so am I wrong? Are school supplies like this day to day expenses, or exroardinary expenses that he should be helping with?
Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless
We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.
WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.
I guess it more just ticked me off that he gave me such an attitude. I never asked for 50%...I actually specified that I was taking care of all school supplies and clothing for all three boys and simply asked if he could take them to get new bookbags and lunchboxes since theirs from last year were a mess and had been used two years in a row already. Last year it cost me $150 just for 2 kids school supplies alone..not even clothing, and now our youngest is entering kindergarten. I have not asked for anything extra from him...though he had no problem asking me to cover 1/2 of a $400 bmx bike HE wanted to get oldest DS for his bday. Um, no! I got him something from me already and if he chooses to promise an expensive gift, that's on him to figure out. Yet I'm given attitude for asking for a small assistance on a necessity for school. sigh
School supplies are so expensive!
So I emailed him, since he would have my son that weekend he could take him to get his stuff.
I was shocked (for a minute, then remembered I'm dealing with a complete asshole) when he replied "of course I will not be buying back to school supplies. That is what I pay child support for."
Yeah, ok Dooosh. Thanks for NOT stepping up to the plate once again to do the right thing by your kids!
So I feel your financial pain. I don't understand who they think they are hurting?? It's not ME- its the children. When I have to tell them sorry I cannot buy the other things they want (daughter needs all new clothes for school since she grew 2 sizes since last September) it is not me who will be sad. It's the children.
Why don't they get that!??!
I have 3 kids in private school, so the extra costs are a LOT and never ending. Uniforms and school supplies alone cost over 500 dollars. I'm a teacher married to another teacher and he makes 6 figures in corporate and refuses to help.
It is what it is.
My DS14 needed a laptop and uniforms for school and stbx will not help pay for. I could ask for reimbursement for half in our settlement offer but I'm using it as leverage instead.
Back to your questions: No, I don't think you are wrong. I think school supplies are extraordinary expenses. He can take his reply and shove it.
Ex actually *volunteered* to give me extra to offset the cost of b2s shopping! So far I have received 1/6th of what he agreed to contribute. I hope I receive the rest but I'm not going to hold my breath. I plan as though he will not do what he says he will do and then if he actually does it's a pleasant surprise.
Boy was I wrong!
~Feel your emotions, but control your behavior~ Unknown
Therefore I buy all clothing, and the large back to school buying, but he buys all pajamas and shoes.
I pack my kids lunch every day, but he has to purchase the Costso membership.
We split school supplies 50/50. Literally, he takes one kid shopping, I take the other.
At first, my ex was the same, "THAT is covered under the HUGE amount I pay you in CHILD SUPPORT!" I went back to the mediator, and she helped him "see" what cs covers. CS is for the food in their mouths, the clothes on their back and the roof over their heads. The basics. BUT, that only covers 85% of their "life", he has them 15% and therefore needs to pay for 15% of the "stuff". Does that make sense?
My situation may be different in that I keep 100% of the kids things at my house. I pack a bag when they visit him (or ...now...they pack!) and it is all returned. We just found this works easier for us since they only go e/o weekend to him.
"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings
I haven't even asked for him to cover half of all extra-curricular activities. My dd had summer basketball league. It was $50, plus I had to transport her to all games (not one was less than 30 minutes away). But I've kind of set a threshold amount in my mind. If the activity doesn't cost more than I can comfortably afford, I go ahead and pay it.
I get a modest amount of CS and he pays it on-time and without any fuss. I hate to give him any credit, but he is stepping up to the plate on that.