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Newest Member: Makeitstop85 (44953)

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User Topic: OW stalks my facebook page.
Bluebird26
♀ Member
Member # 36445
Default  Posted: 6:14 AM, June 22nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If she is coming as a suggested friend, it could be because you are searching for her or she is friends with your WH or mutual friends of you and your WH.

Do yourself a favour and block her, she doesn't deserve any space in your head.


"Loving someone should not mean losing you. Love empowers you. It shouldn't erase you. - Thelma Davis.

Posts: 1335 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
Kierst13
♀ Member
Member # 39197
Default  Posted: 9:43 AM, June 22nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think you have it backwards. If she comes up after you put in the first two or three letters of her name in a search, it's because you have been looking her up, not the other way around.

Nobody can tell if you are looking at their page/profile.


Story in my profile
He lied, I gave the gift of R
He became the model remorseful WS...all while lying and seeing her
Am I done? Yes I am!

Posts: 347 | Registered: May 2013
Vulcanized
♀ Member
Member # 33523
Default  Posted: 10:21 AM, June 22nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Block, block, block.

I understand the urge to put up pix w/XW, however, do you really want OW having pix of you?


Me: MH 40s; Him: MH 40s (I had RA)
OW: 30s, moron; one of many
M: 8 yrs
3/13: D'd
-----------------------------------------------------------
Everything is as it should be.

Posts: 752 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Vulcania
Ashland13
♀ Member
Member # 38378
Default  Posted: 10:28 AM, June 22nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This topic so messed with my head that I finally deleted my face book account altogether. When photos of my child and my life's events appeared with her name linked to STBXH's, I was done. And when our deceased dog showed up on her page at my house, I was livid. When photos of STBX's b'days that I threw him showed up on her page and I took the pictures, I was also done.

You know, after I deleted my page, within the next month or so, I started getting call-hang ups in the middle of the night. When I casually mentioned this to Perv and the advice the police gave me, it stopped.

I'm on the team saying just block her or delete your page-be strong and don't get sucked in to their crap.

It also really helped me detatch from looking, because I was borderline OCD looking to see what he was doing-now I can't and I'm so relieved not to know.

Also, the thoughts about leaving a window open for OW to look in on your life is true and it's terrible.

It only took a couple weeks to get used to not going to FB at all and I am so relieved not to be part of anything they are. They made life such an unreality there that the only way to get control for me was to get off.

And if she/they can steal my pictures, what else could they get hold of, for any of us?


Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington


Posts: 2229 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: New England
AFrayedKnot
♂ Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 10:32 AM, June 22nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Stop letting her rule your life. BLOCK!!!! She is not worth any second of your time or energy.


BS 39
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2586 | Registered: Aug 2012
Dark Inertia
Member
Member # 30727
Default  Posted: 10:49 AM, June 22nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know because of FB's suggested friends. And if I go to search and type in the first letter of her name, she pops up before my actual friends do.... Something to do with FB's algorithms and tracking info.

Yeah, that happens when you or someone in your household has been looking her up, not the other way around.


"If I listened earlier, I wouldn't be here. But that's just the trouble with me. I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it."

Posts: 1252 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: The Ohio
Lalagirl
♀ Member
Member # 14576
Default  Posted: 9:19 AM, June 24th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I could care less if xOW is looking at my page (we have a couple mutual friends) - nothing but happy on my page - happy times with H, my kids and grandkids - photo bombs everywhere. Not to piss her off, but for my f&f to enjoy. If she wants to torture herself, so be it.


Me - 49; FWH - 51
Married 30 years 9/2/13
2 grown daughters-30 & 27
5yo GS & 20 mo. GD & GB #4 due 8/15(DD30) and 2.5 yo GD(DD27). D-day #1 - 1/06; D-day #2 - 3/07
Reconciled! Construction Complete.

Posts: 5058 | Registered: May 2007
Chefj9
♀ Member
Member # 38604
Default  Posted: 12:13 PM, June 24th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

nothing but happy on my page - happy times with H, my kids and grandkids - photo bombs everywhere. Not to piss her off, but for my f&f to enjoy. If she wants to torture herself, so be it.

Exactly my post too. Look all you want, my life is coming back together, we're happy and I'm not going to hide. If she wants to torture herself, then let her.

I think everyone has their thoughts on FB etc. I think if it detracts from healing or causes pain, then block, block and block. But if you reach a point, that it doesn't hurt you, then who cares, let them look all they want.

She already has hundreded of pictures of the inside of my house, I don't care what she sees. I don't post anything on FB that I wouldn't want my own mother or priest to look at.


ME - BS 49, Him - WS 46 trying to "R"
4 DD's - blended 25, 15, 15 and 12
Multi DDays the grand finale 5/13/2013
From here on out, I am only interested in what is real. Real people, real feelings, that's it, that's all I'm intere

Posts: 470 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Texas
Lalagirl
♀ Member
Member # 14576
Default  Posted: 12:25 PM, June 24th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She already has hundreded of pictures of the inside of my house, I don't care what she sees. I don't post anything on FB that I wouldn't want my own mother or priest to look at.

Amen (pun intended)!


Me - 49; FWH - 51
Married 30 years 9/2/13
2 grown daughters-30 & 27
5yo GS & 20 mo. GD & GB #4 due 8/15(DD30) and 2.5 yo GD(DD27). D-day #1 - 1/06; D-day #2 - 3/07
Reconciled! Construction Complete.

Posts: 5058 | Registered: May 2007
LA44
♀ Member
Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 12:31 PM, June 24th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

There might be something tho to the "suggested friends" fb often throws out.....

ya think?


Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2288 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
Dare2Trust
♀ Member
Member # 21183
Default  Posted: 2:04 PM, June 24th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

As others stated: My FB is for my friends and family...If the Psycho OW wants to bother checking my FB; then she can just see happy photos of my family, our home, and our fun trips. It's her loss - and NO! She didn't get my life!!

Unless she found another man to rent her an apartment out of the ghetto; and buy her a computer - she probably doesn't have access to the internet anyway!


Me BS 59
WH 58
Married 19 years
D-Day Nov 3, 2005
Child: Adopted Daughter 21 College Student now

I can understand being alone; but I hate being with someone and feeling lonely.


Posts: 6121 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Texas
Bobbi_sue
♀ Member
Member # 10347
Default  Posted: 3:00 PM, June 24th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree with Tired. Load up your page with pictures of you and your loving, devoted spouse and let her stew in her own hate.
I've been doing this as long as I've had FB (since about 2008, I think).

I have few privacy settings and I don't block anyone because I figure if they want to see it bad enough, they will find a way. I think the best philosophy is to only post stuff that you don't mind if the whole world sees on FB and that includes potential enemies, OWs, stalkers, etc.

So I post pictures and positive things. If I'm going somehwere, I report it after the fact (if it is something I want to tell about) rather than announce to the world that I'm not home, making me a target for who-knows-what.


Posts: 5742 | Registered: Apr 2006
forgivenesswins
♀ New Member
Member # 37052
Default  Posted: 1:39 PM, June 25th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry I hadn't come back to the thread in a bit.
I know because she and my WH share an OC, and she called him about a photo I had posted with our kids in the bathtub demanding to have me take it down. It is mostly private, except sometimes I forget to change the privacy settings when posting from my iPhone. I don't give shit who sees what I post - it's FACEBOOK for Pete's sake. I just find it sad for her.


BW- Me, 40
WH- Him, 39
Together 14 yrs.
D-Day - June 2012
DSD15, DS12, OC(D)4, DD2

Posts: 24 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: TX
Topic Posts: 33
Pages: 1 · 2

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