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Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: ...and the truth shall set you free
NoGoodUsername
♂ Member
Member # 40181
Default  Posted: 2:20 PM, August 11th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I came clean on everything today.

The response: As far as I am concerned, this marriage is over.


Me: WH
Her: BW
Dday 7/11/13
"May you be protected from hearts that are not humble, tongues that are not wise and eyes that have forgotten how to cry."

Posts: 252 | Registered: Aug 2013
Mrs Panda
♀ Member
Member # 27303
Default  Posted: 2:33 PM, August 11th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I commend you for coming clean. It is early and she is angry. She doesn't know who you are. Exposing our weaknesses is scary.

Show her that you are willing to introspect and change. And you yourself will be better for it , no matter what happens.

Don't give up.


Me-41 FWW Him-45BH
M 13years. Reconciled.
DDay#1 Nov 2008 (OM2)
DDay#2 Aug 2009 (Confessed to OM 2001)
"Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand." -Kurt Vonnegut

Posts: 1992 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: The SouthEast
rachelc
♀ Member
Member # 30314
Default  Posted: 2:39 PM, August 11th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

NGUN: The thing is, without the truth, you were controlling the information so your spouse couldn't make a decision. Do you really want to be married to someone you have to manipulate like this to stay married to? So, you layed it out there. There is no marriage if there is a secret between spouses... there is no chance for intimacy is you share a secret with an AP.

Integrity, to me, is telling the truth and letting go of the outcome. This is exactly what you did... the right thing.

Your marriage can't be good unless you are both healthy. there is no other way. And having a secret from your spouse is unhealthy...

The only thing you can do is focus on getting healthy and you just took the first step.

I'm sure this was so so difficult. I've been there myself. But I would rather be married to someone who knew all of me, the good and the bad.


his Dday: 2/10 but TT until 7/11
my Ddays: 1/12, 4/12 broken NC 12/12

me (WW/BS): 48
him: (BS/WH)52
4 kiddos in mid 20's

The conditions we face do not define us. They remind us of who we are and who we want to be.


Posts: 5249 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Midwest
NoGoodUsername
♂ Member
Member # 40181
Default  Posted: 3:19 PM, August 11th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She is outing me and my affair partners on social media right now.
After the post goes up, I'll be logging in to confirm her statements to everyone.

Today has been exactly a month since D day and it has been the worst month of my entire life. I don't want to be divorced. I want to reconcile this marriage and have a life together more than anything in the world. I know that my wants matter very little in the wake of what I have done.

...

I can't believe that I have thrown away the love of this passionate, intelligent beautiful person who has stood by my side, literally and figuratively with sword in hand, against all comers. And for what? A tawdry romp with someone who didn't respect our marriage.

I wish with all of my heart that I hadn't been unfaithful.

My wife, I am sorry. I apologize for all of my failures and betrayals.


Me: WH
Her: BW
Dday 7/11/13
"May you be protected from hearts that are not humble, tongues that are not wise and eyes that have forgotten how to cry."

Posts: 252 | Registered: Aug 2013
Topic Posts: 4

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