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Newest Member: spaceplease (45329)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Going dark on posting about your relationships
Crescita
♀ Member
Member # 32616
Default  Posted: 11:05 AM, June 17th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh wow, it makes me kind of sad that so many donít feel comfortable sharing because of harsh replies. Iíve noticed NB is a bit tougher of a crowd than some of the other areas. We don't sugar coat.

Maybe if we make more of an intention to share the ups people won't pounce all over the little downs


Posts: 3445 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: The Valley of the Sun
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 1:00 PM, June 17th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think it's because the downs usually occur after we've either been warned that nothing good can come from a course of action or we've warned others of the same things we are doing to ourselves BTDT, got the t-shirt.

The problem is that we all have to make our own mistakes, even though we may know they are mistakes. People are funny like that


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 20281 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
tabitha95
♀ Member
Member # 22033
Default  Posted: 5:05 PM, June 17th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The problem is that we all have to make our own mistakes, even though we may know they are mistakes.

So True!!!

I see this in every forum from JFO, down to NB.

I was offended in R when someone from D/S posted something negative. She was right of course. I didn't know it until a couple months later.


BW (me) - 45
DS 14, DS 11
D-Day#1: Oct 30, 2008
D-Day#2: June 3, 2011 (same MOW) Separation: June 3, 2011
Divorce finalized: Feb 2012 (due to 6 month waiting period).

Posts: 3250 | Registered: Dec 2008
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 8:52 AM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The problem is that we all have to make our own mistakes, even though we may know they are mistakes.

Too true.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Newlease
♀ Member
Member # 7767
Default  Posted: 10:54 AM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I went dark about my first relationship post-D - because it was totally dysfunctional, and I knew I would get 2 x 4s. And I just wasn't ready to end it, until I was. I posted some about it after it was over.

The issue was it was too soon (9 months post-D) and I was too fragile, not yet healed, and wanted to make it work so I could be vindicated in some way. Completely foggy thinking, now that I have some distance from the situation.

So I was too embarrassed and ashamed to share what I knew deep down was a bad relationship.

Current SO and I have had a few minor situations and when I post, I take care to sift through the advice and take what I need. But I'm much stronger now and this is a really good relationship.

NL


Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

Posts: 7739 | Registered: Aug 2005
NaiveAgain
♀ Member
Member # 20849
Default  Posted: 5:47 PM, June 18th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I will post about some of my issues, but usually after I've sat on them for a few days or discussed them with a friend or two and can't figure it out on my own. I also know some of the SI'ers IRL, but it hasn't really changed how I post. I am what I am. All the time.

I am guilty, though of not posting too much of the happy, sappy stuff. 2 reasons:

1. It probably won't last and I will have to eat my words, yet again.

2. I don't want to be like "OMG, he is amazing, we are soul-mates, he makes me scream, blah blah blah" when half the people on here are on the bus and it makes me feel like I'm bragging. Although, thinking this thru, I guess I've been thru enough shit that I kind of deserve a guy that can make me scream for a bit.....


Original WS D-Day July 10, 2008. Kept lying, he is gone.
New WS (2 EA's, no PA) 12-3-13
If you don't like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree.

Posts: 15288 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: Ohio
Topic Posts: 26
Pages: 1 · 2

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