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Newest Member: utterlydone (44718)

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User Topic: It's time - hospice for Mom
okaynow
♀ Member
Member # 13813
Default  Posted: 1:53 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((NIK))) Sending prayers for peace for you and your dad.


Married 18 yrs, together 25+.
D-day: 2/18/07.
1 child
The story doesn't really matter anymore. Time is a great healer. Life is good.

Posts: 2430 | Registered: Mar 2007
kernel
♀ Member
Member # 27035
Default  Posted: 5:15 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you all. You would think that having years to prepare would make this easier, but it really doesn't.

It doesn't help in this moment, no. I have found that it eased things afterward. That sounds weird, but I feel like it has made the grieving afterward easier. (easier being a relative term - none of it is easy) I feel like I came to acceptance a lot sooner than I would have if my father's death was sudden.


"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% - and that's pretty good."

Posts: 5058 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Midwest
Mrs Panda
♀ Member
Member # 27303
Default  Posted: 6:17 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh honey, hugs to you. Hospice care will give your Dad some comfort and rest and I believe they can come out 24/7.

I have worked with some hospice patients in my line of work, and the experience to provide dignity at the end of
life is wonderful.

Again, hugs.


Me-41 FWW Him-45BH
M 13years. Reconciled.
DDay#1 Nov 2008 (OM2)
DDay#2 Aug 2009 (Confessed to OM 2001)
"Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand." -Kurt Vonnegut

Posts: 1971 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: The SouthEast
wildbananas
♀ Member
Member # 10552
Default  Posted: 6:19 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh honey, I am so sorry.

Knowing it's coming doesn't make it easier. There's just no way to truly prepare for something like this.

(((((Empress and family)))))


Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

Posts: 15383 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Now an AZ girl
million pieces
♀ Member
Member # 27539
Default  Posted: 6:20 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((((((NIK and family)))))))))


Me - 42
2 kids, 9 and 11
D-Day 2/5/10, separated 3 wks later
Divorced 11/15/11!!!!

Posts: 1241 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: MD
confused615
♀ Member
Member # 30826
Default  Posted: 6:23 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((((((((NIK))))))))))


BS(me)41
FWH 45
4 kids..21,20,11,9
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10
Status: Happily Reconciled.

..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.


Posts: 7313 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: Indiana
SisterMilkshake
♀ Member
Member # 30024
Default  Posted: 6:40 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Nik))) (((Nik'sParents)))


BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson


Posts: 9539 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
jjsr
♀ Member
Member # 34353
Default  Posted: 8:08 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am sorry. Sending you good thoughts during this time


Me: BS
Him: WS
Married since 1985
Parents to 2 adult sons and 3 of the cutest cats you have ever seen
D-day 8/6/11 Truth about ONS and 9/21/11 Truth about EA
Trying to reconcile

Posts: 1617 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: midwest now.
TrulyReconciled
♂ Member
Member # 3031
Default  Posted: 9:45 AM, June 20th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sorry NIK. After all you've been through ...

Peace to all.


"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

Posts: 21040 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Hell and back, way back :o)
BaxtersBFF
♂ Member
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 9:47 AM, June 20th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((NIK)))


WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6097 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 10:02 AM, June 20th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so sorry Nik.

Hospice is wonderful. I heart if heavy for your dad also. My heart is heavy for you and your family. I do understand what you are going thru. I am here if you ever need a friend.


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 19 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
False R. Still Lying.
Will be divorcing soon!
"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have"!

Posts: 2661 | Registered: Aug 2011
sisoon
♂ Member
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 10:49 AM, June 20th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry. I wish hugs and comfort for your Mom and Dad and you.

When it's time, it's best for your Mom - that doesn't help the survivors much, though.


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 9991 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
stupidstupidme
♀ Member
Member # 11888
Default  Posted: 10:53 AM, June 20th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength
August Wilson

Posts: 19714 | Registered: Aug 2006
MissesJai
♀ Member
Member # 24849
Default  Posted: 12:33 PM, June 20th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OMG (((NIK))) my heart breaks for you and your dad. Sending you prayers for comfort.


FWW - 41
I'm big on personal responsibility. Own your shit. ALL OF IT.

Posts: 5846 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: So Cal.....
cass
♀ Member
Member # 24261
Default  Posted: 5:06 PM, June 20th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((NIK)))

It's so hard, I'm so sorry


DDay - April 2008
Me - 54 and doing great. Found myself again and loving life
Him - who??

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone (Johnny Nash)

Those who stir the shit soup get to lick the spoon!


Posts: 4965 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: UK
NaiveAgain
♀ Member
Member # 20849
Default  Posted: 5:25 PM, June 20th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

NIK, I am so so sorry. Sending you and your family hugs and positive thoughts......((((NIK and family))))


Original WS D-Day July 10, 2008. Kept lying, he is gone.
New WS (2 EA's, no PA) 12-3-13
If you don't like where you are, then change it. You are not a tree.

Posts: 15193 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: Ohio
Topic Posts: 56
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