Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: Highlanderlady (45437)

Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Struggling today :(
Grace and Flowers
♀ Member
Member # 34431
Default  Posted: 2:37 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I thought I could get through today. I know I will, but I'm surprised at how...down... am.

Today would have been my 26th wedding anniversary. I'd lived with XWH for 30 years when we split. Last year, although he was gone and we were over, we were still legally married on our anniversary. I got through it with lots of empowering music and inner toughness.

Last night XWH emailed me to tell me he wasn't sure what to say about today, that he'd never sure about how to say anything, really, that he was sorry he didn't know how to tell me he didn't love me anymore, and that he would "think of" me today.

Needless to say, I didn't respond to that mess. A few weeks ago he told me that I am "in everything he does". Really? Am I there in the middle of him and OW? I don't think so. He has been with her about 2 years now (I think...never got straight answers about much of anything), but he won't call her his gf....says he doesn't know "what she is" in his life.

I've actually done really well these last two years. Worked hard on feeling better, and I do!! I have a great life, I'm quietly seeing a great guy, life is better without WXH. So, I was surprised to wake up feeling this sadness. I don't want him back. I guess the email shook me up a bit, I don't know. I'm annoyed at myself for feeling sad today!

Argh!

And just to explain why we occasionally talk...one DS is critically ill. Too much to discuss via text, and easier to answer questions on phone. Not that we do that much. WXH usually has questions about medical bills first, then maybe about DS. And, it doesn't upset me to talk to him, when we do. It's usually short and to the point. Sometimes he cries.

Sorry to ramble. I've been feeing 98% great about my life. But today is one of the other 2%.

Thanks for listening. I know you all understand.


I'm Happy, not Sad!

Posts: 1177 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: US
Faithful w/Love
♀ Member
Member # 33128
Default  Posted: 2:42 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

that he was sorry he didn't know how to tell me he didn't love me anymore, and that he would "think of" me today.

This might be why you are feeling this way.

Even thru you don't want to be with him this was a way to sorta of hurt you and it did. Just to see words like that would hurt anyone.

What a PRICK!


BS(ME)40 WH(HIM)38
DD 20 and DS 15
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"


Posts: 2804 | Registered: Aug 2011
BrokenDaisy
♀ Member
Member # 37063
Default  Posted: 2:54 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just wanted to post for support and to acknowledge your feelings. I'm sorry you're having a bad day. It was an asshole move to send you that email.

It does sound like you have many positive things going for you so give yourself some slack for feeling down on such a big trigger day. I hope tomorrow is much better!


Me BxW, him SA NPD WxH
1 wonderful toddler - sole legal custody to me and supervised visitation to xwh.
DDay 01/2012
10/2013 Finally Divorced!!

Posts: 266 | Registered: Oct 2012
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 2:56 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow. How noble of him to take some time out from his selfish life and "think of [you]" today.

FTG!


(((SadMad2012)))


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3623 | Registered: Oct 2011
DeadMumWalking
♀ Member
Member # 25341
Default  Posted: 3:00 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WHAT A FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!!

((((SadMad))))

I'm so sorry this day is so hard, I hope you can carve out a little time from your day to make yourself feel special in some way.

F. T. G. big time.

((((SadMad))))


Me (BS), Him (WH): early 50's
3 DS: teens!!! :)
M: 25 (19 1/2 at Dday), Together 30
Dday: Dec 2008
Limbo-ish, again (after multiple S) -- weighing my options

Posts: 2624 | Registered: Aug 2009 | From: EU
Williesmom
♀ Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 3:01 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yeah. Totally FTG. What a jagoff.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7781 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
soveryweary
♀ Member
Member # 32265
Default  Posted: 3:50 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

SadMad, sending you hugs.


Divorced 1/3/14

Posts: 627 | Registered: May 2011
Grace and Flowers
♀ Member
Member # 34431
Default  Posted: 6:40 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for the support.

And, you guys? THANK YOU for reminding me......

F. T. G. !!!!!

How could I forget those three little letters? Totally made my day!

I actually painted "FTG" on the inside of my closet door. It's now covered by a full length mirror, but *I* still know it's there!

Thanks again. I buried myself in some work, and I'm now gonna fix me up some toasted ravioli....yummmmm!


I'm Happy, not Sad!

Posts: 1177 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: US
caregiver9000
♀ Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 6:52 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I read your post and was all ready to (((hug))) and assure you that of course we understand and 98% is awesome and you'll be back to it tomorrow for sure!!

and then,

I actually painted "FTG" on the inside of my closet door. It's now covered by a full length mirror, but *I* still know it's there!

I snorted. I grinned. I love this! And I realize you got this already.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5864 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Topic Posts: 9

Return to Forum: Divorce/Separation Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.