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User Topic: Would an anti anxiety drug help me...
loveisareddress
♀ Member
Member # 36474
Default  Posted: 4:36 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

with constant nausea, racing thoughts, increasing heart rate and blood pressure from severe stress of being here?

I will never be able to acquire or hold down a job in this state of mind.

I can't leave until I have a job.


Scorched earth-Like Peter the Great, he burns up his own territory in order to gain the upper hand while his own people suffer.

I don't need you to be happy. I just need you to leave me alone when I am.


Posts: 442 | Registered: Aug 2012
njgal480
♀ Member
Member # 24938
Default  Posted: 4:38 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It helped me in the first few months after d-day.
Have you gone to see a doctor? and/or a IC?


Me- BS
Him- WH
Long term marriage
D-day- Jan. 2007
5 yr. LTA
Reconciled.


Posts: 3163 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: NJ
loveisareddress
♀ Member
Member # 36474
Default  Posted: 4:40 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I left a message with my endocrinologist.

Don't need IC. I'm not the one who has issues, he is.

IC will only give him something else to use against me.


Scorched earth-Like Peter the Great, he burns up his own territory in order to gain the upper hand while his own people suffer.

I don't need you to be happy. I just need you to leave me alone when I am.


Posts: 442 | Registered: Aug 2012
EasyDoesIt
♀ Member
Member # 29514
Default  Posted: 4:40 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Xanax was a lifesaver for me and I was on a low dose, but it took the edge off. It sounds like you're having panic attacks. I've also taken Zoloft and, at one time, Paxil. Both are good meds for me. Go and see your doctor and explain the situation.


Anything less than full disclosure and total transparency is pure bullshit. WARNING! No emotional pollution allowed.

Posts: 3698 | Registered: Sep 2010 | From: Georgia
Tripletrouble
♀ Member
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 4:42 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Lexapro and Xanax for emergencies have allowed me to function at work, as well as to sleep and generally get through the day.


40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013

Be happy with what you have while you work for what you want - Hellen Keller


Posts: 638 | Registered: May 2013
EasyDoesIt
♀ Member
Member # 29514
Default  Posted: 4:44 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I left a message with my endocrinologist.
Don't need IC. I'm not the one who has issues, he is.

IC will only give him something else to use against me.

Please reconsider this position. #1, ANYONE would have difficulty coping with the tragedy of betrayal. #2, My IC gave me tools to deal with the panic attacks and they worked wonderfully. It helped me come off of the Xanax., and #3, maybe you do have issues and that's why you're with someone who cheats on you (Personally, I have so many FOO issues that I'm a bad picker, seriously, I consistently pick assholes). I'm not saying it to hurt you, and I'm surely not saying that it's your fault you were cheated on, but it doesn't hurt to get another perspective and talk to a professional who can help put things in order in your head. <hugs> Infidelity is brutal and it sucks. It is a trauma. No one should be expected to go through it without some sort of support system.


Anything less than full disclosure and total transparency is pure bullshit. WARNING! No emotional pollution allowed.

Posts: 3698 | Registered: Sep 2010 | From: Georgia
solus sto
♀ Member
Member # 30989
Default  Posted: 4:51 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm not sure an endocrinologist is the doctor to see for psychiatric meds.

But yes, I think an antianxiety agent, perhaps in concert with an antidepressant (many of which also address anxiety) would be helpful.

As for IC "giving him something to use against me," he can really only do so with your consent. There is nothing maladaptive or negative about seeking counsel when betrayed. If you're battling anxiety, meds are a short-term solution; new coping tools are a long-term solution. IC can help you gather those tools.


BS-me, 52
WH (Trac-fone), 53, PD
2 kids-DD25, DS18
multiple d-days
DIVORCING
Alone, most strangely, I live on~Rupert Brooke

Posts: 8844 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: midwest
loveisareddress
♀ Member
Member # 36474
Default  Posted: 4:52 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

At this point, betrayal is nothing.

He is abusive.

I need to get out.

He is broken.

I can't fix him.

I can try and fix myself and get out while I'm still young enough to have some sort of a life.

I don't need IC to understand this.

I do need to manage my emotions and stress so I can start being pro active instead of stuck in this fear and stress induced inertia.


Scorched earth-Like Peter the Great, he burns up his own territory in order to gain the upper hand while his own people suffer.

I don't need you to be happy. I just need you to leave me alone when I am.


Posts: 442 | Registered: Aug 2012
2yrs+recovering
♀ Member
Member # 31582
Default  Posted: 4:55 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Xanax was a life saver for me in the first year. I took a low dose and not on a regular schedule just when I really needed to feel normal and not jump out of my skin.

Weaned myself off of it and Ambien.

I still take an occasional Xanax, probably 3 times a month.


BS (me)59 FWH 71
Married 35 years
4 children and 3 grandchildren
5 yrs into R.
Now that he has changed and become the man he should have been all along, why should I start over?

Posts: 560 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: New Jersey
Ladyogilvy
♀ Member
Member # 31558
Default  Posted: 5:20 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Many of the perscription anti anxiety meds are hit and miss. Some can make things better and some can make things worse depending on the person. I had a bad reaction to a prescription med so I take L-Theanine as needed in the day time. It's an amino acid which helps take the edge off without slowing me down. For sleep, I take L-Tryptohan (another amino acid) or Melatonin Plus. Melatonin Plus comes in a big bottle with a low price from Costco. Valium helps as well bit I don't take it often because I don't want to become addicted. I only take it if L-Theanine isn't working.

[This message edited by Ladyogilvy at 9:50 PM, June 13th (Thursday)]


Me: BW a youthful 49
Him: alcoholic, sober now, WH 56
Married 19 years
Two sons, 16 & 17 years old
DD? He's still keeping secrets and only admits to what I have indisputable
evidence of... the $2000 earrings he bought her for x-mas.

Posts: 1536 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: California
lilflower1000
♀ Member
Member # 36634
Default  Posted: 5:27 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I haven't read all of the advice here, but just be careful. I have tried some meds that made me wake up and want to put a gun to my head.However, I have heard that it can be quite helpful for many people. Your doctor is the one you need to speak to. Unfortunately, it seems like most docs just hand it out like candy without going over the possible side affects.


lilflower1000
Me: 44 BS
Married 12 yrs
Dday:8/1/2012
True R: 12/2012
4kids(11, 8, 5, 4mos)+ 2 Step kids I love like my own

Posts: 313 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Georgia
FeelingSoMuch
♂ Member
Member # 38814
Default  Posted: 5:36 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Cipralex has been wonderful for me. It's helped with everything you mention here and it continues to allow me to focus at work.

I also find that IC is essential whether you're planning to stay or leave. It's keeping me sane.

Good luck and stay strong.


Me: BH
Her: WW
Together since 2001, married since 2007.
D-day: Feb. 20, 2013.
Broke NC: 2 phone calls since
Today: In MC and IC, attempting R.
It got easier: They no longer work together.

Posts: 509 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Canada
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 5:47 PM, June 13th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes anti anxiety meds can be very helpful. I warn against Xanax many have a reverse reaction with it (particularly add types). It can also be very addictive. Ativan on the other hand seems to not have the issue with reverse reaction am tends to be easier to wean off. It is also a great sleep aid. If you are not sleeping that can contribute to the overall anxiety.

You may also find work to be a great escape. It helped to stop the cycle of overwhelming stress. It helped to keep me same.

I did not take an antidepressant as I didn't feel I was truly depressed but dealing with overwhelming grief. My Dr agreed.

((((and strength)))


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8709 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
Topic Posts: 13

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