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User Topic: The healing power of dogs
Atticus13
♀ New Member
Member # 39630
Happy  Posted: 11:18 PM, July 2nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Warning: potentially cheesy post to follow

Had a really rough day...almost two months since separating...going through with filing the divorce...sorting through all the awful feelings about the A and WH, and as I settled in for the night my two dogs came and curled up against me.

They are both pretty special dogs...one an adopted mutt with a bum back leg who had been fending for himself on the street until the rescue group found him. He's such a spunky little guy now. My other dog is a stray pitbull my WH actually found about a year or so ago...she was starving...just a bag of bones and her ears had been cut off. Today she is a thriving, gentle soul who has become the adopted dog's best friend and constant companion.

During the unraveling of my marriage, they stuck to me like glue. I can't help but think, at the end of this rough day, they were meant to come into my life as examples of what the worst of humanity can do to a living being and how they survived and found a better place. Maybe I can learn something from the two furballs curled up against me


Posts: 11 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: CA
purplejacket4
♀ Member
Member # 34262
Default  Posted: 11:26 PM, July 2nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Not sappy at all.

There were times that only my dogs seemed to love me. I could talk to you guys and my IC but EVERYONE else iRL was as enmeshed with fWS as with me. I couldn't even talk much to my own mother (a WW/AP for 30 years).

So it was me and my dogs. Eight months after dday when fWS broke NC and started to waffle our middle dog got sick with cancer and died. Evidently OW didn't much care. This lack of respect for animals and people's relationships with them is one reason fWS finally kicked her to the curb for all time. I guess their "LURVE" did not include doggy bowls, cleaning crap or poo kisses.Ha!


Me: BS 45
Her: fWS 48 (same sex partner)
Together: 18 years now (both MDs)
OW: meh so what 40s PhD
DD1: 10/30/11EA; DD2: 11/10/11 Had ONS; TT until 12/26/11; broke NC 6/12; NC again 7/12; R-ish

Posts: 2079 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Great Southwest
heartache101
♀ Member
Member # 26465
Default  Posted: 11:48 PM, July 2nd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh I believe they are here for us 100%!
I have 4 furbabies and each one has their special place in my life.
Not sappy at all!


There are degrees to which you let people back into your life and degrees to which you let them back into your heart-which, of course, are not the same thing

Posts: 3185 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Indiana
hitbyatruck
♀ Member
Member # 23769
Default  Posted: 12:24 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love to hear about the healing power of dogs.

I have 4 that loved me through the rough times. They didn't care that I was miserable, they needed me. WHen I didn't want to get out of bed they MADE me.

AND there is nothing like hearing a dog fart to break a sad mood. I can't help but laugh every time one of them lets one rip.


Married 1998, 2 kids
D-day3/27/09,he left 5/23/09
WH wants to rebuild 3/21/10
He moved back in 9/25/10,
Dec, 2011-finally putting it all together, H had multiple affairs.
Possible porn addict for 15 yrs.
01/2014- in house separation

Posts: 3279 | Registered: Apr 2009
LosferWords
♂ Guide
Member # 30369
Default  Posted: 1:09 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I will never forget my late Siberian Husky, who died just a little over a year ago. To me, he was an assurance that I would never be alone.

Even if I wasn't showing my tears to anyone else in the world, he never minded that I soaked his neck fur as I hugged him and cried out my soul. He never judged me for it, either.

He was always ready for me to mess with him, play with him, or take him for walks through the snow.

All of the neighbors knew him by name, so when I was going through my grief, and I was walking through the neighborhood and I didn't want to talk to anyone, the neighbors would always flock towards him. What little conversation I was able to muster was about the greatness of my Husky. Yet another burden he took off of my shoulders.

When it was his time to go, I kept some of that treasured neck fur. Sometimes I secretly carry it with me in my pocket on days that I am struggling, and I feel like he is with me, and he gives me strength.

Never underestimate the healing power of dogs. They are such a beautiful gift to us, and provide us with genuine unconditional love.


Posts: 6237 | Registered: Dec 2010
UKlady
♀ Member
Member # 39058
Default  Posted: 2:26 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow in the space of a couple of minutes this post has had me first in tears, then LOLing - really laughing, back to tears again!

(((Atticus13))) - thank you for writing this. I have two cats who, though obviously by their very nature are not quite as 'loving' as dogs, have sometimes helped me get through this awful time too. They have stuck by me (yeah cupboard love I know!) and been a constant in the tribulations. I'm so glad you have your wonderful dogs to help you too.

AND there is nothing like hearing a dog fart to break a sad mood. I can't help but laugh every time one of them lets one rip.

hitbyatruck OMG I seriously cracked up at this!! Thank you for a lift this morning!


Me: BW 45
Him: WH 48
Married: 6 years, together 9 years
D-day: 3 January 2013 - he confessed.
A: June-Dec 2012
No children.

Posts: 153 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: UK
Unagie
♀ Member
Member # 37091
Default  Posted: 2:27 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My furbaby has curled in a tight little ball next to me when I was just staring at the ceiling not moving. She has curled in my arms while I was crying a licked my face until I smiled and hugged her and she has loved me in every way possible...even when I hated myself, even when I was so full of anger no one would want to come near me this little bundle of fur and love would melt my heart. I have soaked her fur with my tears many times and she has stood there and let it happen and then curled up as close to me as possible when I was done.

I very much believe that our dogs have a special way to show us love and pull us out of the dark times. She is a former abused dog as well, my dad rescued her for the family when out first dog passed and it quickly became apparent that she was mine and I was hers.


Heartbroken madhatter trying to rebuild

No longer together

Do not let others be your reference for who you see in the mirror.

Stop allowing people to hurt you, because you don't love you enough to walk away.


Posts: 2639 | Registered: Oct 2012
catlover50
♀ Member
Member # 37154
Default  Posted: 5:20 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah I'm a " doglover" too! Have three of each.

A client told me this story recently about her dog. They were hiking and he was off leash exploring. She met a woman who started talking about her dog that she lost and started to cry. The client's dog came back and pressed his head into the crying woman's stomach until she calmed down, than ran off to play again.

They can be so amazing.



Dday -9/24/2012
Reconciling

Posts: 1710 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: northeast
stronger08
♂ Member
Member # 16953
Default  Posted: 5:36 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have always had animals. I cant begin to tell you how many tough times were gotten through because of them. I have a Pitbull mix who had some serious socialization issues. Not vicious, just scared shit of people. Damn dog actually spent the first 6 months with me hiding under my bed. I was going through a tough time right about that then, Depressed, self medicating, closed off to the world etc. That dog came out from under the bed one night and just curled up with me. He has been by my side since, We kind of helped each other out with our problems. He was a friend when I thought I had none. And I'm happy to say we are both doing well these days. As I did not want this dog to begin with I feel it was some divine intervention that brought us together. Just his goofy nature gives me a good feeling when I'm down.


You cant eat soup with chopsticks.

Posts: 5558 | Registered: Nov 2007
itainteasy
♀ Member
Member # 31094
Default  Posted: 6:40 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My cattle dog is a rescue...he was horribly abused. But he has such love for life and for people, you'd never know.

I have days where I feel like he's the only one who loves me, and I cherish every puppy hug and kiss.

Animals are amazing.

Anyone who says they're "dumb" or "soul less" is a person I don't want to know.


Posts: 3301 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: NWPA
Williesmom
♀ Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 6:46 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When I was going through the D, I had a huge black collie. This dog was awesome - he had a calming effect on everyone around him. He has since crossed the rainbow bridge, but he visits me at night sometimes for just a scratch on the head.

He left me with 3 Welsh corgis that leave chaos and laughter wherever they go.

I could never understand how Wxh could leave them. Me? Sure. Them? Never.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7428 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 6:46 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I cried to my dogs many times (I scared them once because of this!)

There's nothing like feeling down and having a mastiff come lay on top of you...


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 19795 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Jennifer99
♀ Member
Member # 39551
Default  Posted: 8:37 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My WH has fought us getting a dog since our last one died. This has been on my mind for a year. I want a dog. I want to rescue a dog from the humane society. Right now though I'm afraid its totally selfish. When I am sure I am fully functioning I am getting one, probably two, though.

Posts: 556 | Registered: Jun 2013
dlock
♀ Member
Member # 24622
Default  Posted: 11:15 AM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm with you Sad in AZ, I've got three mastiffs and they truly saved me.

Posts: 149 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Virginia
cancuncrushed
♀ Member
Member # 28156
Default  Posted: 1:45 PM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am a huge dog person. My shih tzu was very elderly and very sick while this hell went on. I had to put her down. Also, my kids empty nested. It was all very hard on me. My trust for love is really low right now. I have never been without a dog, its been 2 yrs. I am not ready. Her death was horrible. But I do look at rescue dog pictures every day. It cheers me up. ANd I know, there will be one some day.


a trigger yesterday

Posts: 885 | Registered: Apr 2010 | From: athome
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 1:48 PM, July 3rd (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love dogs. They just heal your soul with their love and devotion. I don't have any of my own right now, so when I miss some puppy love I just borrow one or two from my bff who currently has four. So far, 2 weeks is his maximum limit before I have to bring his babies back.


I'm sorry if you don't like my Honesty, but to be fair I don't like your lies.

Sometimes it's better to push someone away...not because you stopped loving them but because you can't take the pain anymore.


Posts: 13647 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
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