“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.”
― Pema Chödrön
You aren't lame. It's natural to look through pictures and feel that way. Years ago, I googled my x, found an old pic, and saved it to my computer. Looking at it made me feel blah, empty, hollow. In time, it gets better. Sending you strength and hope for a better tomorrow.
Were together 7+yrs, Ended R.
Unfortunately even photos of me and my girls when they were little were all taken by him. I tried to think of 'me' and them in the moments captured but thoughts of who took the photo used to intrude in on those memories.
A year on this road - I haven't thought of it until I read your post.
It gets easier, I promise.
I'm so sorry BG. I know right where you are. Be gentle with yourself. It is OK to grieve.
You are not lame. No lamer than any of us. It hurts. But it won't always hurt. The searing white hot agony will be reduced to sharp pain. The sharp pain will turn into a dull ache. And the dull ache will eventually be replaced by at the very most, slight melancholy.
And while you travel that path through the pain, we'll be here. Post whenever you feel the pain and we will rush in to hold your hand. Kind of like a labor coach.
Hang in there sweetie.