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Newest Member: Clorissa (44728)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: 6 Year Update
kansas1968
♀ Member
Member # 32214
Default  Posted: 9:23 PM, June 25th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you so much. Those type of posts give everyone hope.


Me - BS
Him - FWS
DD - December 14, 2010
Married 43 years 1/14/2011
Affair lasted 7+ years
Affair had been over for 2 years before I found out. OW sent me a letter.

Posts: 1304 | Registered: May 2011 | From: Kansas
Want2help
♀ Member
Member # 20547
Default  Posted: 11:17 PM, June 25th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am also 6 years out this month, and even in a situation where an OC was conceived, I feel very much the same way.

Good for you and your spouse, Harden.


BS- me.
FWS- him.
DDay 6/07 (immediately separated)
RDay 8/07
Surprise OC born 3/08 (NC)
7 years into successful R.
"That which can be destroyed by truth should be." -P. C. Hodgell

Posts: 2232 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: PNW
Wonderingwhy11
♀ Member
Member # 34782
Default  Posted: 12:37 AM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you for the positive post. It is encouraging. You are right about anger. You do have to let go of the anger.


Me BW - 46
Him WH - 53
Together 23 yrs, Married 18
DDay August 2011
2 kids - 13 and 15

Gotta love the life that we livin'


Posts: 376 | Registered: Feb 2012
LivinginLimbo
♀ Member
Member # 35004
Default  Posted: 6:15 AM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is very timely. In MC our counselor gently hinted that it's time to start focusing on the present.

We have worked hard to sort through this. My H continues to make strides in changing that part of him that led to his cheating.

While I'm not quite ready to let it fully go, I know that eventually it will need to happen.


BS - 62
FWH - 60
Married 34 years
D-Day 2/12/12
Doing well with R

Posts: 1019 | Registered: Mar 2012
RockyMtn
♀ Member
Member # 37043
Default  Posted: 9:31 PM, June 26th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love the focus on YOU in this post. Especially this part because it is my philosophy as well. It is a philosophy I am not living all day, every day, but for many moments at a time:

I now know that the secret of happiness is a calm mind. In other words, just being relaxed and enjoying what is around you at the moment; nothing more and nothing less. Learning to accept that the past is just memories, and the future has endless possibilities. To stop worrying about mistakes from the past and no longer dread a future that has not yet arrived.


Me, BS, 30s
Him, WS, 30s, Steppenwolf
Kids: Yep
D-Day 1: September 2011, 6 week EA
D-Day 2: January 2013, discovered EA was a PA; there was another PA in 2010. All TT.
Goal = serenity.

Posts: 667 | Registered: Oct 2012
petite71
♀ Member
Member # 36475
Default  Posted: 9:21 AM, June 27th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for posting,I really needed to read a positive story. I am a year & 3 months from D-day. I am still suck on the anger stage. So happy for you.


1st DD 03/24/2012 2nd DD 07/13/2012 TT A. in 2002 same girl when we were dating.
Status:Getting Stronger...we can get through this & are healing together
BS(me):41
WS(Husband):40
LTA 10 yrs EA/PA 9 times. friends with benefits.
Us..Together 12 yr

Posts: 125 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: USA
Fallen
♀ Member
Member # 4313
Default  Posted: 10:51 PM, June 27th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh my gosh has it been that long? Seems impossible... I remember when you first came here and how you struggled to understand what your WW was going through. I'm so happy that you're in a good place. May a day never pass without your wife saying a prayer of thanks that you gave her a chance to reconcile.

Blessings on you both.


You can't heal what you won't feel.

"There would be no grand absolution, only forgiveness meted out in these precious sips. It would well up from his heart in spoonfuls, and he would feed it to me. And it would be enough."


Posts: 23481 | Registered: May 2004
HardenMyHeart
♂ Member
Member # 15902
Default  Posted: 3:00 AM, June 28th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you everyone for the kind comments and well wishes.

I remember when you first came here and how you struggled to understand what your WW was going through.

Fallen...It's kind of strange...at times, it feels like it was such a short time ago, and at other times it feels like it was a lifetime ago.

I'm happy you and your H are doing well.


Me: BH, Her: FWW - Long Term EA/PA
d-day: June 25, 2007
Married 30 years, Reconciled

Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.


Posts: 5641 | Registered: Aug 2007
sadandtrying
♀ Member
Member # 19246
Default  Posted: 10:41 AM, June 28th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations to you and Mrs. HMH...nice of you to share and inspire....I often look for posts from us "older" folks who have come a long way since dday....

Your words about a "calm mind" and The "Desiderata" are words to live by....


Posts: 1064 | Registered: Apr 2008
Mrs Panda
♀ Member
Member # 27303
Default  Posted: 8:44 PM, June 28th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Me-41 FWW Him-45BH
M 13years. Reconciled.
DDay#1 Nov 2008 (OM2)
DDay#2 Aug 2009 (Confessed to OM 2001)
"Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand." -Kurt Vonnegut

Posts: 1971 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: The SouthEast
myone and only
♂ Member
Member # 26450
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, July 1st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you> I also needed the positive post today.


me BS 51
her WS 45
status: R
"Just You And I"
dday 11-28-09

Posts: 67 | Registered: Dec 2009
jsmith032077
♂ New Member
Member # 39726
Default  Posted: 3:52 PM, July 1st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Your post has given me great hope. I have been going through this on my own for 2 years and I'm feeling like it will never get better. This is my first post here. I still have my wife, but she's never been hurt like this so she can't relate. I found this site just a few days ago and this took me out of my hateful mind for the first time in a long time. I hope that I can get to where you are soon.

Thank you so much for posting your update


ME: 36
WW: 32

Posts: 17 | Registered: Jul 2013
Topic Posts: 32
Pages: 1 · 2

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