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Update on he doesn't know that I know
Hollywood could not have scripted this better. I have a "mind movie" of my own with the credits rolling as she leaves the bar trying to explain to her new beau why a stranger (especially another woman) sent her that aptly-named drink and raised her glass in salute.
Where the hell is the "like" (how about a "you're awesome") button here?
Karmita I remember you.
I wish you the best of luck!
This thread needs a sticky, it's THAT CLASSIC!
Honestly what was his reaction if I may ask? I saw he has called and texted you a lot! Is he shocked that you pulled it off like that? Sorry I just wish I could have seen his face and pictured how my WS would look. You rock!
Thanks everyone for your kind words and encouragement.
Coming here has helped me move forward and I appreciate and feel a connection to those of us here who are going through difficult times.
Hugs to everyone
My ex ( Mr. butt Plug) got fired from his job. I heard, he's now living in his mother's basement.
That basement is a 1970's fake wall paneling dank shag carpeted hell hole with only two small windows. His mother, is a bingo playing hoarse voiced smoker. Her idea of dinner is ketchup sandwiches. They never got along and she must be pissed off he's mooching off her.
I know it's mean of me to enjoy the misery and bad luck he's found himself in.....scratch that ......the old me would feel bad for him,,,.the new me is laughing my head off and thoroughly enjoying his bad luck ....grin:
Personally, I like the *new* you better!
I hope you do too!
Thank you 5454real, I like the new me too.
Ok, when I first posted I didn't realize there was so much to the story and this was just an update. So I'm taking off the hugs and just leaving the high fives! Reading this just my year, and I tip my hat to you!!!
Actually, throwing in a hug anyway...even warrior princesses need hugs!
[This message edited by MakingMyFuture at 1:15 AM, June 6th (Friday)]
Oh my goodness. Do I need you to script my leaving npd monster after close on house Dale. Just posted long long under divorce separation. If you get a chance would love some thing a la karmita! ! If only....
Oh my goodness. Wow. If only you could script my leaving npd monster after close on house sale. Just posted long long under divorce separation. If you get a chance would love some thing a la karmita! ! Or no worries. We all have so much on our plates. Congrats on your awesomeness.
I am glad you had a sister who had gone through two affairs to help you navigate this properly.
I am sorry you even have to be here.
You are one gutsy girl.
Omg... I absolutely love you. None of us deserved any of this, but how in the world could a man not cherish you!!! mind-boggling.
He has got to be SICK with regret. You are a role model. You should start a blog
I'm so happy for you.
Thanks everyone for wishing me well. I appreciate your kindness.
I've got a great support system, amazing friends, and a sister who I love so much,...without her I doubt I could have worn my new bitch boots without breaking my ankles.
Also...for the poster TheAgonyOfIt, thank you for your response. I wish I could have magic words to make everything ok for you. I can only tell you what my sister said to me. "Think with your head and not with your emotions, follow through with what's best for you. Be cool, be fierce, be smart.
I just bought a house. My own house. It's a fixer upper but it's mine.
While being married to "butt plug", he had made buying a house something so out of reach. I realize it was because he couldn't handle responsibility. He made my dream of a real home seem selfish of me. The thing is, he was selfish, he didn't want a real home.
Funny, I got my house and he's living in his crazy mother's basement.
Awesome for you, Karmita!!! So happy for you!!!
Thanks for updating. I followed your story last year & think it is a good one for all newbies to read for inspiration!!!
You really do need to write a screen-play. In Shakespearian wording of course.
Congrats on your new home!!!
I've been reading here at SI, and I know I can't really help anyone with advice. We all have to get to where we need to be within our own time.
The only thing I can say, is that cheaters have downgraded the value of the person they cheat on. But if we all take a step back, we can say "no" to the downgrade that was imposed on us. Cheaters Expect you to buy into being less than.
The value we place in ourselves is not up to a cheater.
I was so scared, it has been hard, but I will not be a downgrade, I will not allow a cheater to determine my value.
I never saw your thread until today as I only became a member here in April. O-M-G!!! YOU KNOW YOU ROCKED!!
Your sister was right in her advice to you: think with your head and not your emotions. You did what SO MANY should do here and are emotionally powerless to do: put the trash out on the lawn and slam the door. I don't know the beginnings of your story and how you found out and how you kept it secret but your birthday surprise as many said is FREAKING PRICELESS!!! And the OSCAR GOES TO:::: KARMITA!!!
What is very, VERY awe inspiring is not only did you pull off such a wonderful job informing him, but you stood your ground and NEVER looked back to him. Sure, it was painful. Sure, in the dark at night you were probably second guessing yourself but to HIM? Full speed trash removal. You said in another thread that he is balding, has a pot belly, mouth gard and farts. NOW he lives in his mothers basement. SOME CATCH he is now!!
In all seriousness, he has fucked up his life with the butt plug as a souvenir if Hauren gave it him. For those of us as BS, we would have NEVER hurt them in a million years. This is what happens when they start to fuck up their own lives.
Good for you! You have a wonderful support system, a new home, an ex apartment that you called yours, a raise and new lease on life. KUDDOS TO YOU KARMITA!!