Topic: I'm So Tired...
Member # 38924
| Posted: 5:30 PM, July 31st (Wednesday), 2013|
...of R. haha. It's hard work! :) Anyone else? I love my H again, but geez, if someone told me I'd be a freaking martyr when I grew up, I wouldn't have believed them. To an extent I think we all are. Martyrs for the sake of love we have for our S's, regardless of shit we're dealing with.
Things I think about while listening to everyone here and priding myself on the fact that it takes a big person to forgive.
Path less traveled.
Makes me stronger.
I'm sort of ranting today. No harm intended, just trying to reach out. I still wouldn't trade my life or boys for anything. Now, the actions of my H, well, you get the picture...
Me-BW 35. STBXH-35,active alcoholic, suspected NPD SA. 2 little boys. M 6yrs T13.
Year+ false R & TT from Dday1 Nov 2012 IEA - Feb 2014 count at 10 OW PA's 1LTA (all W lied to) for 3 years that I know of.
S, gonna D.
Posts: 796 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: So Cal, baby. :)
Member # 30369
| Posted: 5:40 PM, July 31st (Wednesday), 2013|
That right there is what doesn't make you a martyr.
I agree, though. It is tiring, and VERY hard work!
I love your list of things to think about. I'm going to borrow that, if you don't mind.
BH/WBF - 40
FWW/BGF (Amerasia) - 43
DS - 10
Posts: 4014 | Registered: Dec 2010
Member # 38341
| Posted: 5:54 PM, July 31st (Wednesday), 2013|
You hit the nail on the head, liberty. We're pretty close dday#1 and I feel ya. Just remember "[We] can survive this...Talk to others who have.". Just keep on talking.
Hang in there.
Just call me Heart. :)
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything" ~Mark Twain
Posts: 375 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: St. Louis
Member # 35215
| Posted: 6:26 PM, July 31st (Wednesday), 2013|
Hang in there! I'm hanging by a thread right now. This R rollercoaster IS tiring and some days I want to just get off.
BS/FWS (me):40 Madhatter
WS/BS:42 Serial Cheater
Together 18 years, Married 13
DDay(s) 5/08, 5/09, 3/30/12
"If it can be destroyed by the truth, it deserves to be destroyed by the truth." -Carl Sagan
Posts: 2219 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: California
Member # 33549
| Posted: 8:47 AM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013|
"It takes a big person to forgive."
I love your list of positive traits, things to think about.
M 30 yrs
Dday 3-19-11, TT 10/2011, Full truth July 2013
Strength comes from within. You can't get it from someone or go somewhere to get it. It is already here, waiting to be used when you need it most. Believe in yourself.
Posts: 555 | Registered: Oct 2011
Member # 37107
| Posted: 9:17 AM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013|
I know just how you feel! I wrote this post some time ago -
Pretty much expresses how I was feeling at the time
BS (me) 46
Together 29 yrs, M 25 years
2 daughters 24yo(married with a babe on the way!) & 18yo
D-Day 18 Aug 2012
6mth EA lead to 4mth PA with CO-W. I found out 8 1/2 yrs later Trying to R
Posts: 705 | Registered: Oct 2012
Member # 39774
| Posted: 10:22 AM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013|
It is. I told my IC this yesterday. That I was feeling tired... drained and a little indifferent.
I am 26(Bgf). He is 36 (Wbf).
On Again, Off Again - 10 years.
Not Married. No Kids.
D-Day: Too many to list/ remember.
Trying to Reconcile.
Posts: 103 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: San Francisco
|Topic Posts: 7|