I was up nursing my youngest at 2 am and I got an inkling to check WH's phone. Once baby was asleep I went through the phone for a few minutes. Once again there was nothing to be found because WH seems to be respecting NC and hasn't been buying pot (he communicates with his dealer by text) i know he hasnt been deleting texts because he has no clue that they still show up in the iphone spotlight search. It was such a relief, I am so proud of him.
A little voice at the back of my head chimed in "sure he is behaving for now but give it time..." But I'm trying to ignore it and celebrate every victory, no matter how small.
Anyone else have a small (or big) victory to celebrate today?
[This message edited by mychild at 3:01 PM, August 9th (Friday)]
Always helps to take a moment and focus on the positives.
Makes it all worth it.
Finally this is R 8/14/13
"Forgiving is a journey; the deeper the wound, the longer the journey".
Yesterday,WH and I were at the grocery store. We were in a fairly crowded aisle,and I was distracted because I had dropped my small notebook and had lost my list(same notebook I write all my grocery lists on...so they all looked alike,lol). Anyway,I was telling him to find lasagna noodles while I looked for the list...and I glanced up and noticed this girl walking in front of my WH,looking for her own pasta..and all of a sudden,she bent over,way over, right directly in front of WH..she was skinny..and pretty-ish..tight shorts,tiny little tank top....whatever..she was young,and bending over in front of my WH. He was looking for the lasagna,and I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye..and he very clearly was NOT looking at her..but I was still irritated..and I forgot something at the other end of the aisle..so I told him I forgot something and took off in the other direction..walking away,thinking whatever..he will look at her once my back is turned..I can't police him,he's going to do whatever he wants..all of this running through my mind...anyhoo..I got to the other end of the aisle and grabbed the tomato paste that I had forgotten,and turned to go back up the aisle to my WH..and he was there..right behind me. He was hurrying towards me(I walk fast)..and I realized he *knew* what I was thinking and that I was feeling crappy about the girl bending over..so he must have decided the best thing to do,rather than wait on me to come back to him..he would follow me..rather than sneak a look at the girl..he followed me. The aisle was crowded,so turned the cart around and actually being able to have gotten down the aisle so quickly couldn't have been easy,lol..I know..it's not a big thing..but it made me feel good. He knew I was uncomfortable,and he made sure I knew he was *with* me..you know?
I didn't tell him that I noticed...maybe I will today when he comes home from work.
[This message edited by confused615 at 4:52 AM, August 10th (Saturday)]
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.
I love your story! I think you should tell your husband. It's sweet.