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Newest Member: LadyS (45361)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Got a call from the wife of someone
♀ Member
Member # 4286
Default  Posted: 8:30 PM, July 16th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The wife/ex-wife/fiance/whatever is "crazy" because he CAUSED her to be crazy!! Sheesh.... we've seen that often enough amongst our own tribe here.

The funny thing is, the biggest red flag to me was that he told you he's a "great guy". Guys who say that are usually players in my book.

This. My fabulousness will be apparent to anyone within short order. I don't need to tell them that I am fabulous. Uh... unless I'm really not and just want them to think I am and buy into my ruse.

Divorced - recovered and hoping to help.

"We're not broken, just bent, and we can learn to love again" ~Pink

Posts: 3086 | Registered: May 2004 | From: Midwest
♀ Member
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 10:46 PM, July 16th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I enjoy hanging with my friends and having a few drinks. We are guilty of over doing it on occasion, but its a safe atmosphere, so no worries.

But, regardless of how it came to be, this guy is drama, and I would stay away from that if it were me. It's simply not worth the risk, esp for a party guy I've hooked up with once. There are too many other options to take that bet under the circumstances. Especially so close to home. Just my VHO.

((Hugs SSM))

Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling

Posts: 4609 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
♀ Member
Member # 19946
Default  Posted: 11:46 PM, July 16th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What was attractive about this guy? He seemed very ill behaved, with terrible boundaries and I'm puzzled as to why you would consider dating him even before finding out about the wife. I am glad you are stepping away now at least, but there were so many warning signs from the beginning. Stay safe!

BS, age 53, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years and 20 together. Now I am living alone in the beautiful rural property that was once the dream retreat with X. It's taking a long time to create new dreams but despite some struggles I am mostly happy.

Posts: 5859 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California
♂ Member
Member # 16953
Default  Posted: 4:03 AM, July 17th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just my .02 cents here. But this guy seems to be a classic WS. I mean come on, how many times have we heard that the BS was crazy and jealous ? That's right out of the WS handbook. I'm almost positive that infidelity has been prevalent in his M. They are D for a reason after all. As for the neighbors. Who the hell knows what he is telling them about his W. Shit my XWW went around telling stories about me to people. And lots of them believed her. They very well may be fooled by his bullshit too. After all I've been through one thing is a given. If it looks like shit, smells like shit, its certainly shit. Be glad you did not step in it.

You cant eat soup with chopsticks.

Posts: 5730 | Registered: Nov 2007
♀ Member
Member # 11888
Default  Posted: 9:00 AM, July 17th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

lmao I totally agree. I don't know who did what to who, or why, or what is accurate. I don't even care... it's a shit show that I don't want to be involved in.

I have a feeling that he is doing things with the ex wife - trying to get back with her - and lying to his friends to sort of "save face" maybe. And of course, if he's a shit, he'll paint her out to be "crazy".

But won't he look like the fool if they reconcile. He will look like one, and SHE will be one... SHEESH

Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength
August Wilson

Posts: 19732 | Registered: Aug 2006
Topic Posts: 25
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