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Took Teslet to the beach this evening and he started playing with another kid. Eventually the kid's little brother toddled over and sat by me and the mom followed. We had a really nice conversation...not something that I would have done before because I probably wouldn't have even been out at the beach back when I was with ex-shat.

Anyway, I have a question...I feel a little silly even asking it. Sometimes I feel so clueless. The kids really hit it off and we were talking for quite a while. She owns a restaraunt and as she left she said to email the restaraunt and let her know the next time I'm up at the beach and maybe she can bring her kiddos again.

This is normal right? This is what people do and how they interact, right? I should do this, right? Why do I have no idea how normal people interact? How sad is it that this was an incredibly novel experience for me?

Yes, it's nice and normal. Email her and arrange a play date for the kids with coffee for you and her.

I'm glad you had a pleasant encounter. You deserve it!

Yes, honey - it's what normal people do. Or so I've heard.

And boy do I get that question. You have no idea how far off normal your life has gotten until you step off the crazy train.

Oh honey. Yes it's normal. I was surprised when it started happening too. The mummy books don't tell you thr you've joined a secret and elite club. Most don't realise until this child reaches social age.

I met a mum at the park once and our chat turned into laughing about how you know you're a mum when adults tell you they have a stomach ache and you ask them if they need to poo (or at least WANT to ask them).

Do you belong to any playgroups/mothers groups? Here they set us up with one within the first few weeks after our babies are born. I've also made friends with lots of daycare and school mums. We catch up with kids and also nights out.

They have been a great support to me throughout the years.

I love the sisterhood!!

Yep! Normal and great. I've made many of my best friends through activities I was doing with my children. You have a lot in common because your children are at the same stage.

Some friends stayed around while others were just for a time. My children are now in college and I'm still friends with people I met because of the kids 17 years ago.

Yes very normal !

I met my best friend (RIP Nancee) when her DS and DD went to preschool together. 35 yrs ago. We were long distant at times but we so close.

Gma

[This message edited by gma56 at 2:51 AM, June 12th (Wednesday)]

I don't blame you for questioning if this is normal.

I am so wary of what other people do I wonder about their motives they must be evil right? Even if is something nice I question their motives. Left over battle scars I guess from the xwh.

I think it sounds like she was trying to make a friend

It is normal and you should be happy about it.

Making friends through your kids happens all the time.

Tesla, you are just wonderful to say the least!

Sounds like you may have made a new friend

Not only is this normal, but as Teslet gets older you're going to find it's a life-saver. Parenting books which assure you the kid's various emotional tantrums, etc., are "normal" are cold comfort. What parents need is what you're experiencing: someone to sit their butt down next to yours, hand you a margarita, and rant with you about What In The Hell Has Happened To My Wonderful Little Child.

Go get some free business cards from Vistaprint.com (they have Vistaprint's logo o the back but big whoop!) and design them as playdate cards. Have them printed with your name and Teslet's, and put your phone and email address on them. I did this years ago when Birdie Sue was a toddler and I've re-ordered every time we had a baby. You'll be so thankful you've got those. Trust me.

You have no idea how far off normal your life has gotten until you step off the crazy train.

Word ^^^

I think that's wonderful.

When my kids were little bitties i intentionlly went to parks, pools, story hours to meet other moms with kids the same ages,

Made lots of new friends that way, for the kids and me.

Go get some free business cards from Vistaprint.com (they have Vistaprint's logo o the back but big whoop!) and design them as playdate cards. Have them printed with your name and Teslet's, and put your phone and email address on them. I did this years ago when Birdie Sue was a toddler and I've re-ordered every time we had a baby. You'll be so thankful you've got those. Trust me.

This is golden. I ordered what I call "mom cards" as soon as I kicked STBX out of the house last year. Like you, Tesla, I had/have no idea what is normal for how adults socialize, especially parents/other moms. I still don't, but I'm working on it. I hand people my card all the time now. At first I just had a stack in my hand as I went door-to-door in my own neighborhood, introducing/reintroducing myself to people I'd lived next to for over a decade but hadn't really seen thanks to the isolation from being married to a raging NPD SA. I pass them out at church, at school functions, kid activities, anytime else that I'm talking to a mom and it seems like she's fairly friendly and decent. People are overwhelmingly in favor of these little mom cards, they make an impression.