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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: He asked to have the dogs overnight
amitheow
♀ Member
Member # 4691
Default  Posted: 9:20 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Erz, you're back?
NO!

Well, *Sigh* I would say a big fat no. I kept Blanca when Erik left and she was his dog, technically ...

So no, no, no, no, no.
You don't owe him a thing. He did this ... and when he hopped on the internet and started his third bad behavior, he should have known what he was laying on the line, including his dogs.

Blanca saved me. I can't imagine Erik taking her overnight. I would have just ... lost it.

Sorry you're back. :(


Old Timer, Just here to help
My screen name is: Am I The Ow? - Not Ami the OW.

Because in my situation I didn't know if I was the OW at first or if I was being cheated on. Found I was being cheated on.


Posts: 5083 | Registered: Jun 2004 | From: Texas
erzulie
♀ Member
Member # 3293
Default  Posted: 10:44 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, I am back. Sigh. Didn't think I would ever be ... Life had other plans in mind for me, however, it seems.

I have both of my dogs licensed with the County - and I believe the licenses are both in my name only. I will confirm that, however. That will help my "cause", right?!?

I am just sick over this. The Ashley Madison bullshit was one thing ... taking my babies, well, that's the 7th Layer of Hell for my heart, tenfold.


A saying for my SI Family: "We may not have it all together, but together we have it all".

Fooled twice - almost exactly 10 years apart.


Posts: 3377 | Registered: Jan 2004 | From: California
sparkysable
♀ Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 11:18 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No fucking way! He might not give them back, and it's not as easy as you might think to get them back.

I had an ex boyfriend take my dog Sparky, it took 2 months of going to court to get him back, there were 2 police reports, and we WEREN'T MARRIED! Sparky was clearly mine, licensed by me, vet in my name. Ex boyfriend called the vet and changed the name to his, over the phone, I went to the vet and said if anyone tries to change Sparky's info, don't let him, here's the police report, they were like "um, he just called here, and we changed it" I made them change it back.

Still, even though he was mine and we weren't married, it took 2 months. In that time he lost weight, by the time I got him back, he weighed 62 pounds. He should be mid 80's.


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3280 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
LeopoldB
♂ Member
Member # 40606
Default  Posted: 11:19 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

For the good of the dogs... no!

They need to understand that you are now the sole alpha "male" in your pack. He betrayed the pack. Spending the night with him would confuse them. He should not feed or play with them at all. Especially no treats from him. They need the safety and closeness of your den.


Posts: 190 | Registered: Sep 2013
tushnurse
♀ Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 12:43 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Um, not just NO, but Hell NO!!!

He is doing this as a way to control you, as you said prior he really doesn't do much with them, or take care of them. Let him try to get them. Like Charlton Heston said, over my cold dead body. Seriously sweetie you owe him exactly 0.

Be strong, and stick to it.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8100 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
heartache101
♀ Member
Member # 26465
Default  Posted: 11:21 AM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He left the whole family! Fur babies included. He can not take the dogs.
Change the locks on your house if he has keys to door.
Do not let him near those dogs.
I would die if someone took mine!

Big hugs to you girl. You dont need him (WS).


There are degrees to which you let people back into your life and degrees to which you let them back into your heart-which, of course, are not the same thing

Posts: 3186 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Indiana
EvenKeel
♀ Member
Member # 24210
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In my case, I was going to do this.

When we were dividing up the stuff, discussing CS, etc...the ONLY thing he shed a tear about was the dog (never mind the M and kiddos).

Anyway, I told him he could take the dog the same time he had the kiddos. I thought it might help them with the transition back and forth.

First time for visitation....doggie is sitting by the door with the kids and their bags (it was like she knew she was getting to go too). Guess what, he took the kid's stuff and I said "What about doggie?" He said "Nah....we don't want to deal with the hair...."

REALLY - after you CRIED about taking her?

Poor dog - she was mopey all weekend.

He never said another word about it so she will never go now.


Eyes are useless if the mind is blind.


Posts: 2050 | Registered: May 2009 | From: Pa
Pentup
♀ Member
Member # 20563
Default  Posted: 12:55 PM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Even Keel that makes me despise your ex.

I checked about this with a lawyer at one time. Keep the dogs with you. Possession counts a great deal for dog "custody".


Me- BS
Him- FWS (I hope- F)

Posts: 6515 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: Not Oz
Topic Posts: 28
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