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New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: its done, i cried
hexed
♀ Member
Member # 19258
Default  Posted: 2:50 PM, August 23rd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm slowly bouncing back. Its good. TG is out of the country so I've been dealing with this last round of emotions on my own. that is a good good thing. I'm able to take the time to process them.

Its been so long since I thought of us as a happy couple that it was a shock that someone else saw us that way. totally weird.


But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler


Posts: 8404 | Registered: Apr 2008
click4it
♀ Member
Member # 209
Default  Posted: 2:54 PM, August 23rd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

signing the official divorce papers is going to bring up a range of emotions old and new, no matter how much time has gone by. I too didn't sign the official papers until 4 years after he left. on the day of, he actually looked at me and was hesitant in signing. my lawyer called me into the other room and then he signed without me there and took off.

after that it took me a few weeks to process all of it and then when you receive the final decree in the mail its another set of emotions.

its good you are allowing yourself to process to go through this final step.


Me: 41
Two boys: 16 and 13
Divorced 12-13-05
d-day 10-02-01

Laughter will cure life's ills. Have you had your laugh today?


Posts: 25505 | Registered: Jun 2002 | From: California
tryingagain74
♀ Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 5:59 PM, August 23rd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((hexed)))

Our mediation attorney told us that several times: "Are you SURE you want this? You guys don't seem like the type of couple that is getting a divorce."

One more for good measure: (((hexed)))


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3537 | Registered: Oct 2011
little turtle
♀ Member
Member # 15584
Default  Posted: 6:48 PM, August 23rd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((hexed))))

I'm glad this step is over.


Failure is success if we learn from it.

Posts: 4130 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
Survivor3512
♀ Member
Member # 37946
Default  Posted: 3:41 PM, August 25th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Hexed))) I hope you've had a good weekend and are feeling better.


Me (BS)- 36
Divorced
----------------------------------------------------------
Just keep swimming, just keep swimming- Dorie

Posts: 293 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Southeastern U.S.
traicionada
♀ Member
Member # 10310
Default  Posted: 3:58 PM, August 25th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wishing peace & healing (((hexed)))


Real love is a CHOICE, NOT a feeling...

Posts: 3242 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Dallas, Texas
hexed
♀ Member
Member # 19258
Default  Posted: 7:59 PM, August 25th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for the weekend wishes Survivor.

I'm doing fine. Thursday was tough. Turns out I made a big mistake at work on Thurs/Fri. Hope I can undo tomorrow so I don't get into too much trouble. Other than that I seem to be coming out the other side OK.

I'm avoiding X for 30 days just to give myself a break.

A long time ago someone told me that you need to not talk to an X for a whole month to really start to forget him. (mind you this was much younger and less serious relationships) but it really did help.


But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler


Posts: 8404 | Registered: Apr 2008
persevere
♀ Member
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 10:21 PM, August 25th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((hexed))) I'm sorry hon.

As for idiot UPS boy, people are stupid, and especially if they have no personal experience with a situation, esp one like a divorce, they don't get it. We are all well experienced with that due to those who just don't understand what it truly means to be betrayed - because we do.

There is a kid from my church who was just starting his career in financial planning when DDay hit. He contacted me to talk to XWH and I just a few weeks after DDay. We knew his parents through church. I was a basket case, but I explained the situation and that I needed some time and would get back to him. He proceeded to follow up with me every few weeks. It felt invasive and upsetting, and even now, I still have no desire to talk to him - because of his lack of understanding of what I was going through - he branded himself in my mind as part of what I associate with post-DDay. Point is - sometimes people are stupid, and they have no idea how hurtful their actions might be.

((Hugs)) hexed - and I think some good old fashioned NC is a great idea.


Me: BW-43
Him: XWH-43
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling


Posts: 4363 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
Topic Posts: 28
Pages: 1 · 2

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