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New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Online dating guy responded. Need another translation please....
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
DOH!  Posted: 10:09 AM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is what I sent to him when he asked when we could meet:

I might be open to meeting up eventually.....I just prefer to get to know someone a little bit more. You never told me what your favorite places were! :-) What are you looking for on this site?

Here was his response:
Jun 9, 2013 Ė 11:46pm

Yeah of course...we should definitely text and chat before we meet. Ummm...I'm not too picky, anywhere that has tasty food. I am looking for a good relationship that will last. I don't out a ton so this is a good way to meet people. I hope you are looking for the same.

Thoughts on this....

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 10:10 AM, June 10th (Monday)]


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
LostandGuilty
♂ Member
Member # 30493
Default  Posted: 10:25 AM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My thoughts are that he wanted to meet you in person, but understands your hesitancy. He seemed to have answered your questions. His favorite places are restaurants with tasty food. His intentions are to meet a woman for a lasting relationship. I do not see any secret meaning to anything in his response.


"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on" - Robert Frost

BH (35)
DS (15)
DD (13)


Posts: 224 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: FL
turned123
♂ Member
Member # 33663
Default  Posted: 10:27 AM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The response seems 'hurried' to me. I would have spent some time answering your question about my favorites, doesnt everyone have some??? I think I would have added something about myself and then ask something about you. Have you ever been scuba diving??? something!
Just my two cents.

GOD LUCK!!!


me BS 48
her WW 45
married 15 years
divorced
3 wonderful but hurt kids

Posts: 334 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: milwaukee
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 10:39 AM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Has he actually told you ANYTHING about himself yet?


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13690 | Registered: Jul 2011
Oh the Irony
Member
Member # 12354
Default  Posted: 10:51 AM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just sounds boring and wishy-washy to me. There is nothing engaging there--nothing that would draw me in and make me interested in meeting.


Two gorgeous boys, 14 and 8.
D-day Sept. 15, 2006.
Me, BS 43
Him, WS 50
Her, OG (Guess she is 27 or 28 now! 19-21 at the time...)
Separated. Divorcing. Happily working on myself.

Posts: 735 | Registered: Oct 2006 | From: thankful for truth
jennie160
♀ Member
Member # 29949
Default  Posted: 10:58 AM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In your first post about this guy I thought that "places" was more along the lines of locations to travel not places to eat. Ignore me if I'm wrong but if I'm right I would take this as him not caring enough to even remember what we were talking about.

Has he actually told you ANYTHING about himself yet?

I have to second Ama on this. It sound like he is trying to just tell you what you want to hear.


Posts: 921 | Registered: Oct 2010
Take2
♀ Member
Member # 23890
Default  Posted: 11:46 AM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Assuming this response is indicative of the level of effort he puts into a relationship - I'd pass.


"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?

Posts: 4112 | Registered: May 2009 | From: New England
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 12:00 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah...I gave him a nice long response to his question...because it was SO vague! He asked me what my favorite places were and I said that I had LOTS of favorite places such as the greenway because I'm an avid runner..and then I spouted off lots of restaurants that I love but also told him my aversion to sushi because I can't seem to stomach it... as a warning if he is a sushi lover in case that is a deal breaker for him... and told him about my secret love of horror movies... and tried to cover as many "favorites" as I could but that is such a broad topic that I could talk for hours on things I love to do!!!

Then I HAD to ask him for his name...

His response was.... "My name is Daniel... and I love sushi btw"

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 12:00 PM, June 10th (Monday)]


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 12:00 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Following what Jennie said, I'd guess this guy is messaging with literally dozens of girls. Seriously. Too little detail, too little effort, too generic of responses - he can't keep everyone straight, doesn't have the energy to invest in anyone, just hoping to hit the "date" stage with minimal input.

Nothing is inherently wrong with a "shotgun" approach, but it's not very successful IME, and the "quantity" detracts from the "quality" in a big way.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13690 | Registered: Jul 2011
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 12:02 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree Amazonia... and I'm a good catch IMO... I think a guy SHOULD put in a little effort and get to know me! I mean....I'm willing to do the same! Its only fair!!

[This message edited by She11ybeanz at 12:02 PM, June 10th (Monday)]


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
better4me
♀ Member
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 12:33 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

my 2 cents...some people just don't like to talk on line and don't come across as "interested" because of it. Maybe he is typing from his phone and that can be frustrating to try to write long responses. This weekend I met someone in person who had come across wonderfully on line (well thought out responses, good questions to me and great responses to my questions). He was less than stellar in person. You never know...

And it is okay to say "meh" and go on to the next person regarding this guy. If you think there was something intriguing about the guy from what you saw on his profile, I'd meet. If not...nothing wrong with moving on...

On line is just a way of meeting someone, you don't know what they are really like until you spend some time with them.


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52
Divorced

Posts: 3096 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Betrayal
♀ Member
Member # 9898
Default  Posted: 1:59 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Following what Jennie said, I'd guess this guy is messaging with literally dozens of girls. Seriously. Too little detail, too little effort, too generic of responses - he can't keep everyone straight, doesn't have the energy to invest in anyone, just hoping to hit the "date" stage with minimal input.

Agree 100%.


Me,38 BS
Divorced
Married
DS Born 9/6/10

Posts: 2220 | Registered: Feb 2006 | From: IL
MyVoice
♀ Member
Member # 35695
Default  Posted: 4:42 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree sounds like he's online busy and perhaps a little jaded by many long winded exchanges that fell flat on their face first meeting.

You've got nothing to lose, why not express to him,in a fun manner, exactly what you have on here?


Me:BW 46, Him:WH 50
two kids DD14 and DS17
Married 26 years
OW 28, crew member (he was the ships captain)
"People are formed by their actions, not their ideals" unknown

Posts: 470 | Registered: May 2012 | From: Australia
I.will.survive
♀ Member
Member # 34677
Default  Posted: 6:18 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Could be any of these reasons! Maybe he is on his phone, maybe he's courting multiple possibilities (and nothing wrong with that at this stage) and maybe he's just not great at writing and would rather have conversations in person.

I fell for my guy literally from his writing though. So I'm kind of partial to getting a longer winded answer than what you've gotten!


Posts: 530 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: east coast
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 7:39 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

See....that's how I feel! If a guy takes the time to talk to me....and really get to know me WITHOUT seeing me....gives me a glimpse of who he really is... then it makes me WANT to meet him! Ya know! Guys that send me one-liner answers are a dime a dozen...


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
HappilyUnMarried
♀ Member
Member # 21299
Default  Posted: 9:02 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Really, if you are not ready to actually meet him, then maybe a chat on the phone now would be in order? In my opinion, he hasn't given you anything to say "yes" or "no" to yet.


True happiness comes from within, not from someone else.† Donít make the mistake of waiting on someone or something to come along and make you happy

Posts: 1291 | Registered: Oct 2008
She11ybeanz
♀ Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 9:17 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

URG....so I check my email and he left me a message saying "If I wanted to text him I could... and gave me his phone number..." But, to be honest....texting is almost more impresonal than email IMO cause I can't write as much on text.....or it takes longer...

I noticed he specified text. Grrr..... I'm hesitant...because the last time I gave a guy my phone number he started sending me half naked pictures and asking if he can come over to my house late at night (before he even met me!!!) And, that guy actually talked to me a little more than this one has....

This guy is obviously used to relying on his pretty face to see him through.... been there done that.


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2717 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
Topic Posts: 17

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