So sorry that you need to be here. Sounds like you are on the roller coaster ride. My WS never showed any signs of remorse, tried to blame me for the affair, rewrote the marriage, rewrote me too for that matter!! So, I can not share any experience with R.
I hope you have talked to an attorney to find out your rights. I know you have small children - I was married before and stayed in that marriage in part, because of my son. I wanted him to have his father in his life. One of the things you might ask yourself, is what are you teaching your children about love, about marriage? Is this the example you want them to have? What they will know about a marriage, is what they see in their home. My intention is not to hit you with a 2 by 4, but just to give you a different perspective on things - a more long range view.
Take care of yourself, so glad that you are posting here and getting the support you need.
It will get better. I am almost 8 months out and while I still get hit with the pain and anger, I don't wake up thinking about him, or her, or the affair. I know I will never be the woman I was before and I have found a reserve of strength that I did not know that I had. You will find that strength as well.