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Newest Member: tryingtolove (44683)

Reconciliation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Anti-versary tomorrow...walking my girls to school!
catlover50
♀ Member
Member # 37154
Default  Posted: 4:31 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You are an inspiration! I wish you peace and strength today. What a wonderful way to take this date back.



Dday -9/24/2012
Reconciling

Posts: 1728 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: northeast
cantaccept
♀ Member
Member # 37451
Default  Posted: 4:33 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((blakesteele))))

I will be thinking of you this morning and wishing you strength and peace.

You children are so lucky to have you. You are setting an amazing example for them.

You really don't need my wishes for strength, you continue to show it in every post.

This is such an important part of your life, I am so happy for you that you are reclaiming it.


Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh boots5050
attempted R, it was all a lie

Divorced 8/5/14


Posts: 1310 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Connecticut
blakesteele
♂ Member
Member # 38044
Default  Posted: 5:58 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((StillStandin1))) (((Itsaclimb)))

you both should have been in my opening post...you are both among the members I am specifically thankful for and specifically pray for!

Thanks once again for chiming in and supporting me.

It is I who is lucky to have my girls....what a blessing and joy they are. Proof that God exists....no way could my wife and I make something so special all on our own.

God is with us all.

.....2 hours and counting!

[This message edited by blakesteele at 6:07 AM, September 10th (Tuesday)]


ME: 42 BH, I don't PM female members
SHE: 38 EA
Married: 15 years
Together: 17 years
D/Day 9-10-12
NC: 10-25-12
NC: Broken early November 2012, OM not respond
2 girls; 7 and 10
Fear is payments on debts you have not

Posts: 3609 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Central Missouri
TxsT
♀ Member
Member # 39996
Default  Posted: 9:37 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

LOLOLOL Blake, we were both awake at the same time early this morning for very different reasons! I hope your morning is full of wonderful new memories, sprinkled with a few new hopes. Hug those kids, they grow up wayyyy to fast!!!!

T


Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)

Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!


Posts: 605 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: CDN
blakesteele
♂ Member
Member # 38044
Default  Posted: 10:05 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I DID IT!!!! It was wonderful. I am a morning person and it is so enjoyable to spend my most alert time with my family. My wife got up to see us off, my girls were full of life....okay, so my oldest is NOT a morning person, but I even delighted in her sluggishness!

It felt great all the way to the school.

As I left the school I felt a sudden and deep saddness...then anger....then back to saddness. And this is GREAT! I have developed SOME skills to move my anger out of the way to get to the underlying primary emotion.
This year has proven that this is a key and critical step from me to process through lifes trials.


Ironically...my wifes fAP was no where to be seen. I say ironically because last year I prayed he would NOT be there when I walked my girls to school...and each time he was. One time in particular he cut between me and a teacher I was visiting with....you can't get any closer than that!

But this time...when I was fully ready for this test...he did not happen.

I have come to realize their are no coincidences in life.

I can't say for sure why he was not there today...maybe God thought "Enough, blakesteele has passed the test...he is where I want him to be now with regards to this issue. He is now in a better position to accomplish the great things I have in store for him" Maybe not. I am doing what many of you have told me to do....enjoy the present! So I will not overthink this....much.

I will tell you it was if I stepped up to the plate, primed to hit one out of the park....and the pitcher intentionally walked me to first base.

Yeah, I would have liked to increase my batting average...but, hey, I am on base and my team (my family) has a better chance of scoring a run now. So who am I to feel dissappointed?

God is with me....he is with my family....he is with all of us.

This was a good event.

p.s. Who would have thought a 42 year old man who has battled wild fires in the rockies would consider the simiple act of walking his girls to school such an accomplishment? Hardly the things movies are made of...would be laughable to the average, non-affair affected man.

Thanks to the many on here who continue to suppport me...both directly with nice posts and indirectly by their courage to post their personal and not so glamorous struggles to process through adultery.

[This message edited by blakesteele at 10:10 AM, September 10th (Tuesday)]


ME: 42 BH, I don't PM female members
SHE: 38 EA
Married: 15 years
Together: 17 years
D/Day 9-10-12
NC: 10-25-12
NC: Broken early November 2012, OM not respond
2 girls; 7 and 10
Fear is payments on debts you have not

Posts: 3609 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Central Missouri
blakesteele
♂ Member
Member # 38044
Default  Posted: 10:12 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My schedule is such that I will NOT be able to pick my girls up today, as I had originally planned.

BUT, I can meet with each of them at lunch and share that meal with them....which is still a pretty cool way to spend my 1 year antiversary!


ME: 42 BH, I don't PM female members
SHE: 38 EA
Married: 15 years
Together: 17 years
D/Day 9-10-12
NC: 10-25-12
NC: Broken early November 2012, OM not respond
2 girls; 7 and 10
Fear is payments on debts you have not

Posts: 3609 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Central Missouri
TxsT
♀ Member
Member # 39996
Default  Posted: 10:21 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Blake....I am so happy to see the excitement in your post. I actually felt how upset you were to not be able to swing at even one of those pitches!!!!

It is so fulfilling to see someone get to where they are no longer sliding backwards. The excitement they hold for a new beginning..... The chance of even better things to come in the future.

Enjoy lunch with your girls. and then give your wife a killer smile and a hug when you see her later. She will know instantly that you have been able to scale the hardest part of your journey and she will get some relief that you are making it happen.....now!!!!

T

Such a happy day


Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)

Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!


Posts: 605 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: CDN
StillStanding1
♀ Member
Member # 40144
Default  Posted: 11:40 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So VERY VERY happy for you and proud of your progress...

Darn it, the screen is all blurry again and the allergies are making my nose run... Need Kleenex.

Enjoy your lunch!!!!


Me: 40s BS, Him: 40s WH
M 21 yrs - 3 teens
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday = 2/10/13, he moved out, he officially moved back in 1/25/14 and our work continues...

Posts: 654 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: MidWest
HoneyMe
♀ Member
Member # 40613
Default  Posted: 11:59 AM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

New poster, but I having been reading your story. I am glad your morning with your girls was great. I wish you many more.


3 A's
Blinded-sided DD 9/2011
Again 11/2011 and then more truth the next day. Separated 4 months. 2012, the year of truth and reconciliation.

Posts: 64 | Registered: Sep 2013
blakesteele
♂ Member
Member # 38044
Default  Posted: 12:21 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

thank you TxsT, Stillstanding1, and Honeyme...it is a good day.


ME: 42 BH, I don't PM female members
SHE: 38 EA
Married: 15 years
Together: 17 years
D/Day 9-10-12
NC: 10-25-12
NC: Broken early November 2012, OM not respond
2 girls; 7 and 10
Fear is payments on debts you have not

Posts: 3609 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Central Missouri
LA44
♀ Member
Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 12:23 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

YESSSSS! I knew one day I would open this up and see this post from you my friend!

You have already made the walk. So for this morning and from here on out remember what I said to you this past summer....we are all walking with you.

Blessings to you!
LA


Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2228 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
TxsT
♀ Member
Member # 39996
Default  Posted: 12:36 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

LA.....yeah that's a great way of putting it and I would even be willing to stand up to OM if need be.....!!!!

T


Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)

Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!


Posts: 605 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: CDN
blakesteele
♂ Member
Member # 38044
Default  Posted: 12:36 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((LA44)))))

You are one of my original brat pack members ....good to hear from you!

What wonderful support from ya'll! (That's how my good friend in Texas talks....guess I am thinking of him today too!)

[This message edited by blakesteele at 12:38 PM, September 10th (Tuesday)]


ME: 42 BH, I don't PM female members
SHE: 38 EA
Married: 15 years
Together: 17 years
D/Day 9-10-12
NC: 10-25-12
NC: Broken early November 2012, OM not respond
2 girls; 7 and 10
Fear is payments on debts you have not

Posts: 3609 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Central Missouri
bionicgal
♀ Member
Member # 39803
Default  Posted: 12:47 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It is a victory for BSes and marriages affected by adultery, everywhere. Blessings to you, my man.


me - BS (40s)
DDay - June 2013, A was 2+ months, EA then PA
In MC & Reconciling
An affair is more like a mental break than a relationship.

I edit, therefore I am.


Posts: 1874 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
LA44
♀ Member
Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 2:42 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You are one of my original brat pack members

You got it! (have been laying low with school just starting but its all good).

Look at all the wonderful comments for you. Today was a good day for me, reading this made it that much better.

As they say in Texas.....
YEEEEHAAAA!


Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2228 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
wifehad5
♂ Moderator
Member # 15162
Default  Posted: 4:48 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I love this blake! Thanks for posting it


FBH - 42
FWW - 43 (BrokenRoad)
2 kids 7&12

The people you do your life with shape the life you live


Posts: 36903 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Michigan
brokensmile322
♀ Member
Member # 35758
Default  Posted: 5:36 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have been away from home most of the day. Stopped in for a quick check and saw your post!!

Can't respond now, but so very happy for you Blakesteele!

Can't wait to read all the post, catchup with what happened and to respond appropriately!!


Me BS 42 Him WS 44
OW Coworker DDay April 7, 2012
EA on a slippery slope...

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. ~Viktor Frankl

"When you are happy, you can forgive a great deal."


Posts: 1442 | Registered: Jun 2012
still2suspicious
♀ Member
Member # 31722
Default  Posted: 5:52 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Your joy comes thru, loud and clear, blake.

Although it's been many years for me, having lunch with my babies was always a blessed event.

You made me smile today.


Me: BS
Him: WH
DDay: LTEA

Posts: 1278 | Registered: Apr 2011 | From:
ILINIA
♀ Member
Member # 39836
Default  Posted: 6:21 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Love this! You are an inspiration!


Entering R slowly and cautiously...

Posts: 444 | Registered: Jul 2013
Skan
♀ Member
Member # 35812
Default  Posted: 9:01 PM, September 10th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations on reaching this day, with dignity, and with JOY!

TJ, Wildland fires? How interesting! I just retired about 1.5 years ago from Large Animal Fire Rescue from the Humane Society. And I have to say, I don't miss it at all, especially the part where we had to come back after fires passed through to vet check ranches...


Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.

D-Day, June 10, 2012



Posts: 4713 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: So California
Topic Posts: 52
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3

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