SAWH. My SAWH and I have been in the same boat recently, fortunately I have had the support of my IC and our MC. I just told him that this marriage wasn't going to work out if he isn't doing his recovery work. He has a treatment plan and isn't following it. With his new CSAT, he starts next week, I am going to have us all draft up a contract regarding treatment, meetings and sponsor. He had an agreement with his previous CSAT but that CSAT (an ego maniac) wouldn't work with the other ones to get everyone on the same page. So do you have your own CSAT? Does he have his own and then a separate one for MC? Perhaps you can bring a list of boundaries that you and your CSAT have worked on to MC? Seems it isn't that uncommon for SAs to not want to do the deep work and drag their feet in recovery. Hang in there! Do you have IRL support?

RS - So glad you have found your S-Annon sponsor. Sorry for the relapse, sounds like you are handling it well. Hope your SAWH is working a program, has a sponsor and a CSAT. We are getting so big that I can't recall all of the details for everyone. Maybe we should put it in our signature line. Like CSAT, SA, sponsor and for us CSAT, cosa, sponsor, just to let people know what is going on in our lives without stating it every time.

As for the detachment versus distancing, I struggle with that one myself. Sometimes I think I am detaching, when I am really distancing. It is a hard balance for me to find, so I totally get what you are saying. I think when we are first learning to detach we do more distancing but as we practice, it becomes more detachment. Hey, progress not perfection.

AFM, home with a sick kid and I have it too. SAWH is coming home tonight, it has been good and bad having him gone. So, hopefully things will continue to go well.


DDay - 6/15/11
R started - 7/1/11
False Discl- 9/27/12
Real Discl - 2/12/13
Poly - 3/1/13 Pass!
Me - BS (46)
WH - 52 (SA, NA, WA)
Kids: 2 littles and 1 grown
The road to recovery is long and hard. Some days I am up for it and others not!

Posts: 1084 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Texas
outtanowhere
♀ Member
Member # 39001
Default  Posted: 3:47 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This whole concept is something that has eluded me from the very beginning. It seems contradictory to be a true, loving partner yet, at the same time, a completely separate entity. The relationship in it's truest form demands patience, kindness, selflessness, sacrifice, trust, humility to honor that person you love. I know now that I took that way more seriously than my SAWF did since he has shown me everything opposite of what I held to be true. So much so, that here I am today.

I understand individuality but, the way I have always understood marriage is two people committed to living life together. A union of two people, each one willing to promote the well being of the other. How can you be committed to creating a healty relationship without giving up some of your "rights".

My SIL told me not so long ago that his view of marriage is this. The reason you marry is because you love someone so passionately that your purpose in life is to serve them. I liked that he felt that way, especially because he is married to my daughter But, I guess, that's what I thought it was supposed to be too. Maybe that's idealistic or just expecting too much from a mere mortal but, I don't think so.

I made a committment and I have stayed true to it. I've been far from perfect but, I have tried my dead level best to please an unpleasable man. Insane. So, now I find myself in a postition to reverse my thinking and focus on me. I'm finding it extremely hard to differentiate. I keep looking for that "on/off" switch but, I haven't found it yet. Maybe I have a dimmer knob instead.


BS - 57
SAWH - 60 multiple encounters with prostitutes and other sex workers
Married 36 years
Dday - 2/19/13 - found the emails
I'm not crazy I'm just a little unwell

Posts: 495 | Registered: Apr 2013
marlie2014
♀ Member
Member # 40981
Default  Posted: 3:59 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi everyone, thought I'd post although there's little to update. I'm having a colposcopy done today since WS gave me the two types of HPV that cause cervical cancer. He plans on going with me. I can count one one hand the number of times he's gone with me to the doctor since we've been married, so I can only assume that he's going with me out of extreme guilt.

Yesterday my therapist said that he believes WS wants to move out because he doesn't want to face the pain and suffering that I am feeling. Similar to me this weekend packing up all of our pictures and his love notes and putting them in our son's room (he's not living with us now that he's 18) where I didn't have to look at them. The IC said, "He wants to put YOU away because looking at you suffering because of him and being with you hurts so much. He wants to get away from it, not face it."

I told him this when I got home from my appointment, and tears began to roll down his cheeks. Nonetheless, he's still going ahead with his moving plans. At this point, I feel impatient...sort of like, 'If you're going to leave, then do it already and stop hanging around.' Once I realized there was little hope and that reconciliation would take a miracle, I stopped feeling so conflicted. Just impatient to begin the next phase and move on. I don't know if that makes any sense, since I of course still love WS and wish he would get help.

Maybe I'm not living each day in horrific pain because he's still unemployed, but when he gets some $$$ then I'll go back to feeling like my guts are being scraped out of me with a spoon? I've been going around the past few days feeling like I'm fine, but I'll still cry at the drop of a hat any time I talk about things either with friends or with WS.


BS: 33
WS: 35 and definitely SA
Married: 9 years
1 stepchild, now 18 years old
DDay: 9/2/2013
ONS: Multiples over a 5-year period, at least twenty
1 OC and another on the way
Filed for divorce!

Posts: 158 | Registered: Oct 2013
scaredyKat
♀ Member
Member # 25560
Default  Posted: 5:26 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Marlie)) My colposcopy was a bad day for me, and would not have been necessary had I known my SAFWH had been physical with his whore. Here's hoping it all is fine for you.

Love. That's a $20,000 question. In my case, the question is probably worth more, as SAFWH's hobbies ran into six digits. Do I still love him? "Normal" married love changes much, I'm told, in the course of a "normal" marriage, and I, for one, thought I had that, thought I was experiencing that. I fell in love, experienced the infatuation, then the let down, then the reality. I always thought I had a realistic "love" for my SAFWH, recognizing his faults and weaknesses, loving him in spite of/because of them. He's "quirky" with an ADD/maybe Asperger's personality, it's infuriating or endearing depending on your point of view/mood. I did a lot of self talk to convince myself that his "quirks" were just that, and not personality "flaws" even when those behaviors resulted in verbal or emotional abuse toward me.

For instance, he'd be late. REALLY late. Hours. And "forget" to call. Now, I realize he was probably at a strip club or bar. I convinced myself that his "forgetfulness" was part of his "quirkiness" and it wasn't my right to demand he be as anal as I when it came to being on time, or even when it came to basic consideration and courtesy. Of course, he was always courteous and considerate of his whores and sluts, but I didn't know that then.

The issue of not calling when late is just one example. Throughout this, I truly loved him. I thought. I know now I was co-dependent, so afraid of being alone I allowed myself to be abused. He had job conflicts and losses, was working on two master's degrees, pursuing a neglected musical hobby, a sailing hobby, and of course his addiction. Each time I thought I'd had enough abuse, disrespect, he'd have a crisis and I'd think I would have to stay around to support him. Of course, it wasn't a two-way street. My crisises weren't met with the same empathy. If I was feeling down, or discouraged he'd snarl "your FEELINGS!? I'm sick and tired of hearing about YOUR feelings!" Why on earth did I allow that? It's clear that I was as sick as he was.

I managed everything else. Two high-maintenance kids and all their hobbies and school work, the house and its needs and upkeep, a second master's degree, a successful career change and full time job as well as the budget and an increasingly abusive and absent husband. He'd show up on weekends to participate with the kids and pat himself on the back for his good fatherly behavior. I was a shrew, a nag, an imposition.

I don't think he loved me at all during those years. His POV is that he did in his sane moment. Those moments of sanity became fewer and fewer.

And now? He says he loves me, always did, but was too sick to realize it. He didn't let me go when he was chasing OW because in some dark recess of his mind, his love lived, and he knew that if he lost me, he'd lose that tenuous grip on reality and wholesomeness that kept him grounded.

Do I love him? I do. I don't want to day I-love-him-but-I'm-not-in-love-with-him. That feeling of being "in love" died in me along with my sexuality. I doubt if I will ever feel "in love."

Missy-as usual, you are wise. I must think long and hard about your distinction between distancing and detaching.


Me-BS-59
HIM-SAFWH-63
Damn autocorrect is responsible for the silly errors, sorry!

Posts: 2924 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: In my head
seriously2many
♀ New Member
Member # 38979
Default  Posted: 6:08 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Distancing and Detaching. I also struggle with the difference between the two. It's such a hard concept when your life has been intertwined with someone else's for so long.

I look forward to reading others thoughts on this topic.

Thinking of all of you and holding you all in the light.


Me - 41 - IC, S-Anon
WH - 39 - Hasn't chosen recovery
M - 16 years, 2 teenage children
Dday1 - 9/6/05 (separated 10 months)
Dday 2 - 6/20/06
Dday 3 TT from Jan. 2013 - May 2013
He moved out 4/8/13
Status: Separated and in limbo

Posts: 9 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Texas
ChoosingHope
♀ Member
Member # 33606
Default  Posted: 8:48 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi laides. This thread has been growing, I have a feeling after CH does a TV show concerning SA, that it will be even busier.

Oh no, not me. They would have to put me in a witness protection program afterwards.

I'm already threatened with a federal lawsuit for telling my story to my immediate family and a few close friends.


Posts: 1433 | Registered: Oct 2011
SpaceJane
♀ Member
Member # 40303
Default  Posted: 9:08 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

First a movie and now a show? Why is this becoming so popular? I wonder if it's because people are suddenly realizing that these behaviors are not normal? Also with the surge and ease that the internet provides for cheating I shouldn't be surprised that so many are coming out
At first I wanted to see the movie (Thanks for sharing) until I saw the trailer and I just started to cry, too many triggers for me so I didn't. Maybe in a few years.


Me BS: 29
SAWH: 29
M: 3yrs ; T: 12yrs
DDay1: 8/11/13 confessed to tip of the iceberg.
DDay2: 8/26/13 Found secret email, 7 yrs of CL casual encounters, dating websites, massage parlors, etc.

Posts: 61 | Registered: Aug 2013
outtanowhere
♀ Member
Member # 39001
Default  Posted: 9:23 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I missed it somewhere. Movie?


BS - 57
SAWH - 60 multiple encounters with prostitutes and other sex workers
Married 36 years
Dday - 2/19/13 - found the emails
I'm not crazy I'm just a little unwell

Posts: 495 | Registered: Apr 2013
scaredyKat
♀ Member
Member # 25560
Default  Posted: 9:38 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In general there is mention of a talk show that will feature an interview with Samantha Baker. November 5. Brave soul, she.
Movie?


Me-BS-59
HIM-SAFWH-63
Damn autocorrect is responsible for the silly errors, sorry!

Posts: 2924 | Registered: Sep 2009 | From: In my head
womaninflux
♀ Member
Member # 39667
Default  Posted: 9:55 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The movie is "Shame" I believe. It had Michael Fassbender (sex addict) and Carrie Mulligan (love addict). I did not see it but I saw clips of it in reference to a talk by SA/LA "experts" (Alexandra Kahakis sp?; Ethlie ____ and one other person as well as actual SA Anonymous/LA Anonymous members (they were behind a screen and I think their voices were altered.You can google it. Pretty interesting.


BS - mid-40's
SAWH - mid 40's
Kids - 2 elementary school aged
Getting tons of therapy and trying to "work it out"

Posts: 809 | Registered: Jun 2013
SpaceJane
♀ Member
Member # 40303
Default  Posted: 10:38 PM, October 23rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't know about "shame", but the movie I'm talking about is called "thanks for sharing" it has gwyneth Paltrow in it and was just in the theaters a few weeks ago, might still be out, but not a lot of theaters had it.


Me BS: 29
SAWH: 29
M: 3yrs ; T: 12yrs
DDay1: 8/11/13 confessed to tip of the iceberg.
DDay2: 8/26/13 Found secret email, 7 yrs of CL casual encounters, dating websites, massage parlors, etc.

Posts: 61 | Registered: Aug 2013
numbandnauseous
♀ Member
Member # 34525
Default  Posted: 12:10 AM, October 24th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

"Thanks for Sharing" is the movie the CSAT for our women's group recommended that we see. It was good and focused on recovery: 12 step, sponsors, etc. I had to close my eyes during parts of it (an SA having sex with a prostitute) and there were people in the theatre who obviously didn't have a connection with SA because they laughed at the parts when the guys were masturbating to porn (so painful for an SA spouse to watch!)

I think "Shame" is darker and may be harder to watch. There is also one called "Don Jon" with Scarlett Johanson; she meets a porn addict, discovers his addiction, and it is supposed to be about how they try to build intimacy.

I want to post so much more, but I need to get to bed. Welcome newbies; thanks veterans and not-so-newbies; I relate to so much on here and am grateful for all the sage advice given.

Holding you all in the *LIGHT*

Edited for clarity.

[This message edited by numbandnauseous at 12:15 AM, October 24th (Thursday)]


BS (me) - 41
WH - 48, EA with HS GF x 2
M: 10 years, T: 20
2 small children
DDay#1 - Christmas 2011 (OW#1)
Confronted - 4/6/12
DDay#2 - July 9, 2012 (OW#2)
He is an SA (Oct 2012)
Divorcing

Posts: 827 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: the other side
outtanowhere
♀ Member
Member # 39001
Default  Posted: 7:49 AM, October 24th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG! I'm very curious about what it would look like from a producer's point of view however, I wonder just how glamorous it can be made. I watched the trailor for "Thanks For Sharing". I saw a man rolling in the sheets with a women in a bed from what looked like the Ritz Carlton. I wonder if they have any scenes that include seedy hotels and nasty strip bars. Should be interesting but, I'm not sure I have the stamina right now to be able to sit through it.


BS - 57
SAWH - 60 multiple encounters with prostitutes and other sex workers
Married 36 years
Dday - 2/19/13 - found the emails
I'm not crazy I'm just a little unwell

Posts: 495 | Registered: Apr 2013
hathnofury
♀ Member
Member # 32550
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, October 24th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The ladies from my group therapy that saw "thanks for sharing" said that it was very realistic, painful for BS to watch, probably not good for an actual SA to watch unless they are really far into recovery because of explicit scenes of acting out. I have not seen it.


BS 43, SAWH 38. M 15years, together 17. Body count in the triple digits. Both in recovery, trying to R.
Three kids under age 11.

Posts: 1408 | Registered: Jun 2011
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