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Newest Member: Sunnyhopeful82 (45341)

Just Found Out Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Helping karma
Hope2B
♀ Member
Member # 40474
Default  Posted: 9:25 PM, September 11th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just about everything WH told me was a lie, and I believed him. He put a spin on what happened, and I found out that wasn't true. The A was going on longer than he said, and he was spinning me a yarn to do damage control. It wasn't that he was loaning the poor pitiful Damsel in Distress money, he knew full well he was paying for sex. I guess I'm the *simple-minded* one because I bought his story.

And of course, the lies kept piling up. He admitted that the first time they got together, it was like he was going on a date. Oh goody.

When I initially found out in Feb, I insisted on no contact--he doesn't call her and he doesn't take her calls. He agreed. I asked him about this a while after Discovery Day, and he said they had no contact.

Cell phone records reveal otherwise. The day after D. Day, he called her NINE times. Guess he couldn't get hold of her. The day AFTER that, he tried again, and she called him back and they spoke for 11 minutes.

He "warned" her that I knew everything and told her to watch out because I was using the internet to find out all about her. This is ANOTHER one of his lies, because I didn't do that until a week later when I hired two private investigators.

He has guilt but no remorse. Through all this, he hasn't shed one single tear at how much he's hurt me. He said he was just tired of not having sex (except with himself) for 10 years. I didn't correct him that it's been over 25 years, but I did say "Are you forgetting that I haven't had sex in 10 years, too?"

I told him that I don't want him to touch me, and asked if he still wanted to stay married under those circumstances. He said yes.

I told him that his last blowjob was with the skank and he'd never have one from me ever again, and if he went out on me again, --I couldn't resist saying this-- then after he got out of the hospital, he wouldn't be living under my roof. I asked him to repeat what I said, so I can be sure he understood.

At his camping trip, his two buddies asked why he can't go anywhere by himself, and he disclosed that he had been unfaithful & I didn't trust him. No one (both single guys, never married, in their very late 50s, early 60s) seemed all that shocked.

I'm helping karma (wink) because I think he must be stopped up or something, so I put a little extra fiber in his food. He's going to be real regular. Every. Single. Day.

If it wasn't for my savings account (ALL of which was from my earnings!) and our living in a community property state, I would have kicked him to the curb. I looked into a post-nuptual agreement, and in my state, it's likely to be not supported if things get to court. That puts me between a rock and a hard spot.

Hope2B......not such a damned fool again

[This message edited by Hope2B at 2:01 AM, September 12th (Thursday)]


Me: early 60s
Him: 65 yrs old, LTA w/a pro$titute
Married since 1980, no children
DDay: Feb. 25, 2013
Trickle Truth Days: Sept 10, 11, 13, 15 (2013)
His affair--says it was only 8 times 1x/mo, then found out it was 7 YEARS 2-3x/mo or maybe ever 4x/mo

Posts: 359 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: out west/west coast U.S.A.
mchercheur
♀ Member
Member # 37735
Default  Posted: 6:37 AM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm helping karma (wink) because I think he must be stopped up or something, so I put a little extra fiber in his food. He's going to be real regular. Every. Single. Day.

Hope2B, I just spit my coffee out laughing! Thanks, you gave my day a great start!

But seriously, I feel your anger---& you have a right to feel that way. I am between a rock & a hard place too, for different reasons, but I understand believe me.

(((Hope2B)))


together 25 yrs, married 24 yrs, 4 children;Rebuilding
D Day: 5/10/2011 PA
OW: WH's co-worker,divorced, no children, 20 yrs younger than I-----& she knew he was married, had met our kids, but that did not stop her from trying to destroy our family

Posts: 1396 | Registered: Dec 2012
Broken6
♀ Member
Member # 40347
Default  Posted: 11:03 AM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am sorry that he lied and the A was more than he professed. Isn't that what they do, hold back incriminating details so we aren't AS angry, or AS hurt? I guess my question to them is, in comparison to what? Knowing the truth, and them telling the truth is a matter of respect and just plain human decency after what they have done. I don't get that this common courtesy is so hard to register. Lying only makes it worse, and lies of omission count too. I am so sorry you are finding out more about the story, but glad that you are taking the initiative to verify things, it shows a great deal of courage and strength on your part. I also want to add, that I think it is wonderful that through it all, you have not lost your sense of humor. I think it is wonderful to see that even though he knocked the wind out of your sails, you are afloat, and very seaworthy. Hugs to you, you are an inspiration to me.


The grass isn't greener on the other side, it is greener where you water it.

Posts: 58 | Registered: Aug 2013
Topic Posts: 3

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