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Newest Member: AutumnGlow (45083)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: ws to fws
confusedsad
♀ New Member
Member # 39298
Default  Posted: 11:24 PM, August 25th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When does a spouse turn from a wayward spouse to a former wayward spouse? I have seen people put that in their messages, but I don't know when that transformation happens.


Me- Betrayed - married 16 years
Him- 2 week affair with someone at work
9 kids
Trying to R

Posts: 35 | Registered: May 2013 | From: confusedsad
MrsDoubtfire
♀ Member
Member # 24786
Default  Posted: 2:48 AM, August 26th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When you are 110% shown proof that their cheating behaviours are now in a former life. If there is still any chance of seeing anything remotely suspicious or if they continue to disrespect you or the M then they are still wayward in their thinking.


BS(Me) FWH(Him) DDay 05.09
A went underground. True R 02.10
I won't let another woman reap the benefit of enjoying the man my H has now becomeć

Posts: 1579 | Registered: Jul 2009
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 5:41 AM, August 26th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I seem to have developed my own coding system.

He is being transparent, kind, in mc and ic. I believe that he is not a risk at this time for betrayal but I don't trust yet completely.

I always refer to him as "h", no capitalization, and the "a" is also not capitalized. I guess I think of the capital as a sign of respect, kind of like a name or God are always capitalized.

Silly but it's how I feel.

He will get the capital when I feel he has earned it and the "a" will never get it.


Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced 8/5/14


Posts: 1361 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
TxsT
♀ Member
Member # 39996
Default  Posted: 8:07 AM, August 26th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Confused...

For me it is a way to validate that I have turned the corner of being a BS and he has turned the corner of being a WS. We have worked long and hard and overcome this hell together. I acknowledge his pain along with my own, which is very hard from some BS's to do. To me a FWS means I no longer feel he will ever be that way again. He has discovered that he too made our marriage weak...something many WS's never admit to.

T


Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)

Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!


Posts: 605 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: CDN
Topic Posts: 4

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