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Divorce/Separation Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Progress
HurtsButImOK
♀ Member
Member # 38865
Happy  Posted: 7:25 AM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Got an email from X today following up on progress of settlement, first contact in 2 weeks. Email popped up, no usual stab of pain, it was more like an absence of emotion.

Im claiming progress. NC really is the way forward. I think I see indifference on the horizon


Me: Awesome - 35

"I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel". –Maya Angelou

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be". –


Posts: 716 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Australia
lieshurt
♀ Member
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 10:58 AM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Posts: 13356 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
Pass
♂ Member
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 11:53 AM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Progress is nice.


Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 10 and 13
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after married 17 years, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous


Posts: 1354 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
SBB
♀ Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 4:52 PM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have a visual image of lots of little strings of web attached to me coming from him. It is time consuming but one by one they are easy to break - trying to break them all at once is very difficult.

Every moment you maintain NC is like you're busting down one of those strings. Eventually the web collapses.

I used to think consequences would be my retribution. Turns out it is indifference.

Don't be surprised if you go through some peaks and troughs. I was quite surprised because I thought I was 'done' with that horrid stuff once I went through it once. We seem to go through all of the stages of grief in random order and multiple times.

I am now 18m from DD and I barely recognise the broken, abused, numb person I became during that toxic M nor the angry, humiliated, indignant, hurting, injured person I was in the months afterwards.

I found NC so difficult in the early days - now it is as easy as breathing. I'm still reaching for complete indifference. I don't know that that is 100% possible when I have to share kids with this lower muppet but I'm pretty happy with 99%.


Sending all of the love and strength I can muster to Phoenix1 and her family.
"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal."

Posts: 4561 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
nowiknow23
♀ Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 4:53 PM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yay, Hurts!


You can call me NIK

There's always failure. And there's always disappointment. And there's always loss.
But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums.
- Michael J. Fox


Posts: 22672 | Registered: Aug 2011
Topic Posts: 5

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