My STBX wants to put one in our divorce in CT and I'm refusing. I was just wondering how common they are nowadays and why anyone would agree to this.
W/H-currently has a new girlfriend. We are still living in same house.
I'm only asking because most BS want it. I had one in my decree. Mine prohibited ex douche from introducing the kids to anyone for at least six months after the D was final. It also contains an ongoing clause that says neither one of us could have the kids exposed to sleep overs until they have been around that other person for at least six months. As far as I know, my ex stuck to it. But, I suspect that him sticking to the clause had a lot to do with the fact that hes a lawyer and he knew I would nail his ass for purposely violating an order if he stepped out of it. It wouldn't have looked good for him at all. Hoever, I've heard that people who are not in our specific situation violate these clauses all the time.
You could craft a morality clause any way you want. Some people agree to never cohabitate with anyone outside of marriage. I could have tried for that, but what's good for the goose ... I didn't want my hands tied like that. Mine I think is pretty tame,. It's really there mostly to protect the kids from either seeing their parent with someone else too soon (usually the OW/OM) or to make sure that they don't get exposed to a revolving door of partners and see mom or dad sleeping in bed with a new person every couple months.
All sorts of things that I am learning.
Protect your children, absolutely!!!
I had a morality clause in my PSA. It stated no other adult sleeping over with children present without prior authorization of other parent. (Ex is gay, I had to word it to cover men...)
What my L said was that I can include it, but it covers both of us (I was fine with that....) and that they are very, very hard to enforce. Courts don't really care about civil/moral issues.
We have now been separated 2.5 years holding my health insurance in place. He has been in a relationship for 18 months and they are going to move in together soon. I told him that we can remove the morality clause in the final decree...I can't stop the inevitable from happening, and frankly, I don't care any longer.
"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings
Actually he wants a morality clause against ME!
Aparently he thinks you should stay home an pine away for him.
Saying that, it is not enforceable.
But my bigger concern is WHY is you stbx staying in YOUR house??!! I don't care that is used to be the marital home, it is now YOUR home, not his. what YOU need is a clause for exclusive rights to the home. No more overnights for him. YOu can tell him that him spending the night violates the morality clause
I did talk to him and it turns out, he's not thinking about the kids, he doesn't want to have to deal with me having any males in the home what so ever. So he figures I will stop socializing with my guy friends (which I have for the 12 ys we've been together), so he doesn't have to deal with wondering if I'm dating any of them. He is asking for no men in the house even when kids are not there and away with him for the weekend. He's just crazy now.