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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: How did you handle the breakup of WS and AP?
Chabeli
♀ Member
Member # 25838
Default  Posted: 11:15 AM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's finally happened after so many years of their nasty fights, I really don't know much details but he said something like, "You know such and such and I are not together and she's got to pick up the rest of her things from the apartment." I'm just numb to the whole situation anyway, I don't feel any kind of emotion. I've been through alot in the past 6 years or so. I've just keeping going on with my life.

How did you guys handle it? Did you gloat, did you party...
...Or did you say, " I told you so!!"


Posts: 477 | Registered: Oct 2009 | From: New York
ButterflyGirl
♀ Member
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 11:29 AM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I felt pretty good.. Till they got back together a week later. Apparently him cheating on her wasn't a dealbreaker. I'm sure that 1 week made him learn his lesson


xBW~ 35
Two of the most darling sons ~ 10 and 7

Posts: 2005 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
gypsybird87
♀ Member
Member # 39193
Default  Posted: 11:38 AM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'll let you know when it happens.

*taps toe impatiently*
Where IS that stinking Karma bus??!!


Me: Looking forward to the future
Him: Left behind in the past

Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life. ~ JK Rowling


Posts: 665 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Oregon
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 11:39 AM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think I said, "Ok." And when I hung up the phone, I went back to washing dishes.


You can call me NIK

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.
- Plato


Posts: 24437 | Registered: Aug 2011
Amazonia
♀ Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 11:40 AM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Last I heard, my XH and his OW/gf are still together, but if he ever did feel the need to tell me they'd broken up, all he'd get was crickets.

He's such a nonentity in my life.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13566 | Registered: Jul 2011
ajsmom
♀ Member
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 11:43 AM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How did you handle the breakup of WS and AP?

Which one?

AJ's MOM


Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!


Posts: 21032 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
roughroadahead
♀ Member
Member # 36060
Default  Posted: 12:49 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

At this point, I would throw a party. I don't care what he does after this, but I want that woman gone.

He would inevitably come crawling back, so I hope I would have the strength to kick him in the face.


BS-Me 30s
WS-Him 30s
D-Day 4/2012 (Insisted EA only)
D-Day 5/2012 (Did I say EA? Ummm..)
Numerous other TT/broken NC d-days until S 1/2013. D settled 11/2013
MOW-coworker, 40s.
2 DS and DD all w/autism

Posts: 725 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: USA
Sad in AZ
♀ Member
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 12:59 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm with Ama; he's pretty much a nonentity in my life. I have a feeling they broke up for a while but may be back together? Honestly, I don't care.

My only 'concern' would be if they ever marry; I really don't want to deal with them as co-grandparents to MY grandchild/ren


I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

Posts: 19806 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
Crescita
♀ Member
Member # 32616
Default  Posted: 1:10 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I could care less if they are together since I stepped off the crazy train, but we don't have kids, so he is cleanly out of my life. Back around the time of D she was still with her BH and he told me she had just used him. I laughed. For a few months after he would send fishing emails with cryptic updates. I guess he figured out I could give two shits because he finally quit.

Posts: 3263 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: The Valley of the Sun
Mandilwen
♀ Member
Member # 27186
Default  Posted: 1:18 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Relieved! I kept getting calls from the sitter and neighbors making sure I had the kids cause she was punching my ex on the front lawn.

There was a time that he had to bring my kids back to me, along with the OC, because of the wifetress craziness. I know she has been diagnosed BPD and has previous manipulation attempts at suicide.

They are technically still married, but she's been overseas for two years now. I found out from my former mil, that they got into a physical fight and he told her he should have stayed with his first, true family...Glad all that drama is over, but only cared about it because of my kids.


BS-34; WXH-32; DS8; DS3; OC3
DDay: SEPT 2008
Divorced: JUNE 2010

Posts: 318 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Indy
IrishLass518
♀ Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 2:10 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It hasn't happened yet though if they do I would feel relieved for my kids and I suspect xWH would be relieved also.


Me: 45 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 22, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1676 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
Dreamboat
♀ Member
Member # 10506
Default  Posted: 4:45 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was pissed because they blew up my life and DD's life for no good reason. Their stupid fantasy tru lurv could not stand up to the cold face of reality.

But then I was like "eh, who cares. Not my problem anymore"

Now they are back together. X is unemployed and has been ill and he is sponging off OW and the national health system in the UK. Again, not my problem.


And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

Posts: 17605 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: A better place :)
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 5:51 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I will feel 'here we go again'. He would be imposing the next iteration of "the one" on my girls within a month or two.

I'm kind of hoping this one wastes her 20s/30s on him - that he wastes his 40s/50s on her. Better the devil you know - as they say.

[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 5:52 PM, July 9th (Tuesday)]


Buzz- The word you are searching for is 'Space-Ranger.'
Woody- The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there are Pre-school toys here.

Posts: 5441 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
inconnu
♀ Member
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 7:24 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

ex and wifetress just got married earlier this year, so I doubt a breakup will be happening any time soon, if at all. If it ever happens, then oh hell yeah, I'll gloat. To myself. And to my sister and friends. And probably laugh about it with my kids.

I really don't want to deal with them as co-grandparents to MY grandchild/ren

although this is probably quite a way in the future for me, yeah, that's the issue I've got now that ex married OW. I've already made it clear to my kids that I will be the good (aka cool) grandma, when the time comes.

[This message edited by inconnu at 7:26 PM, July 9th (Tuesday)]


Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect


Posts: 12124 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: TX
kernel
♀ Member
Member # 27035
Default  Posted: 8:23 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm still waiting for it to happen. If/when it does, I will privately do a happy dance, but it won't affect my life in any way. I think my kids would be so relieved.


"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% - and that's pretty good."

Posts: 4924 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Midwest
GabyBaby
♀ Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 8:30 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had several reactions:

First, which AP? XWH was a man whore, so there were a number of them.

Second, I reacted with an eyeroll and a "here we go again". Before I remarried, I didn't need to be told when XWH was short on female attention, because when there was an open position, he'd start texting and IMing me with attempts down memory lane. WTFever.

[This message edited by GabyBaby at 8:48 PM, July 9th (Tuesday)]


Me - 42
SorryInSac - WH#2 - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4yrs, together 7yrs total

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
5 Furkids (3 Dogs, 2 Cats)

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW)
Legally married 18yrs, together 16.5yrs

Note: I edit often for typos/clarity.


Posts: 6077 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
AussieMum
♀ Member
Member # 36579
Default  Posted: 8:39 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd be gloating but crickets to him. Although I imagine I'd probably put something sarcastic on FB Sometimes I just can't help myself....

But I would also be worried about my kids. He introduced them to OW3 as soon as he moved out and they quite like her (as much as it pains me to write that - it could be a lot worse if she was a bitch to them). They are now all living at her house. If STBXH and OW3 split, then it's yet another wrench for my poor kids.


Me 46
ExH 51
EA Jun-Aug 12 (OW1)FB flirting and then EA/PA with OW2 (Aug-Dec 12). New OW Jan 13, introduced her to the kids immediately.
Married 10 years, together 14yrs
2 kids (DS11 & DD7)
Separated Jan 13. Divorced Jun 14

Posts: 180 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
Decimated
♂ Member
Member # 31656
Default  Posted: 8:43 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

XWW told me that OM dumped her after his divorce was final. Ours was final one month later. I don't even know if I believe her...so many lies about him.

It really doesn't matter. She still has no interest in fixing all of the damage she caused. It does piss me off to think all of the pain she put me through was all for nothing


Decimated
Me -BH 48
Her-WW 40
D Day #1 9/09 (found out about friendship, she promised NC...she lied)
D day #2 1/11 (found out EA on going...she lied)
D day #3 4/11 (found out EA was a PA...still lying)
M 16 years, 3 kids
Divorced - 1/13

Posts: 106 | Registered: Mar 2011
Kajem
♀ Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 3:10 AM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I doubt he would tell me. My kids would, and I would be happy for them. I think they would be happy the gatekeeper to their father would be gone.


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 4855 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Vulcanized
♀ Member
Member # 33523
Default  Posted: 3:33 AM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I believe that I have no fucks which I could give.
But, my feet are swollen & I can't get these bitch boots off ....


Me: MH 40s; Him: MH 40s (I had RA)
OW: 30s, moron; one of many
M: 8 yrs
3/13: D'd
-----------------------------------------------------------
Everything is as it should be.

Posts: 731 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Vulcania
Topic Posts: 32
Pages: 1 · 2

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