For the first two years after Dday, I would have welcomed it and committed to trying R. For the third year, I mostly thought I wouldnít try R, but I wasnít absolutely sure. I wouldnít put it in writing or put it on this board because I wasnít deep-in-my-gut sure.
Today, I saw Phantomlimbís thread asking about a remorseless WS making the big turnaround and it being too late. And you know what? It IS too late. Iím finally DONE. I know that I would not be willing to do the damn hard work of R with him. I would rather put that work into MY new life, not trying to fix his. If and when I am in another serious relationship, I will be all in to the nth degree. But it will never be with X. And that is a really good place to finally be. DONE.
Acceptance is such a gift.
We did false R for 7 months...I would have gladly have tried to really make it work. But, I told him that if we S, I was D.O.N.E.
I think it is great to know that now your life only moves in one direction, and that is forward.
"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings