No matter what your AP looks or acts like, they were giving you something you thought you needed. Something you couldn't or wouldn't ask for from your SO.
You have to figure out what that was, if your SO can provide that for you or if you really "needed" it in the first place.
I hope my H can figure that out. He says he doesn't need any of it but I have a hard time believing it since it went on for 3 years.