I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy
As for tattoos hurting. My first on I was so scared (this chic hates needles) that at first I thought I was dying. However, once I relaxed it was OK. No worse than scratches. The second one, I sat and watched the whole thing. It was pretty cool to watch and I didn't feel a thing. But I hear it depends on pain tolerance, OK...but I don't handle pain at all, and location you are having tattooed.
Be happy with what you have while you work for what you want - Hellen Keller
Learning to breathe again - one day at a time
A couple months after moving out, I got one on my inside right ankle that has a treble clef and three eighth notes. Just to show how much my music has helped me to get past all this. My sister suggested that the three notes could represent my two sons and me. I like that.
Also, they just look cool!
The Princess, on the other hand, went to a piercing place with her new boyfriend and had her ear cartilage pierced. She wore it for two months through the pain before she had her mom and dad take it out for her. Turns out it was badly infected. She was poking at it that night, and sprayed the mirror with puss! When our oldest son told me about this, I couldn't have been happier. That's just a tiny bit of the rotten trying to escape from her body!
[This message edited by pass at 10:23 PM, August 8th (Thursday)]
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous
Not really all that funny, but in my profession people are always talking about having "NO CPR" tattooed on their chest (nobody ever does it though).
But, after this experience and the hell it was....
All I could only think of on appropriate tattoo and that was having
tattooed on my chest in big block letters.
"NOT THE OTHER GUY"
on my back.
I now know I won't. Because this time I haven't buried it- as much. I am facing it bite by bite, with or without MrH. I don't need a destructive symbol to remind myself he's used all his chances and then some. Next time, I will leave- pain, desperation, love...it won't matter. I will walk away because of the scars over my heart. They don't need to be visible like I thought they should be after d-day.
For a time I wanted a cross or hopeful message on my wrist to remind myself not to slice it open; later when I started cutting to not cut.
Instead, I got a cliche. I have a simple phoenix on my left shoulder. My name IRL has a meaning that includes "fire" and was often my nickname growing up. Eventually it became a version of phoenix, even before d-day. So it was natural that's what I would get. I looked at the design I had picked, and while I prefer clean, simple tats, I wanted color too. So I added reds, oranges and yellows to the head and wings. It fits because they have a spiky, almost flame shape. The tail is curled like waves and blues and white. I didn't plan it, but to me it represents trail by fire that is quenched by the Living Water.
It's me, it's mine. I was on the other side of the country from MrH when I got it. It's not infidelity...it's my past, future and faith.
I still want another. There's an author that has a beautiful bracelet tat that reads "Redeemed" and I would love something like that. It's bad form to copy custom tats though. I want it to remind me of where my strength has come from in those moments when a voice has told me to just cut...I was unwanted anyhow. I didn't need to shed my blood. I am wanted so much, blood was already shed for me.
Given how emotional that will be, I need to make sure it's a design that I won't mind looking at when I'm 70.
❣I hope my issues don't discourage ur healing. I've buried a lot & my WH hasn't done his part in R❣
Me: FWS/BW from 1st marriage
Him: BS, fabulous love of my life
Us: Reconciled with struggles
Whenever I feel down, all I need to do is look at that beautiful piece of art. No doubt, it's been a long road to get here.... Hugs to all and wishing healing thoughts.
"You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul"