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Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Ok with them still working together..
ohiocarrie535
♀ Member
Member # 39709
Default  Posted: 11:26 PM, August 31st (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

They work in same facility. He's her supervisor actually. And at 6 months I've finally found myself surprisingly ok with it. I guess it boils down to me trusting that he won't cheat with her again. I really, really believe that. And I know now that I'm strong enough, that if the unthinkable happened again I would be done. Period. My anger and stress issues are much better now. I'm not pressuring myself to talk about A all the time. If I have a question, or concern I deal with it and drop it. Just bc the A is on my mind still a lot, doesn't mean I have to talk about it. I'm more pacient now with this TIME thing.

Posts: 83 | Registered: Jun 2013
Scubachick
♀ Member
Member # 39906
Default  Posted: 1:36 AM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well this gives me hope that it's possible for me to reach the same level of acceptance. I don't really worry that he'll cheat on me again with the OW....I just don't want him around her and I don't think I should have to be constanly reminded of her. Good for you though! I think that's awesome!!

Posts: 572 | Registered: Jul 2013
AML04
♀ Member
Member # 39682
Default  Posted: 10:04 AM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's weird. I really don't think he would "go there" again but my worry is that seeing her every day will eventually make him miss their A. Right now he says seeing her just makes him angry but what if that changes? Our life is he'll now and their A was all sunshine and show ponies. He says he understands it wasn't real but what if he starts needing to escape again? He may not go there physically but he could mentally and I'd never know.


Me-BS Him-WH DS 5/12
T-13 M-9
DDay 5/26/13, TT through 8/13
2.5 yr EA w/co-worker, PA 12/12 to 4/13.
Hopeful for R

Posts: 831 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: MA
duststorm
♀ New Member
Member # 40500
Default  Posted: 10:13 AM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good for you. I'm actually in the same boat as you, my WH is the supervisor of the OW. I hate that he has to see her, that she has to report to them, that there has to be contact. I want out of sight, out of mind.

I hope I can eventually find your strength so I can move on, too. My WH says I think about OW more than he does and I "make" her an issue. I feel so on edge daily with the fact that he has to see her. :(


Posts: 25 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Texas
flygirl96
♀ Member
Member # 22954
Default  Posted: 7:20 PM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

my husband also works at the same place as XOW. I don't like it but he needs his job and would never find one with all the benefits. I trust him and think he would be really stupid to even try anything with her again. I would leave in a second and we are truly happy now. He would never want to lose that.

Time heals us so at 6 months your doing really well. My XOW left the job a month before I found out but then came back because she couldn't find a job and I think she was hoping my husband missed her so much they would start up again. Sorry to tell her we grew up and realized what we had and what we wanted is each other.


Posts: 343 | Registered: Feb 2009
Topic Posts: 5

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