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Newest Member: Calmisgood (45060)

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User Topic: His BF Is A Cheater!!
petite71
♀ Member
Member # 36475
Default  Posted: 2:51 PM, July 19th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have a question...Would you all be mad if your H stayed friends with a womanizer & a person who found a prostitute on craigslist??? He's married by the way. His W found out because she was working with the cops & he got busted. This was before my H had the A.
My H says he has been his friend since High School & he only talks to him on the phone. He told my H recently that I been keeping him on a short leash for over a year now. When my H told me that I said well he is not a friend of the marriage,so he needs to be out of our lives. My H says
that he doesn't see why he should have to,because AGAIN they only talk on the phone once in awhile. Wouldn't you all be pissed off?


1st DD 03/24/2012 2nd DD 07/13/2012 TT A. in 2002 same girl when we were dating.
Status:Getting Stronger...we can get through this & are healing together
BS(me):41
WS(Husband):40
LTA 10 yrs EA/PA 9 times. friends with benefits.
Us..Together 12 yr

Posts: 125 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: USA
cancuncrushed
♀ Member
Member # 28156
Default  Posted: 2:58 PM, July 19th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would be and am at times. My H was still in contact with several college friends. Some were active cheaters. ANd they did try to talk him into hanging out. It never went over well for our marriage. He went twice. Now I shudder to think what they did. It has been years, but those cheaters have failed marriages.


a trigger yesterday

Posts: 918 | Registered: Apr 2010 | From: athome
petite71
♀ Member
Member # 36475
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, July 19th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Make it clear as she... I mean the prostitute was working for the cops.


1st DD 03/24/2012 2nd DD 07/13/2012 TT A. in 2002 same girl when we were dating.
Status:Getting Stronger...we can get through this & are healing together
BS(me):41
WS(Husband):40
LTA 10 yrs EA/PA 9 times. friends with benefits.
Us..Together 12 yr

Posts: 125 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: USA
petite71
♀ Member
Member # 36475
Default  Posted: 3:01 PM, July 19th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I guess my H's BFF is more important than his W & M
That's how I feel.


1st DD 03/24/2012 2nd DD 07/13/2012 TT A. in 2002 same girl when we were dating.
Status:Getting Stronger...we can get through this & are healing together
BS(me):41
WS(Husband):40
LTA 10 yrs EA/PA 9 times. friends with benefits.
Us..Together 12 yr

Posts: 125 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: USA
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 4:52 PM, July 19th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

only talk on the phone once in awhile

Oh, then it's OK! I guess that it's OK to keep in touch with the local drug dealer, as long as its only once in a while. To go out and bang someone as long as its only once in a while. To drive drunk as long as its only once in a while. I mean, heck, it's not like it's every day after all!


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4857 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
petite71
♀ Member
Member # 36475
Default  Posted: 6:56 PM, July 19th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Skan:I know...RIGHT!!! He looked at me like I was so ridiculous.


1st DD 03/24/2012 2nd DD 07/13/2012 TT A. in 2002 same girl when we were dating.
Status:Getting Stronger...we can get through this & are healing together
BS(me):41
WS(Husband):40
LTA 10 yrs EA/PA 9 times. friends with benefits.
Us..Together 12 yr

Posts: 125 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: USA
staying hopefull
♀ Member
Member # 5748
Default  Posted: 7:04 PM, July 19th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

you know the saying...birds of a feather, flock together..


Me - BS (40) FWH (43)
Two children
Together 20 years, married 15 years
Reconcilied for 9 years!

Posts: 1031 | Registered: Nov 2004
petite71
♀ Member
Member # 36475
Default  Posted: 7:58 AM, July 20th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

LOL!!! I tell him that when we talk about his friendship. He is speechless after I tell him that truthful phrase.


1st DD 03/24/2012 2nd DD 07/13/2012 TT A. in 2002 same girl when we were dating.
Status:Getting Stronger...we can get through this & are healing together
BS(me):41
WS(Husband):40
LTA 10 yrs EA/PA 9 times. friends with benefits.
Us..Together 12 yr

Posts: 125 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: USA
womaninflux
♀ Member
Member # 39667
Default  Posted: 6:50 PM, July 20th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I definitely have misgivings of my H remaining friends with friends of his who cheat on their wives. I also don't like the friends who knew about the A. But in the end, you can't control ANYTHING. A therapist would say it's not healthy to the R process to be around people who are unsupportive of your relationship. But again, you can't control anything.


BS - mid-40's
SAWH - mid 40's
Kids - 2 elementary school aged
Getting tons of therapy and trying to "work it out"

Posts: 897 | Registered: Jun 2013
petite71
♀ Member
Member # 36475
Default  Posted: 7:28 PM, July 20th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I hear ya womaninflux. My H needs to find a new BFF. I been worried about fixing him & not myself. He had the E/P LTA & needs to also stop rug sweeping.
Time to worry about me.


1st DD 03/24/2012 2nd DD 07/13/2012 TT A. in 2002 same girl when we were dating.
Status:Getting Stronger...we can get through this & are healing together
BS(me):41
WS(Husband):40
LTA 10 yrs EA/PA 9 times. friends with benefits.
Us..Together 12 yr

Posts: 125 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: USA
Topic Posts: 10

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